Unseen Scars (L.T.Y)

16

"Ever since you came here I haven't been able to get you off my mind. I haven't frowned. When I look at you my stress is washed away. Your smile heals me. Your eyes give me a reason to live. Your lips bring the colour back into my life. My life had turned black and white. I had nothing but you came in. Everything just made sense. You gave me a reason to smile. You are my happiness. So seeing you here. Laying down on a hospital bed in pain...I feel hurt...my heart breaks every time I see you here. So just wake up. Wake up so I can tell you how much I love you"

I love you too

"Even though you can't see me...I'm in pain. I regret it. I regret going through your phone. I also regret that time when I said we'd continue later. I should have just ignored Doyoung and...made love to you."

Even though I can't see him I can just imagine the smile on his face.

"I should have been honest with you from day 1. But I was scared. I was scared that you'd break my heart. Like her. I thought you were like her. I know I'm wrong because you are nothing like Min-"

I heard the door open at the worst time possible. He was about to say her name. But some bitch just had to open the door.

"Is she doing any better?" I think I hear Yangyang's voice. I hear a bunch of steps entering the room. I assume all the members are her other than the dreamies.

"I don't know." Taeyong's tone was back to the painful one.

"We all came hoping she was awake" I hear Xiaojun say.

"Well she isn't"

"Did you know?" Lucas asked to who I assume was Taeyong.

"What?" Taeyong said with a cold tone.

"Her getting....raped" Lucas's voice had regret in it.

"Yea. I recently found out" His voice held something that made me want to kiss him and I couldn't grip this feeling he was giving me. He made me feel like a teenager in love. Hearing his voice makes me want to see his face. But I can't feel myself. I just want to see him. My eyes are sick of this darkness. My eyes crave his presence. I want to see myself through his eyes.

"And I found out the wrong way"

I don't even care if he did something wrong. He thought I hated him when in reality I'm in love with him. My body darted upwards as I realized what I just thought about I'm in love with him. My eyes open wide just to see 15 pairs of eyes on me. The moment I saw Taeyong my eyes sparkled, a smile formed on my face. I quickly got out of the bed so I could get into his embrace but my legs were too weak that the only embrace I got was the floors.

"Y/N!" Taeyong yelled as he rushed to help me. He started asking me a few questions but I couldn't hear them I was too lost in his eyes. His hands snaked around my body, carrying me in bridal style. Sending blush to my cheeks.

He lays me back down on the bed. Before he could get back up our eyes lock. Half of his body was hovering over me. My hand slowly makes it's way to his cheek. A light shade of red creeps onto his cheeks as our skin touches. He starts to lean in as his hands make their way to my hips. I lean in, lips inches away from each other-

"Cough fucking cough there's 14 people watching you" Yuta scoffs.

Taeyong quickly backs away from me. I'm a bit disappointed but what was I expecting, they were making a big deal of a hug with Yangyang and here I am expecting a kiss in front of them. I mentally smack myself at my stupidity.

"We weren't doing anything" Taeyong exclaims. A frown forms on my face but it's not big enough for them to notice.

"Y/N are you okay?" Taeil asks worried for me while the boys argue.

"Yea..."

"We're sorry" Johnny speaks up. The most unexpected person apologizes to me.

"For what?" I knew what they were talking about but I wanted to hear it for him. From them.

"We didn't know so we did things we shouldn't have done" His voice was low but soft it was as if he was shy from apologizing. Like it was his first time saying sorry to a girl.

"We flirted with you, we dared you to make out with Yangyang and all the other small things. And I'm really sorry for what I did." Lucas says with sincerity.

"It's okay" I smile in return.

"So...Taeyong will be staying here to help you until you get discharged." My eyes open wide in shock. He's going to sleep here and help me. I tried to think about everything we could do but the only thought that occurred was 'It's a hospital get a grip of yourself'.

"When will I get discharged" It wasn't a question I really wanted to ask but there was an awkward silence and I hate it. Everyone hates the awkward silence.

"2 weeks" Ten answers.

"WHAT! Why so long?" Normally it would be a few days. I was expecting 2 days since I just passed out and that isn't a big deal.

"You went into a short coma from you trauma. They said there could be side effects so they need to keep you here just in case." Kun answers my question.

"Is there anything wrong with me?"

"No. It's because of what happened."Taeil reassures me.

"Y/N can we ask you something?" Xiaojun asks.

"Sure," I said with a smile.

"What happened to you that day?" I thought they would respect my privacy after everything got out but they still want to know. I got raped. That's it. I'm not telling anyone the details cause that makes me do things, feel things I shouldn't be doing nor feeling.

"Are you guys gonna leave" My tone was cold and harsh. What once was a smile was now an emotionless face.

The guys look at me with guilt and pity looks some were waving and others just left. A deep sigh leaves my mouth as I think about that horrifying day.

"Don't get used to them. Don't trust them. Cause I can't make that mistake again." I say to myself. I look around and realize I'm not alone.

"Y/N. I understand you. I know life is so fucking hard but talk to me. Tell me what happened I can help you. I know how you feel. You think your whole life is ruined. That there will never be anyone for you. You want to be quiet but you talk. You want to die but you smile. You say you're okay but you're dead inside. I wish I had someone to talk to when I was rock bottom. When I thought I didn't need anyone. If you talk to me...I can help you."

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"Can you remember who you were,

before the world told you who you should be"