Most things that happened last night are now a blurry memory, the only thing I was sure about is that I came to the Salvatore house and saw Anna.
She was speaking to me full of love and I still remember how my heart was aching because of how kind this woman is.
I woke up next to her, my arms wrapped around her warm body that looks so small compared to mine, this is a thing that I would enjoy experiencing every morning.
Her curly black hair was spread on my chest and covering half of her pale face, she looked calm and at peace. I only wished to make her able to experience that forever instead of taking away each moment of relaxment that she is able to have.
A small smile was planted on her lips as she slept, her dreams must be much better than the cruel reality that we are both stuck in and if I could make her dreams come true just to see that smile again, I would.
I have never imagined myself being like this over a woman, to me, the only thing they brought was pain and suffering. Unconrresponded love that broke people's hearts into small pieces that could never be collected again.
But here I am, giving up on everything I once believed as I'm falling in love with the woman in my arms, ignoring all of the things that I've been told about love my whole life and giving all that I have to give, to Anna.
Even if one day she gets tired of me and breaks me into pieces, she already has the power to do that and only doesn't know it yet. I know that at least I tried and figured out that the heart of a monster can in fact love.
I could feel her soft breaths on my chest, as her own went up and down with each one of them, a peaceful pattern that was keeping her alive.
Anna Salvatore.
That's the name of the woman who is making me believe in love once more, Yoru once said that she was like this with Stefano as well and now they're one of the most powerful couples in the whole mafia.
Also, before my mother died when I was younger, she told me that one day I would find someone that would take care of me and love me like I deserve to be loved. She told me that I shouldn't look down at myself and see me as someone who is not capable of being loved.
My mother made me have hope that one day someone would come my way and make my heart beat faster in a way that no one else had managed to do, someone who would explore the world with me and make stories that we would one day tell our kids.
Now I believe that the person my dear mother was talking about, is Anna.
The way she makes my heart beat just from the sigh of her, the way I can't help but look at her when she's next to me, the way it brings me joy to be holding her in my arms.
I believe she is the one.
And even if she doesn't feel the same for me, I believe that I'll forever love her anyway and take care of her when she needs it.
That, until she finds the one for her, someone who will make her feel the same way that she makes me feel.
Anna started moving around slightly, her small hand gripping on my shirt as if she didn't want to let go of me, which I hope she doesn't, her right leg is now over my torso and her head fell to my arm.
The height difference between us makes it easy for her to use me as a pillow.
▬
We came down to the kitchen once Anna had finally woken up, she still looked tired and even though she was trying to hide it, the darkness under her eyes and the constant yawning was giving it all away.
She was silently eating the pancakes that we had made together, our clothes being full of flour and all other ingredients that we messed ourselves with.
Anna looked happy, as her eyes shone even though she was only focused on eating her pancake with chocolate topping.
That was put on twice.
"Do you think I exaggerated the chocolate?" She whispers giggling slightly at the end of the sentence, her Italian accent being much more noticeable now than it usually is.
"You decide how much chocolate you put in." I shrug, not judging her for what she did since I did the exact same thing.
"Yeah that's why I'm fat now," Anna looks down at her stomach and pokes it, a smile still on her face but her voice was emitting sadness.
"You're not fat, dear."
"I am, you're just saying that so that I feel good about myself," She looks at me with a sad smile planted on her lips. "People tend to do that a lot." Anna nodded to herself.
The way she sees her body is way far from what's true, her flat stomach and accentuated curves are perfect in their own way and it's something that is only hers. Her body is only hers to take care of and love.
It hurt me, knowing that she was not able to see how perfect she truly is, from head to toe, the universe does have it's favorites.
At the ball, many will try to talk to her and manipulate her so I have to make sure to be beside her at all times so that nothing bad happens to her. Yoru and Akira will most likely help as well as her parents will probably be too busy making business with other mafias.
Her beauty will most likely attract a lot of people, the crown signaling that she is a Salvatore is going to make things even worse, and her black vests because she is with me will be the combo that will make all eyes lay on her.
Anna stood up and placed her plate on the sink, her soft steps couldn't be heard as she softly walked and sat on the counter, right next to where I was sitting. Her feet were swinging back and forth as she bit her bottom lip.
Her eyes were focused on the window in front of her, she looked lost in thought as she was playing with her hands.
"What are you thinking about?" I decided to ask, curious to know what was going on in that little mind of hers.
Anna shrugs as she slowly turns her head to me and connects her eyes with mine, her soft but intense gaze not leaving mine as we maintain eye contact for who knows how long.
"I don't know," she whispers softly.
But her eyes told that she was confused about something that was going to happen next, as her dark brown eyebrows frowned and the shine in her eyes faded slightly.
Anna wanted answers for questions that her pink lips couldn't manage to ask, she wasn't brave enough yet but one day all of that shyness is going to disappear and she is going to be able to clear all of her doubts.
If she isn't careful enough she will end up figuring out things that she doesn't want to, nor her little mind is prepared to know the true cruelty of this world.
"It 's confusing." She sighs as her hand makes its way to her forehead, rubbing it slightly before tilting her head to look at me. "Even I can't put it into words."
"That's normal, don't worry about it." Not being able to express feelings it's something that I've been used to for so damn long.
It's slightly overwhelming when you want to get it all out but you can't manage to put what you're feeling into words.
"We're gonna train today right?" She asks, totally showing that she didn't want the conversation to go that way.
"Yes we are, so go get ready I'll be waiting for you downstairs." She jumps from the counter as I stand up from the chair. "I assume you already know the way." A smile makes its way to her lips as she nods, sometimes Anna acts like a 5-year-old child, it's amusing.
The noirette girl runs upstairs as I make my way to the training base, I should probably teach her how to punch and all of that, things that will hurt me and not her.
If we trained with the katanas she was most likely to get cut in the way, and I don't want that to happen.
▬
I open the door to the base just to find Yoru and Akira sitting there and talking with each other, their giggles filling the room as they speak loudly.
Yoru has been coming over much more since the first time she has ever come to the Salvatore mansion, she's probably enjoying the fact that now she can come in whenever she wants since she's friends with Anna.
"Oh hey kid" Yoru greets, standing up from the ring to come and hug me.
"Hey old lady."
"Where's Anna?"
"She went upstairs to get herself dressed, she'll be here in a bit" I tell her as I prepare everything.
"She uses katanas right?" Yoru asks as she grabs her katanas from the counter.
"Yes."
"Can I train her?-"She gets interrupted mid sentence
"No."
"Oh come on Giovanni! I won't hurt her and there's no one better than me when it comes to katanas." She pounds, crossing her arms in front of her face as she pulls out her bottom lip.
"You might do it on accident, even I do." I sigh.
"I don't hurt people I like." She says with a serious look.
And I knew she was speaking the truth, Yoru is one of the most deadly people that the mafia has ever seen but when it comes to people that she actually likes, she's unable to hurt them, even if they hurt them.
We all have that thing that is going to lead us to an end don't we?
"I'll let you do it this once." I sigh in defeat as I let myself sit next to Akira.
"I'm gonna love watching this." She says as she lays back with a smile on her face and a bag of cookies in her hand.
i'm already hating it.
sorry i took so long <3