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Project Ovactavion @omlwriter3

Reviewer- cwang1

Pros:

I really like your reader interaction, especially in the beginning. You added questions that keep the reader thinking, and also help the reader understand the character.

I really like your description, especially of characters and scenes.

Your diction really suits the scene, and, as a reader, I was able to picture the scenes very clearly.

I really liked how your writing is quite realistic; the characters have thoughts that I would definitely have, and they act like real humans. The way you build your story makes it seem very realistic.

I really liked your smooth use of cliffhangers. The way you did it was really amazing, and definitely left the reader hanging.

Cons:

For your cover, the title kind of blends into the background. Perhaps try using a different color and making it pop more. Additionally, you could try adding more to your cover, like different elements or graphics, rather than just one picture.

I saw a few grammatical mistakes in your blurb. For example, the word "meet" was capitalized when it shouldn't be. Additionally, the sentence "an experiment since he can remember, he hasn't had much of a good life" is a run-on sentence. Consider changing the comma to a semicolon or period.

I thought that your blurb was a bit vague. On my first read, I thought it was confusing, and couldn't really understand it. I recommend adding more to your blurb, and perhaps elaborating on Project Ovactavion.   I think that you should use the dialogue to move the plot along more, and perhaps add more dialogue. Right now, a lot of your text is thoughts from the narrator, so I would recommend adding more interaction between characters, especially through dialogue. Additionally, try to use the dialogue to move the plot forward or add to the plot and build characters.

I would recommend making your chapters longer. The recommended amount is between 1000 and 2000 words, so try to stay in that range.