This is horrible, it feels horrible! I feel like fucking shit because I miss Marshall so freaking much that it would be better if someone just ripped my heart out, at least I wouldn't feel like this then. We talk to each other every day and it's nice and all but I just need him to hold me tight and place sweet kisses on my lips. It's been a week so far and I don't think I'm gonna survive this, why does it have to be like this?
It's Christmas tomorrow and I still feel bad for not having any gift for Rachel but it's really difficult to buy her something when I got no money, I know Rachel understands my situation but it still sucks.
Today I have a job interview at a nightclub which I really and I really hope to get the job, it just sucks that I have to start from the bottom again. I've been so use to running everything with Kevin at the club, I could choose my own hours and I earned some really good money, now I'm going for a job interview as a fucking bartender, like come on!
I walk into the club for my job interview, the club actually looks really nice but nothing like my old clubs so I can't help thinking about what changes I would make if it was my club.
I walk towards mr. Richards the owner of the club and he looks at me with a little tiny smile on his face, he looks like a person who just thinks he's better than everyone else because he's the boss, I hate people like that and I've never been like that to my employees or people who came for a job interview. I would think that mr. Richards is in his early 30s and he's actually really good looking but even if I didn't have Marshall I'd never go for him because of my first impression already.
"Hello miss Dane." Mr. Richards says and shakes my hand.
"Hello mr. Richard." I say politely.
"Just call me Dan." He says and we sit down on a chair on the each side of the table. "So.. I actually find it very interesting that you've owned 3 clubs, what concerns me is that suddenly out of nowhere you signed the clubs over to your partner Kevin Jones." Dan says cutting right to the case.
"Me and Kevin were engaged and now that we aren't anymore then it just can't seem to work." I half lie.
"So you decided to sign over the clubs to him?" He asks confused. I can only assume Dan thinks that it's very weird that I would do that when I'm a business woman, after all I could just move myself to another department.
"Yes after all it was his clubs to start with." I say not wanting to tell him how I was forced to sign over the clubs.
"Okay." He says and looks down at my papers again shortly before he speaks again. "So what do you expect to do here? Do you expect to be more than just a bartender?" He asks and this just confirms my feeling about him. He thinks that I'm gonna walk in here and tell him how to run his club when I'm really just humble and looking for a job.
"I'm not expecting anything, I just want a job." I inform him.
"So you don't have any ambitions?" He asks me and now I honestly thinks he's getting rude.
"Of course I have but I don't see why it's relevant for this job interview." I say as I frown my brows at him.
"This is just about me getting to know you." He says smirking. He really confuses me right now because he's really rude with his questions but at the same time something tells me that he's interesting in hiring me.
"Then hire me." I say which makes him chuckle.
"Feisty, I like it." He says with a smirk. Is he fucking flirting with me? I really need this job but I can't handle my boss flirting with me specially not when i have Marshall, maybe he isn't flirting with me, maybe I just misunderstands his signals.
I don't say anything mostly because I don't know what to say after his comment, so I just sit there looking at him coldly making sure that I don't send him signals he could misunderstand. "You're hired." He then says. What?! Is he serious?!
"Really?" I ask him surprised.
"Yes you'll start January 3th." He says.
"What time should I be here?" I ask.
"Be here at 8 then it gives us time to talk about your salary." He says and I get up.
"Thank you so much." I say and he gets up as well to shake my hand.
"You're welcome." He says smiling. I can already tell that it's gonna be very interesting to work for him and not in a good way, not to sound smug or anything but I can tell when men wants me and Dan wants me, I can tell that he's eating me with his eyes and not to talk about how quickly he offered be the job, that's very unusual because I would never do that if it was me.
I decide to stop by Melissa, we haven't seen each other much lately because of all this mess which has been going on and strangely she works a lot lately.
When Melissa opens the door she looks really tired and stressed which is really unusual for her.
"Are you okay hon?" I ask her as I hug her.
"Not really, I've been working so much lately that I don't even have time to be me anymore." She says as we sit down on the couch. I can't help but thinking if Kevin takes this whole thing between me and him out on Melissa.
"Have you talked to Kevin about it?" I ask her and she immediately laugh sarcastically while she shakes her head.
"Kevin is not someone any of us dares to talk to lately." She informs me.
"What do you mean?" I ask.
"If you say one thing that doesn't pleases him you get fired." She sighs.
"I'm sorry." I say and look down because I kinda feels that this is my fault. I've felt how big of an asshole Kevin can be lately and I know that he has any intention to hurt me right now.
"It was just easier with you around because we could always talk to you." Melissa says.
