Ezra Montgomery
Wednesday, March 6th 2019
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──
chapter forty-three- gone girl
I HEAR FROM HER LESS AND LESS AND IT WORRIES ME. I had a habit of ruining things. I was only making Nora's life harder and now she was grounded when her and her mother were just starting to get along.
Nora's mom was not a fan of me. It was obvious, especially after the plan b incident. Nora's mom reminded me of my dad in some ways. It makes me scared, for Nora, for myself and for our future.
We hadn't been dating more than a couple days and I'd seen her less than i'd ever had in the passed few months. It felt weird and I didn't like it.
Chase makes his way beside me, where I contemplate calling Nora, staring out the window. It felt like nothing's changed these passed few months. The sun is just setting, and we've just had an awkward quiet dinner.
Chase is still purple and bruised and I can't lie it does put a smile on my face, for mere seconds. But then I remember there's not shit to smile about. I missed Nora and I just couldn't stop thinking about how things ended.
How could I make it up to her? I didn't know if I could, but I needed to try.
"You never did say thank you," Chase begins, in a low voice, clasping my shoulder like we're old buddies. It's hard not to react with violence, when this is really all his fault in the first place.
"Chase, if I were you...i'd really tread carefully. You still haven't recovered from the last time." I say.
"Watch your mouth." I keep my cool. My mother is in the next room packing away leftovers that she didn't cook. I hear her hum, hair escaping her ponytail, cheeks rosey pink, probably buzzed from wine.
She doesn't deserve it, i've put everyone through enough. I could at least try to control my emotions.
Chase smiles, leaning against the glass of the window. "Your girlfriend had a weird car phobia, and I was the one to get her to drive, you couldn't do that, so you should thank me."
His hand fill the pockets of his khakis as he wears his white button down two buttons too low, i've never known a bigger douche than him.
It does piss me off that it was him, why him? It should be me to help her, to be there, to listen. It's just like Chase to swoop in and ruin things.
I missed my girlfriend and I wanted to beat Chase to a bloodied pulp again. I didn't even have peace at home now, now Nora was my only sliver of joy and peace and I couldn't even have that.
"Just stay away from my girlfriend and me."
He says nothing, just shrugs like he hasn't quite decided. It would be kinda hard since he was only down the hall. But i'm pretty sure the next fight we had someone would probably die.
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──
My phone rings waking me up out of slumber. I wake dazed and confused, unsure of the time, room encompassed with darkness. It's Nora and it's early morning.
"Morning," Her golden honey voice says, in my ear. It almost puts me back to sleep, calming me. God how I missed that voice.
"Hi, gorgeous."
She's silent, but I hear her smiling through the phone.
"My mom won't let me have my phone after school, and she's making me come straight home too." Her voice is somber and sad suddenly. She wasn't okay, not really, of course she wasn't. Why would I think I could solve her sadness when I couldn't even solve my own?
"Can I walk you home after school?" I ask trying to sound less groggy, I wanted to be awake to talk to her. I sit up, the covers fall to my waist and leave my bare chest exposed to the cool morning air.
"Yeah, I'd like that." She's quiet after.
"You there?"
"Mhm," I hear her say, but she sounds half asleep.
The pill she took probably took a toll on her body, I should be there to give her cuddles and kisses, but instead she was alone because of me and my actions.
"I love you." I tell her because I don't say it enough. It's still scary to be that vulnerable, to express your feelings with words so trivial.
I say I love you in different ways, before i'd even uttered them to Nora, i'd been saying them. When I pulled her hair to see that cute reaction she'd make, scrunching her nose frowning up at me or when I gave away my favorite hoodie or walked just about everywhere in the goddamn city because that's what she wanted. I didn't mind, that's how I knew, all along i'd been saying and feeling it.
"I love you too." I'll never get tired of hearing her say that.
"Well i've gotta go Ezzie, I hope you have a better day than i'm gonna have." It's meant as a joke, but it makes me feel like shit.
