Emma's POV:
I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't do anything without not thinking about Harry. I haven't felt good this whole day. I've been puking, can't stand normally on my legs, got such a bad head ache. But I can't tell Harry, he's gonna worry about me and I don't want him to worry about me. He got a lot on his mind.
But why did I call him then? If I don't want him to know, why did I call him.
To hear his voice. Hear him, I needed to hear him.
"There is nothing, I mean it, Harry." I tell him again over the phone "I shouldn't have called" I mumble the last part
"No no no! I'm happy you've called! I actual just wanted to call you, my love. Cuz I got great news!" He sounds happy, I don't wanna ruin that happiness by telling that I haven't felt good. I just have to suck it up and be happy for whatever news he's gonna tell me.
"My dad remembers me! Love, my dad remembers me!!" He almost yells into my ear. I hear his laugh. How happy he is. I instantly get happy myself.
"That's such good news! I'm so happy for you, Harry!" Just when I said it, it feels like in need to throw up.
Not now! Please not now!
"Emma? Are you sure you're alright?"
"Yes, yes, I'm fi-" I throw my phone on the bed and run towards the bathroom, but halfway through my legs gave out and I fall on the ground. Trying to catch myself and throwing up.
I hear Harry on the background screaming.
I shouldn't have called.
~•~
"Okay, you got me... I'm not fine" Harry and I FaceTimed the minute he was in his hotel room.
When I finally stopped puking I couldn't stand for some time. So I just laid there, in my own gross puke until I could stand again. Harry kept screaming into the phone while he rushed towards his hotel room to FaceTime me. When I could finally stand again I first told Harry that I was alright. I wasn't really alright, but I stopped puking and I could stand again. Then I changed clothes and cleaned everything up.
"Emma..." I can see and hear the disappointment and worry. It breaks me. I know I shouldn't have lied but I just didn't want to worry him. He already got so much on his mind.
"I'm sorry, I- I just didn't wanted to worry you" don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.
"I know, love, but please, the next time, just tell me" he gives me a small smile. I nod.
"Okay, my little star, please tell me now. What's wrong? What exactly happened?"
"I-I... I just don't feel well"
"There's more, I know there's more."
"Why must there always be more? Huh!?" I snap at him "What if there isn't more?! Can't I just don't feel well? Isn't that enough?" I feel tears prick in my eyes "isn't it enough? Well? Answer me then!"
"I-I, Emma, I didn't ment it like that. Emma, love, I'm sorry. But..."
deep down I know I should just except his apology, I know he didn't ment it like that, and there is more, but for some reason I can't stop, like everything just comes out. Just like that
"Stop it! I don't wanna hear your but! I'm just so sick of this. All of this! Everything! Everybody! Why must there always be more? with me there must always be more! Always! Why?" I feel hot tears run down my cheek as I break down "I just want everything to stop! I just want to sleep! I- I just want to sleep" I can't look at Harry, he probably looks at me like I'm some baby that needs to be pitied.
"Why can't I have a normal family? I know that isn't your fault... but why me? And... why must my own best friend just betray me? Why did my ex cheat on me? What did I ever do to deserve that? Why do you need to go? I just want you here! I can't do this... I can't pretend I'm happy when I'm not! I can't pretend like nothing happened when I fact way too much happened to me! My own fucking father abused me! Yeah, think about that, I first didn't want to believe it, cuz after all it's my dad... he wouldn't do that right? Well he did! He just pulled me with my hair upstairs like it was nothing... and you know what's the worst? My mother just looked. She just stood there and looked... like it was some freaking show!" I gasp for air. Unable to breathe normal.