"I wish I still could be around." I say honestly. I wish that me and Kevin could just make it work as friends, it would be so much easier to run the clubs that way, not only for me but also for him because I know how stressed he gets when he has to run all this shit alone.
"Have he said anything to you?" I ask.
"He just said to me one day that I had to get use to not getting special treatments anymore." She says. I can't believe that Kevin has said that to her, Melissa has also been his friend for years so I really don't understand why he would say something like that to her.
"He said that?" I ask shocked and she nods. "Do you consider to quit?"
"Yeah I'm actually searching for a new job." She says. "Hey how did it go with your job interview?" She asks apparently remembering that I've just been to an job interview.
"I got the job." I say smiling and Melissa gives me a high five. "But I already know that it's gonna be very interesting and not in a good way." I tell her.
"How come?" Melissa asks.
"The owner flirted with me." I say and she gasps.
Me and Melissa sit and talk for hours before she has to go to work. I can't help but thinking about the treatment Kevin has been giving Melissa and the more I think about it the more angry I get, so I decide later at night to stop by the club to talk to Kevin, I know it didn't turned out well last time but i have to talk to him, I just have to control my temper.
I drive to the nightclub and because I don't wanna stand in the line I take the backdoor, the backdoor leads right to the hall where Kevin's office is at, the backdoor is locked but luckily I have a spare key which Kevin has forgotten all about. I enter the door and go straight to Kevin's office and knock on the door.
"Come in." I hear him say on the other side of the door so I open the door gently and Kevin's eyes widens when he sees me. "How did you get in here?" He asks me.
"The backdoor, I have a spare key." I say and show it to him while I close the door behind me.
"You know if I call the police then they're gonna arrest you, right?" He asks coldly while I just walks towards him.
"Don't you think you've put me through enough?" I ask him and take a seat on the other side of the desk in front of him.
"Not compared to what you've done to me." He says through his gritted teeth.
"Okay so I broke your heart but guess what Kevin? You broke mine too." I inform him and he laughs sarcastically. It maybe sounds strange but it's truth, it breaks my heart that I had to break his heart and it breaks my heart that he has been so cruel to me.
"I broke your heart?" He asks still laughing.
"Yeah it breaks my heart that you can be this cruel to me, even after what happened I still care about you, believe it or not." I say honestly. I do care about Kevin and I always will, I do also hate him for what he has done to me but I've been with him so many years so it would be more strange not to still care.
"If you gave a shit about me you would never have cheated." He says angrily.
"Don't you realize which fucked up position I was put in? Suddenly 8 years later Marshall stands there in front of me, I never got over that boy, I never got over that me and him were suppose to have a future together, that we shared some dreams together, that we made promises together and then I had to leave. I know that I can't justify it no matter what I say but Marshall is something special to me and I can't control it." I explain and he just rolls his eyes. "Don't you think for one minute that this is easy for me, I hate myself for doing what I did to you because you've been nothing but good to me throughout the years." I say.
"And that was a mistake." He says angrily.
"Do you think us was a mistake?" I ask him feeling kinda hurt that he would say something like that even though he's angry. "Because you're one of the best that has ever happened to me." I say. I can't deny that Kevin made me very very happy and we had some good years, he has helped me a lot and he has been very good to me.
"I find that very hard to believe Amelia." He says. I can't really blame him for mistrusting my words, if he had cheated on me and told me that I was one of the best things that has ever happened to him then I would never have believe him.
"I understand." I say and look down and there's a moment of silence.
"So is that why you're here? To tell me once again that you're sorry?" He asks me. I almost forgot why I came here because every time I see Kevin I even get angry or feel the need to apologize.
"No." I say at look at him. "I stopped by Melissa today." I say and Kevin roll his eyes which pisses me off. "Why do you roll your eyes? She's your friend too." I say which makes him laugh sarcastically again.
"She was when we were together but she isn't anymore, she's your best friend Amelia and she'll always put your first." He says.
"That's not a reason for treating her so badly." I say and his brows frowns.
"When the fuck have I treated her badly?" He asks me angrily.
"Kevin she looks like shit because you force her to work so much." I inform him.
"Because I need her here." He says.
"You told her that she had to get use to not getting special treatment anymore." I say.
"Because that's the true." He says coldly.
"I gave her a day off one time, one fucking time Kevin." I say angrily and continue "Do you know that all your employers don't like what you've become?They don't feel like they can talk to you." I ask him and I can see that he gets angry but I don't care, this is no way to treat your employers.
"Why is this your concern?" He asks me.
"Because no one wants to work for an asshole so if you want to lose everything then go ahead." I say. I would hate for my clubs to go up in smoke because he's an asshole so he better get his ass together.