"I'm so sorry, everything will settle, eventually."
"I know." she almost sounds hopeful.
She hangs up and I climb from my bed feeling a permanent sense of guilt. Before I know what i'm doing, I reach into my nightstand where I find my emergency stash of Marlboro Reds. I know they're cheap disgusting things, but I always liked the taste.
I hadn't smoked one in about six months. I pulled one out, rolling it between my index and thumb. A black coffee would go nicely with this. The stress was eating me again, like it did last summer and fall and winter and since I was thirteen.
It only got worse, it always came back tenfold. I grabbed a lighter and made a coffee and headed for the roof.
The sun was rising and the view was breathtaking, but I felt so terrible. I lit my cigarette and took a drag. Eyes closed, in through my mouth out through my nose. Again and again, I left the pack in my room, a choice I intentionally made.
I look over the ledge at the bottom. What if I jumped? I couldn't mess that up, it'd be easy and no backing down once I was free falling there would be no one to save me.
But then who would walk Nora home after school?
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──
School grows more and more unbearable as the weeks pass and the seasons change.
"She really really wants you bro." Chad whispers from beside me, disrupting my note taking. "She is eye fucking you from across the room."
I look up from my chain to him, to the chain again. It says Nora, does nobody look at it? It was visible through my uniform, I'd went without a tie, because the weather would be warmer today. It poked through my collar, clear as day.
"I have a girlfriend." I turn to Chad, but he's still looking at the front near the teachers desk, where the blonde girl stands.
"Yeah he's whipped, he's not going for that." Chance adds, sitting on my opposite side.
"So you don't mind if I go for that?" Chad smirks.
"Dude," I say, to make it clear to him. "Go for it."
"Don't bother, she's obsessed with Ezra." Chance begins, as we all stare at the girl as she carries a hall pass, to interrupt our class to speak with our teacher.
"I can fix her."
I tune them out, doodling in my notebook. Lunch was an hour ago, so the school day was almost done, finally. That meant i'd see Nora soon, it put a small smile on my face, until I heard my teacher call my name.
The quiet chatter amongst the class dies out as everyone stares at me. "Ezra, to the Dean's office." She points her pen at me, from beneath her glasses and gestures for me to follow the blonde girl.
Chance and Chad exchange glances before snickering like idiots. I rise gathering my things. What the fuck did the dean want with me?
She doesn't say anything until we're in the hall, she turns to me, hair whipping me, slightly. She blushes, looking up at me.
"The dean didn't really want you, I just.... wanted to talk to you." She's staring down at her feet, shyly. She then looks up to examine me with her blue eyes, slow.
She's giving me a headache, she won't stop harassing me. I throw my book bag over my shoulder looking up to the ceiling for composure before proceeding so not to crush this girl too hard, but she had to get the message.
"Listen, whatever your name is." I begin. "I will never be interested so just stay away from me and my friends, you're acting like a stalker now."
She looks hurt, but there's still a longing in her eyes.
"I'll never stop, Ezra." she says teary eyed, her white face is blotched and red.
"I waited my turn, I waited for you to grow tired of Astrid and now you're with...you're with—"
She's balling now.
"Nora." I finish for her. "I'm with Nora."
"What Nora doesn't know won't hurt her, right?" Her tears are silent and her voice sounds lower now.
"Nora still doesn't know why you were at the club that night, does she?" She continues, prying.
I ignore her walking away. She was nothing, but trouble, I shouldn't even waste anymore words on her.
"Names Heather for the third time." She calls. "Heather Oberlin." She adds.
Dean Oberlin was her dad. That explains why she gets to dress the way she does. I continue to ignore her all the way out the school as I leave early to see my girlfriend.
I walk swiftly to her school, it's not far, but I want to be early. I walk fast, through the traffic, my long legs help.
It's not long until i'm at the front gate of her school, I feel like a parent waiting for their kid. I rest my back on the gates, staring up at the cloudy sky. It looked like rain and I didn't have an umbrella.