But I'm not done, I'm far from done. It all comes out. Like it just waited for me to snap
"AND YOU KNOW WHATS THE WORST!? It's all ADRIANS FAULT! ITS MY FUCKING EXES FAULT! My first ever boyfriend, which I loved so damn much and would've given my life for. I've had with him for fuckin 2 whole years! HE JUST CHEATED ON ME! BLAMED ME AND THEN FOR THE CHERRY ON TOP... TOLD MY PARENTS, my fuckin parents! And..." I can't breathe normally anymore. Tears stream over my cheeks and in my mouth. "Just... just give me a damn break"
"Love, love, please look at me...breathe in and out, yes? Emma? Emma!? Please keep breathing!" I look up to Harry on the phone, he looks so worried, I try to breathe in and out, just like he told me to. "Good, okay, do you want me to come?"
His question confuses me. What about his dad? "Huh, what? But what about your dad?"
"That doesn't matter, if you need me more I'll come to you"
"No, no, no don't, your dad needs you more!"
"Okay then, but you just have to tell me and I'll come, okay?"
"Yes, okay" i already know I won't tell him he needs to come. If I wanted to be with him I would be there. I would've taken the flight with him to his dad. I decided to not go with him so now I just need to accept the consequences.
"I love you" Harry's husky voice gets me out of my thoughts and I look at him, worry still in his eyes.
"I love you too"
A few minutes later we say our byes and hung up.
Harry's POV:
I'm on the verge to buy the first flight in the morning and fly to Emma. I need to hold her, kiss her. She needs me and I'm not there. I feel bad and stupid for even leaving her. After all the shit that had happened to her I just decide to leave her, for who? My dad? Who hasn't been there for me for like half of my life.
When I asked Emma if she wanted me to come of course she said no, but I saw it in her eyes; she needed me. And maybe that sounds selfish, but I don't care. I need her as well.
My dad remembers me, but he only remembers the good times. He remembers the time when mom was still there. When I was stil his little monkey. But those times are over. They were over a long time ago.
Don't get me wrong. I have it good. My dad isn't as worse as it sounds. He's not as worse as Emma her father. But... before Kate. It was worse before Kate came along. Before her it was the worst with my dad. So now I'm afraid. Afraid that he'll be like that again.
So he needs to remember her again, otherwise... I don't know, I don't wanna think about it.
So, if you would give me a choice to either go to Emma or stay here with my dad. I'll choose Emma. I may just know her for what? Less than a month? But she means more to me than my dad ever was, and ever will be.
"Harry?" I look over to the door and see Anna standing there in the doorway "is everything alright?" Her little face stands worried.
"Yes, sweet pea. Everything's alright. Why are you asking?" I sit up as she walks up to me and slowly sits on the bed
"Cuz... well you just stormed in here.... And then I heard you on the phone with Emma..." her voice is soft and on the verge of tears
"Hey, hey, don't worry. Everything's alright. Emma just didn't feel quite well, that's it." I spread my arms for her to come in and she immediately nestles her body in my arms as I hug her.
"Harry?" She says after a while as she looks up to me
"Yes?"
"If... if Emma really needs you... will you promise me to go to her?" Her big doe eyes look questionable up to me
I wait for a few seconds to answer her. She's asking me to promise her to go to Emma and leave her? She's asking me to just go to the love of my life whenever she asks me to and leave her here? "I promise" I say after a while. I know Emma won't admit that she needs me, that she wants me.
"Pinky promise?" she tilts her hand up to my face to see it and she points her pinky out.
"Pinky promise" I say as I intertwine my pinky in hers. A smile immediately appears on her face.
Just when she's about to stand up again my phone starts to ring.
Emma.
I answer.
"Harry?" Emma's voice echoes true the phone. She says it almost in a whisper. She sounds sad. This cannot be good.
"Yes, my star? What's wrong?"
"C-can you please come?" I hear a soft sob. "I- I need you"
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First of all: HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!! (Maybe a bit late, but I don't careeee)
I wanted to update this one earlier, but I just couldn't finish it...
Also... I just HATE this chapter. absolutely HATE it! so i'm terrible sorry.
anyway, i haven't much more to say. i maybe not update these upcoming weeks, cuz i have an exam week coming up, but i hope i can make some time to write. but please don't hate me if i don't, i really need to have some good grades.
hoped you liked this part!
have a lovely day/evening
lots of loveee,
Roos :))