Reviewer: cwang1
Pros:
What an amazing title and cover! I love both of them, and they definitely give me a good first impression.
I liked how you had quite a bit of dialogue! It really added to the story and made me see how the characters interact better.
I really liked how you developed the backstory of the characters and why they did the things that they did. This really made the story interesting.
Cons:
I did spot a few mistakes here and there, so I would recommend going back and fixing that. Additionally, some of your writing did seem to flow a bit randomly, so I would suggest making more clear connection between paragraphs.
I would recommend using a more expansive vocabulary as, as of right now, most of the vocabulary is pretty basic and that makes the writing a bit bland.
I would recommend perhaps having more interesting chapter endings that really make the readers want to read the next chapter.
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