"I've already lost everything." He mumbles and looks down. I get really surprised because all I've been seeing from him lately is anger and this is the first time he shows me how broken he is.
"Kevin.." I say as I get up and I'm about to walk over to him when he stops me.
"Don't." He says which makes me freeze, he looks at me and for the first time I can see the hurt in his eyes. "How do you think it feels that you not only cheated on me but you also cheated on me with a world famous rapper so when you publish your relationship I have to see it in any damn magazine?" He asks me. I have actually thought about that and it must be terrible and no one deserves what I've done to Kevin, even though I'm angry about the fact that he has been blackmailing be, stealing my money and pressing charges against me then I do feel sorry for him. I would like for us to just forget about all that and stop fighting each other.
"It must be terrible, trust me I've thought about that." I say as I sit down on my chair again. "But how do you think it feels to be forced to sign over my clubs? I was to a fucking job interview earlier today as a bartender and I have to start over because you robbed my bank account and now I have to pay for a lawyer and all that shit because you're pressing charges against me, I can't afford that." I say.
"Amelia drop it.. Marshall is gonna pay for all that." Kevin sighs.
"No because I won't let him, why the fuck do you think I've got myself a job?" I ask him.
"I'm gonna drop the charges, alright?" Kevin says and I mentally drop my jaw in surprise, I didn't expect that at all.
"Thank you so much, really." I say grateful for him being a bigger person right now.
"All this is fucking stupid anyways." He sighs. "I'm done using all my energy on this feud." I'm really glad that he feels like that because it removes a lot of pressure from shoulders. There's a moment of silence mostly because I don't know what to say, I really wanna run one of the clubs but I have no idea how to suggest him it in a right way.
"So are you gonna find a new partner?" I ask him.
"No."
"What are you gonna do then? We both know that you're gonna get stressed." I say.
"I've done it before Amelia, I think I can do it again." He says irritated.
"Why won't you let me run one of the clubs?" I ask him.
"Because I can't work with you after what you've done Amelia, I'm gonna be an asshole to you all the time and it's just not gonna work, I'm not ready for that." He tells me.
"If you one day are then you can just give me a call." I say and get up from the chair, Kevin doesn't say anything so I just speak again. "Thank you for dropping the charges and think about what I said." I say and walk towards the door.
"Amelia." He says as I grab the doorknob which makes me turn around to look at him. "You were never a mistake." He says. He must has seen how much his words hurt me since he says that now.
"Thank you." I say and opens the door. "Take care." I say as I leave his office and go out to my car and decide to call Marshall right away.
"Yo baby I was just about to call you." He says which makes me smile like a clown.
"I have good news." I say.
"What?"
"First, I got the job."
"Great babe."
"And Kevin is gonna drop the charges against me." I say and there's a moment of silence.
"Have you talked to him?" He then asks me.
"Yes I just left the club."
"You were at his club?" He asks and I know he's jalousie again.
"I just had a talk with him baby and he decided to drop the charges, that's good news, right?"
"Yeah man of course it is but I don't get it, why would he do it? What does he get out of it?"
"I just think he realized how much damage he did to me."
"What about your money? What about the clubs? Is he gonna return that?"
"No."
"Then it doesn't really make a difference Amelia, if he really realized how much damaged he did then he would at least return your money."
"I'm just glad that I'm not gonna go through a court case."
"Have you considered that he dropped the charges because he's afraid that I'm gonna get you a good lawyer which can get to the bottom of what happened to your money?" Marshall asks. Fuck! I didn't even think about that but would Kevin really think like that? I mean, he didn't know that I was gonna drop by today so it couldn't be possible.. Have he already dropped the charges? Wouldn't the police have contacted me then? I don't know what to believe. "Amelia?" Marshall says when I don't say anything.
"No I didn't think about that." I admit.
"I'm glad that the charges are dropped but you gotta understand why I find it strange."
"I do."
"When are you gonna start your new job?"
"January 3th."
"Now that the charges are dropped are you then gonna spend the New Years with me?" He asks. I really want to spend the New Years with him but I have to talk with Rachel because I can't just leave her at home alone.
"I have to make sure if it's okay with Rachel." I say.
"I'm gonna spend it in Cali."
"With who?"
"Dre, my boys and his boys." He says. We talk for all my drive home about the New Years, I say to him that I don't know if I'm gonna fit in in those parties but he just tells me that I'm gonna love Dre's wife but I still have to make sure that it's okay with Rachel.
Marshall even suggests that I should come to Detroit a couple of days before New Years so we could spend some time alone together, I would really like that because I miss him so damn much, right now I'm actually sure I'd cry if I saw him.