Nora is frowning as she exits the school, I see it. She looks so upset. When she notices me she smiles bright. She looks beautiful, she wears a white t shirt, with grey sweatpants and Ugg's. I envied her for not having a uniform.
She says nothing, only pulls me in by the shirt and kisses me hungry, running her fingers through my hair. She leans pressed against the front gate of her school, kissing me, her lips tell me hello.
The world stops around us and I don't even care if her classmates see, let them.
She's still gripping my shirt firm and I can feel her breast pressed against my chest. Her tight white shirt isn't helping, or her soft lips or the way her hair is in two pig tails styled adorably.
And she's looking up at me now with those eyes, she pulls away breathing heavy. Her eyes so chocolate, even in the greying afternoon. The wind blows as the clouds grow darker and darker. There's a sound of rumbling thunder.
Nora looks shy, suddenly. I smile, I still made her nervous? She still made me nervous too.
"What is it?" She was adorable to me when she got all shy and quiet, she tries looking away, but I tilt her head back up to my eyes.
She was all, but squirming now, I still had her pinned to the gate, arm resting slightly beside her head, looking down at her, she wasn't going anywhere. She bit her lip, too nervous to talk. Her hair blew wild, from the weather rolling in.
"Tell me," I take her hand so we can begin walking, so not to get caught in the rain.
"I want to—" she trails off, looking up at me, nudging my side. "You know?"
"I don't." I bust out laughing, because I don't know why she's talking in code. She huffs, trying to release my hand, frustrated. I only hold on tighter.
"Okay, then what, tell me, Nora." I say. "I really want to know."
Before she can answer it starts pouring. Neither of us have umbrellas so we walk the rest of the five minutes in the rain laughing the whole way like idiots.
We hold hands, running to her front door. Nora nearly falls, running up her steps, to unlock the door, but, I grab her waist and she pauses, looking down at me. We stop laughing, but Nora's mouth is still open like she's going to say something.
The rain is so loud around us, but it feels good, like a cleanse. We were both washing the day off. I could see Nora's bra through her shirt.
We stare at each other, both hungry for each other getting soaked on, sexual tension high. My hand was still on her waist, grounding her, everything was wet all around.
She moves wets strands of hair out of my eye, smiling small to herself, concentrating. I grab her hand mid swipe firmly, she looks surprised.
"Ezra—"
I lean down to kiss her because it's what we both want, neither of us have to have say it. The kiss is wet and I rest a thumb beside her lips, opening them wider to get a better taste of her. I couldn't get enough of her. More more more.
She clings to me, much like her shirt clings to her. Her hair curls from the water. And I hear her moan through the roar of the showers.
"Let's go inside." Her voice is nearly drowned out by the rain.
She unlocks the door, turning a light on. I can't stop looking at her she looks gorgeous, her hot pink bra is poking out from me exploring her body and she still has a look of shyness in her eyes.
I move forward, taking her hand, guiding her to her room. "Is this okay?"
"Is what?" She asks, looking back at me with those eyes.
"My mom will get home later because of the rain." She adds, opening her bedroom door, closing it behind us.
I close the gap between us, pulling her shirt off. She looks up at me, taking her bra off, exposing her breast to me.
I continue to kiss her and her neck, and down her collarbone, sucking her nipples making her gasp quietly, under breath. She combs fingers through my wet hair, as I continue.
We both freeze at the sound of keys. Nora steps back wide eyed, pulling a shirt on, from her bed.
"I should go," I say, lingering onto her hand, intertwining our fingers.
Nora sighs, saddened. "It's all rainy out."
I give her a hug before I climb out her window into the rainy afternoon.
I don't see or hear from her much after that, only in the mornings or during the school day, sometimes she lets me walk her home, sometimes I have to drop her off a block away if her mom's home.
It sucked, it was like she was gone. Each brief encounter felt shorter and farther apart from the last.
a/n
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