𝐔𝐍𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐃

16 | fickle minded heart

Jimin's POV

After that whole fiasco with Nox at Sam's apartment, I leave his place utterly tense and frustrated. The relaxation I once felt caused by my neighbor's healing hands has quickly been replaced by the smothering weights and anxiety that overwhelmed my muscles. I get that I must have been incredibly jumpy during the massage session, but isn't it her job to be professional? Maybe she should have just kept her mouth shut, because every time she opens it, a heated argument starts out of nowhere and the next thing you know, you blow up. 

A huge part of me is just feeling incredibly embarrassed because I literally had a fucking boner in front of her. You could see my fucking dick lifting the damn towel and in that moment I could feel my heart beat faster than a hummingbird. All I could think about is that her hands could feel my reactions. They could feel my temperature rising by the second, my sweat coursing on my skin. They could feel my palpitating heart. Not only that, she could also witness my chest heaving up and down like a fucking compressor and hear my panting. 

Despite how relaxed I was on that massage chair, I honestly can't comprehend how other people do this kind of thing. Don't they feel the slightest bit embarassed having another person literally feel every single physical reaction their body makes on it's own accord? I know that this kind of thing is concidered normal, since she needs to massage a number of people a day, but still...

If I'm being honest, at first I wasn't feeling uncomfortable about the idea. But for some reason my heart picked up when I saw Nox in Sam's room. She was a tad awkward but nice in the beginning while trying to maintain her professionalism. 

She even asked me about my allergies in order to know which oils to use.

However, I can't help but feel guilty for yelling at her and I'm angry at myself for being so weak minded. The reason why I can't get rid of my guilt is because I know things about her that I shouldn't. I might not be familiar with all the details, but I do know about Elijah abusing her. I just happened to find out when Yoongi told me on my first day in the apartment and I on the other hand was getting involved in her life. What was I supposed to do the night he was lurching at the gate like a frustrated bull?

She must have been thinking that I was intruding in her life. Of course that would make her feel uncomfortable. 

How fucking stupid am I?

Nox probably thinks I'm a creep and frankly I don't blame her.

Maybe I should mind my own damn business.

With one hand on the steering wheel, I reach out for my cell on the passenger' seat and speed dial Yoongi's number. At this hour he's either editing his gaming video or he's probably smoking weed in his bathtub now that Nox isn't in the building. 

He picks it up on the first ring. "Yo, what's up?"

"Wanna go for a drink at the Jaded Sage?" I ask, my eyes focusing on the mainroad.

"With you it's never one drink Seven," he snickers and I groan. "Seriously though that shit hole? It reeks of smoke and cigars."

"It's no different than your room."

"That's because I've grown accustomed to sleeping in my own filth."

I roll my eyes at his slimy remark then take a turn at the next green light. "Whatever. You coming?"

"Sure thing sport." He says. "Be there in ten."

The Jaded Sage is a bar located close to uni. You can take one mere glance at it and you know that this isn't the place for you. Starting from the layers of paint and graffiti with meaningless slogans written by people who think they're being rebellious when in reality all they do is damage public property and design rather desecrated depicitons of the female anatomy. Those same walls reek of piss and ammonia so you immediately know what you're getting yourself into. Then follows the neon green sign of the scripted letters of the bar where most of the letters flicker because of fluctuation in the total buildings' voltage. There are times when the lighting inside the bar dims down from time to time, but that doesn't seem to bother most people.