Until We Lose Ourselves

7

"I would have liked to see you in that skirt for longer." Hade lit his cigarette.

"I couldn't dance in it." She told him.

"Sort of reasonable, but you shouldn't have disobeyed me."

"I wore it for the first few minutes."

"Not enough. Go put it on now."

Eden stared at him in surprise. "I didn't bring it."

He tsked. "You have been very naughty."

Eden chewed on her lower lip, inching away. She was very uncomfortable.

"Come her." He tried to place an arm around her waist, but she moved back. "Aw, don't pull away. You've grown so beautifully in the past six years."

His lust filled eyes drove her mad. His continued insistence made her furious.

She smelled the alcohol in his breath, he was so close.

Without thinking, she took the liquor bottle from the table and smashed it onto his head.

Blood poured out of his head as he fell to the ground. Eden moved back, her chest heaving, breathing irregularly.

She ran out of there.

.

"It was self defense, Eden!" Marie told her.

"But he could do something! If he survives, he can let anything out!"

"So what? You can't just go in there and kill him!"

Eden went silent.

"Eden." Marie said in a warning voice.

"What?"

"Don't let an evil thought enter your mind. We've gotten so much better with you. Don't make a worse mistake."

"Geez, you really think I would kill him? If I could, I would mainly torture him to make him feel how he made me-"

"Stop. Go home, get some sleep. We'll think about our next move, first thing tomorrow morning."

Eden gave a sigh of defeat, before pulling her face in her hand, anxious, frustrated, but, most of all, afraid.

.

Eden looked at herself in the floor-length mirror. Her hand went to the bottom of her shirt, and she pulled it off. At the left of her abdomen, was a word, carved onto her skin with a sharp object. SLUT.

Right above the waist band of her shorts was a tattoo. So weak, they call me strong. Behind the words were small flowers. Flowers that represented sickness.

Suddenly, she put on her clothes again and snuck out of the house. She ran until she came to the tattoo parlour. She slowly pushed the door open and there was Dennis, working on a man's tattoo.

Dennis looked at her and nodded in acknowledgment. She nodded back and waited for her turn.

This time, she had him tattoo on her, right where the word "slut" was written, a bleeding marigold. Dennis watched her questioningly, after the process. 2 am at night, and this woman had had a flower that represented jealousy and despair, etched onto her, over four letters that had seemingly been carved into her skin. And she took the pain easily.

"I studied flowers for some time, Den. You don't need to worry about me." She whispered, wiping the little blood that had come out.

Dennis watched her carefully. Then he stood up and left the shop.

Eden stayed where she was. It was a while before he came back and handed her a note.

Eden smiled. "You don't need to worry about me."

.

"Why did you take me out today?" Jonah asked.

"I thought we both could use some time away from our house mates." Eden sipped her drink.

Jonah hummed and sipped his as well. Eden sat back, comfortably inside the cafe, but grew more and more annoyed by his messy hair.

"What?" He laughed in discomfort because of her staring.

"Why can't your hair calm down?" She asked.

He ran a hand through his hair. "They've always been like this."

"I get that your fans probably love and envy it, but it's just annoying to look at."

"Why are you feuding with me over my hair now?"

Eden leaned over the table, stretching out a hand and running it through his hair in an attempt to settle it. He laughed when she realised it was hopeless. He didn't admit how much he liked fingers running over his head. She proceeded to ruffle them up and make them messier than before, before leaning back.

Jonah rolled his eyes and tried to pull them back again, but it was a lost cause.

"At least they aren't long. That wouldve been a real pain." Eden said, watching his thin fingers settle back on the table.

"It's funny though, two housemates that hated each other only weeks ago, hanging out at a cafe." He looked down.

Eden hummed. She had needed a distraction, and she was able to watch him and envy him more like this. Why does his face look so soft?

Jonah looked out the window at the other side of the cafe. "I think we have company."

Eden turned around and saw the cameras slowly approaching the front side. "Ah, shit."

"You guys wanna get out of here? I don't want that crowd inside." The cafe manager said from behind the counter.

"Do you have a back door?" Eden asked.

He rolled his eyes and gestured for them to follow him.

Eden and Jonah snuck out the back and ran off before the paparazzi made their way around.

After a while, they ran into some fans.

"Didn't you two hate each other?" One of them asked.

"We still do." Eden winked.

"Can I have a hug?" Another on asked her. Eden smiled and gave her the hug. She saw Jonah interacting with his fans as well.

"You are my queen. Jonah is trash, you don't need to back down." A fan rambled on.

Eden rolled her eyes. "It's just human decency to be nice. We share a house, I'm sure you know that."

Eden heard some stuff being said about her to Jonah as well, but didn't hear his response. Eden pursed her lips.

Once they were free, they left the area quickly, both hiding their faces. Jonah stared at the ground and Eden pulled up her green hood. Her flaming red hair were hidden, and his black curly mess was all that could be seen from the front.

"You are shorter." Jonah commented.

"Remind me again and I'll punch you."

Jonah chuckled. "So what, you are sensitive about your height?"

"Please, I'm taller than a lot of people. And don't pretend like you are so high and mighty. 5'10 isn't nearly that tall."

"I could say the same, 'cause you know, you are 5'6... so tall."

Eden shot him a quick glare as they made it to the house.