Everything was coated in white and it was freezing cold as Eli grabbed the hot drink Rowan had given him. It had been several hectic months, but once it snowed everything had calmed down and he found himself spending more time inside than he did outside.
There was a lot of time that he spent alone just thinking. The dull ache in his heart was slowly going away until it was easily forgotten, but one had still persisted.
Now that the snow was slowly melting away and they could walk around without slipping on anything, Eli got surprising news from Rowan. News that he didn't expect, and he didn't know how to feel about it. He almost refused to go with her.
Because as far as they both knew, Ari had been secretly seeing someone and his situation had been complicated. Even when Eli asked Rowan about it, she didn't know much and claimed that Ari rarely brought up anything related to that mystery person. All they knew was that he is a guy, and apparently, he was also Ari's mate.
The first time he learned about this, Eli was devastated.
Being in love with someone was never an easy thing, and he slowly found himself realizing that he loved Ari only to find out that their situation was hopeless from the beginning. Eli had been in a relationship with Alec at the time, his own mate, and it didn't help that the both of them were omegas. Even Cassie didn't sound so optimistic when he raised the possibility of them being together.
Instead she gently told him that it was not something that was going to last, and he refused to accept it at first.
But then Ari left, and all that was left between them were occasional calls and texts that helped them maintain the friendship they had, yet allowed for Eli's feelings to die down a bit. Eli's love for Ari became a dull flame in his heart, and while it kept burning, it struggled to remain aflame.
And now Ari was back because Rowan had asked him to visit, and Eli found himself terrified of reigniting that flame. He was also terrified of the pain he felt when he knew Ari was in love with someone else, that he had a mate and was marked already – he had to be, it has been months.
But when he finally saw him sitting there, the flame remained a dull one.
Even when he smiled that beautifully captivating smile of his, one that would usually make his breath get caught in his throat, Eli didn't feel anything more than what he was feeling. They grew apart.
Yet there was still a dull ache in his heart, it never left.
"It's good to see you." Eli smiled warming up his hands with his hot drink, and Rowan sat beside him with a drink of her own. "We really missed you. How's everything?"
Nobody knows if the redness in Ari's face was because of the cold or something else, but Eli knew then that Ari was never in love with him. "Everything is great."
Eli was surprised to find himself genuinely happy to hear that.
"At least you texted this time." Rowan said looking at him fondly, but was still shaking her head at her friend's habit of disappearing out of nowhere. "I really miss our bake and talks. Eli here is atrocious at baking."
Even when he tried to look offended, Eli couldn't help but smile when Ari let out a laugh. The conversations that followed made them fall into a comfortable joyful mood, that is until one of Eli's stray glances caught sight of something that made him go still.
Rowan was talking about something funny, but Eli wasn't listening.
A kick to his feet made him look up at Ari who looked at him as if he knew what just happened, and his next words proved to him that he did. "Maybe you should sort things out."
"What things?" Rowan asked cluelessly, not that interested in knowing. So when she only got a shrug from Ari and an averted gaze from Eli, she didn't bother to ask as she allowed herself to enjoy the warmth from her drink.
"It's about time, yeah. I'll see you two later." Eli said standing up from his seat already heading to the door. It surprised Rowan, but she was quickly distracted by Ari who diverted her attention from the whole thing.
The last thing Eli heard was their happy chatter as he felt the cold air hit him when he pushed open the door, and suddenly he found himself chasing after someone he's been avoiding the past few months finally realizing why he was doing it.
Eli wasn't avoiding Alec because they were exes, but because it ached whenever Eli was reminded that they were not together whenever he saw him. This dull ache persisted, and there was a reason for why it did.
"Ale-" It came out weakly, and his heart was thudding in his chest as it ached, and he immediately regretted ever being there when nervousness set in as his voice went away. What if Alec got angry with him? What if he doesn't want to see him anymore?
What if he stopped loving him?
Those worries quickly vanished when Alec turned around to face him, and he looked as if he couldn't believe it was Eli who called for him. Seeing no anger or disdain in his expression, Eli felt braver as he approached him, swallowing his nerves away.
"Hi."
A small smile appeared on Alec's face. "Hello."
And the dull ache wasn't so dull anymore, Eli felt like his heart was being squeezed so hard he almost let out an audible reaction. But he didn't, and instead he bit it back and tried to utter words without stuttering them. The problem is, he didn't know how to start.
The first thing that came to his mind was an apology. "I'm sorry."
He was apologizing for many things all at once.
For breaking his heart, for leaving him, and for making him go through all that pain despite them both knowing that they were the ones who were chosen as mates. Not everyone is so lucky to find theirs, and Eli so recklessly threw that away to chase someone else. It felt so real, but so did his conflicting feelings.
And now Eli knew what went wrong.
"You have nothing to be sorry for." Alec sighed, but he did try to smile, and for some reason he didn't look like he was hoping for more. Something about the acceptance he was showing made Eli feel worse. "I heard he's back. Did you go see him?"
They both knew he was talking about Ari.
"I was with him just now." Eli answered him quickly, almost in an indifferent manner, and he was quick to follow up with what he really wanted to say. "Would you say yes if I asked you on a date right now?"
If Eli knew just how smitten Alec always was by him, he wouldn't have asked so nervously. It made Alec's eyes widen in surprise not expecting that. They haven't spoken in so long.
And now Eli was talking to him again, asking him on a date.
And he had just been with Ari moments ago.
"I would, yes."
Eli breathed out in relief as if there was any way Alec would have rejected him, and then he awkwardly smiled as if he wasn't supposed to. As if they weren't yet friendly enough for it to happen, but when Alec looked down at him with a fond look at that smile, he almost choked.
Alec was looking at him as if he was in love with him.
It wasn't the fascination and electrified wonder that came with being mates, it wasn't like the excitement and infatuation that they had before, it was a lot more than that. That's when Eli realized that Alec had waited for him, but also let him go.
And only someone who truly loved would ever do that.
"Let's take it slow." Eli told him because that's what he wanted, he wanted to know him before they go any further. No more heated kisses and lustful touches, just slow meaningful ones were enough for now.
"Sure, yeah. Slow is good." Alec agreed wanting nothing more than to just keep him by his side, that was all what he cared about, nothing else. It was bearable when Eli was nobody's, but it'll be perfect now that he is slowly becoming his once more. "How about going on that date now? I am free now."
"Yes, ok." Eli answered a bit too quickly, but he didn't care. The dull ache in his heart went away, and things are starting to get better. Things are just as they should be. "Now is perfect."
And when Alec offered his hand, Eli didn't hesitate to take it in his.
Because Eli might have been naïve, and he did make a lot of mistakes in their relationship, but so did Alec. They both dived in too fast, too hard, and it led to many unfortunate outcomes. But now they were slower, more careful, and Alec was patiently walking alongside the inexperienced Eli through this relationship.
And this time they both meant for it to last.