Until We Lose Ourselves

31

Jonah moved to between Eden's legs. From atop the counter, she grinned into the kiss.

Jonah pulled apart for a moment, resting his head against hers. He wanted her so much. He wanted to call her his, and to be hers. He wanted to be with her. But he was afraid. Afraid of losing her, afraid of destroying what was.

Eden almost asked him. She almost asked if he felt anything for her. She almost told him she wanted to be with him. She almost lost control over herself, but gained it back, when her phone rang.

Jonah groaned as she pushed him away to get it. The caller was Winona. Eden's eyes widened. Winona almost never reached her herself. Marie delivered all the messages, but not this time.

Eden picked up the call. "Hello."

"Eden. Marie informed me of how you were doing. I'm calling to make sure you are past it."

"I mean... Yeah, I am putting it behind me. Then?"

"I've got a script. The shooting is year long and in the UK. You'll leave by a flight Sunday night. I'll send Marie to hand in the script. Alright?" Winona's sharp voice cut through her.

Eden's eyes widened. "But-"

"You haven't been in front of a camera for ages. It's not good. And so, this show will give you what you need of a comeback."

"I..." Eden glanced over at Jonah, who stood in the kitchen.

"Yes?"

"Let me read the script first."

"Of course. You'll get it today, and you can read it and go day after tomorrow. Good day, Eden."

The call had ended.

"Well, I guess these are my last two nights here." Eden said, staring at the phone.

"What? What do you mean?" Jonah set down the pan and started to make his way to her.

"My managers decided I have had enough rest and now it's time for me to begin working again. They're sending me abroad." Eden sighed.

Jonah watched her, an overwhelming feeling took over him. "Must you leave?"

"Don't really have another choice. Seems unreal after so long." Eden chuckled half-heartedly.

"I guess we kind of forgot we had actual careers to worry about." Jonah chuckled as well, his heart suddenly feeling heavy.

"We can make the best out of these two days though." Eden said, taking both his hands in hers.

"Where are you going?"

"UK."

"And for how long?"

"Well, she said it will last year long." Eden sounded nonchalant, but she was trying to keep up the facade that nothing was wrong. It's no matter with the job. He shouldn't be with you either way. This will just make the process easier. You don't deserve him. A few weeks, and you're falling for him. It's a fucking joke. You needn't stay here longer than necessary. It will only hurt you worse.

Eden didn't let her thoughts or her feelings show on her face. She wished she was a better person. She wished he would tell her that he had feelings for her. And yet, she was thankful he didn't. It would only ruin them.

.

Jonah kept her closer than ever those two days, just as Eden tried to create distance between them. The holding back of emotions wasn't healthy for either of them, but Eden couldn't put him in a situation where he'd get hurt because of her, or herself where she'd make a mistake and lose him forever.

Eden had work to do in the last two days, before she'd be gone for an year. Sure it was possible for them to meet up during that time too, but it wasn't that simple for those two individuals. Exhausted from hiding what he felt, breaking from what he had gone through, and overly anxious over the thought that she was leaving, Jonah could barely function, though he kept up a good front. Eden worried for him, but what they had, she always knew wasn't there to last. They had an ugly beginning. Good times came among the worse. Now, it was time to move on. Perhaps they both needed time apart to heal.

"Can I at least drop you to the airport?" Jonah asked.

"No, Jonah. I don't trust you to take care of yourself on the road." Eden pursed her lips.

"Who says I'll take care of myself at home either?"

Eden sighed in an effort to show him that she didn't mind leaving all that much.

"One year is a long time." Jonah mumbled.

Eden kept her heart in stone, positive that by the time they met again, there would be nothing between them, and it would be for the better.

.

1 months later

Eden held a glass in her hand. She placed it onto the bar counter and watched the bartender refill it. She picked it up, but didn't allow herself to drown it all at once.

A man sat in front of her. Charming by his looks. He looked familiar but Eden was too drunk to remember.

"I've seen you before." He said.

"So I'm not going crazy." Eden chuckled.

"Harry. Harry Tunningstun." He held out a hand for her to shake.

"The model." She said, shaking his hand.

"Certainly. And you?"

"Eden Paris."

"The singer slash actress. I must say, I enjoy your work."

Eden smirked. "And I must say, I enjoy your photos and walks down the runway."

Harry laughed. He flipped back his brown hair, his dimples showing. "Could I buy you the next drink?"

"No. It's free for me here. I started a tab a week ago."

"Makes sense. You're drowning them as they come."

Eden laughed. The bartender came over, and Eden told him, "Come closer."

He did, confused.

Eden whispered in his ear and he moved away. With a nod, he poured them drinks again.

"So do you have any other hobbies," Eden asked, "or do you just show off your body and get the money?" The contempt was intentional. Not to the career, but to him.

"Isn't that rude of you." He took a sip. "I work as a background dancer too."

"Ah. How come you've never been on a stage with me then?"

"How come you've never sung while I walked down a runway?"

"Touché." Eden grinned.