Coincidental Mess @cherry_blossom76

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Reviewer- cwang1

Pros:

I liked how your blurb had some very interesting quotes that definitely drew me in. For example, the last line, "when everything is done mistakenly right," really piqued my curiosity, and made me want to read on.

I thought that you were able to combine just the right amount of descriptive vocabulary into your writing so that your descriptions were quite vivid, without carrying the reader too far.

I really loved the plot and the cliffhangers you employed. The way you transitioned into them was very smooth, and the next chapters were also transitioned into smoothly.

I thought that the plot was very fleshed out, and I definitely enjoyed reading your book!

I also liked how your dialogue really added to the plot and added to the story. This is really hard to do, so good job on that!

Cons:

For your cover, try avoiding blending the text color in with the background. Right now, it is very hard to see the "by cherry_blossom76," so I would recommend making it a different color or placing it somewhere else.

Also, your blurb is very short, so I would recommend providing more context, description, or dialogue, just to hook the reader in.

I would recommend changing up your sentence structure, and varying it across sentences. This gives variety in your writing and helps keep the reader engaged.

Right now, a lot of your sentences have the same or similar structures, so I would recommend changing that.

I did spot a few places where you used punctuation that didn't really fit the occasion. For example, at one point you used a semicolon and ellipsis where they are not needed. I would just recommend checking over your writing to ensure that small mistakes like these are fixed.

I would recommend not using too much repetition, like using 3 "and" in a row. Instead, try to just separate the list using commas, and one final "and" at the end.

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