Wandering Heart | YoonJinKook ✔️

7. Stupid In Love

Seokjin's Pov:

Stupid!

That's exactly what I was, Jungkook stayed home for four days after our anniversary before he was back to his usual self. Either coming home late or not coming home at all.

I swear every time I thought he was changing, I ended up disappointing myself. I didn't understand him; it doesn't make sense, how can some be so loving, yet so unloving at the same time.

One minute he has me feeling like I am his world, and the next, I feel empty, lonely, and rejected. I was messing up at work and school because I couldn't focus on anything but him. Mr. Min had given me my first two warnings. I ordered the wrong pieces of equipment, did incorrect invoices.

Honestly, I was moments away from resigning; I was messing up someone's business due to my issues and not being able to focus. One morning I was so deep in thoughts that I drove Jae to work instead of school.

I wasn't eating properly either, I tried, but my appetite was gone completely. Recently my son made me cry so hard, he noticed that something was wrong, which shocked me, I didn't realize he could sense that I was off, but he did.

He asked, "Appa, why are you always sad?"

I choked on my words, I couldn't answer him, and I didn't want to lie to him either, so I avoided his question, by changing the subject. Something I know I should not have done, but I couldn't help it. I didn't know what to tell him. I couldn't possibly tell my child his father was the reason for my sadness, the person he idolized, I couldn't do it.

"Seokjin, can we talk?" Mr. Min surprised me by asking, taking me away from my thoughts.

"Umm, yeah, sure." I took a deep breath; I am sure he was going to fire me. This was going to be my third warning. Didn't people usually get fired after three warnings?

"Follow me."

I hung my head and followed behind him. He led us to his office and offered me a seat when we go in.

"What's going on with you?" He leaned in front of his desk, instead of sitting and looked down at me, making me feel like I was in school in the principal office.

"N-nothing, nothing is going on. I know I have been off lately, but-"

"If you are going to repeat what you told me last week, I don't want to hear it. Seokjin, I am running a business here, and I can't afford for you to mess that up, no matter how much I like you. I have worked very hard to build this, spent a lot of late nights, and long days to make it happen, so I can't lose all the sweat equity I have put into this simply because I like you and give you chances after chances to keep making mistakes."

He was right, who was I to come along and mess up his business after he had worked so hard for it, it was unfair to him and unfair to someone who desperately needed a job.

"You are right. I am sorry. You shouldn't have to deal with someone like me. I think it's best, I quit." I stood up, and he pushed me back down.

"Woah, wait a damn minute, I wasn't asking you to quit. Besides the mistakes you have been making, you are a good worker, which I am shocked by, no offense. I didn't think you would work out in this environment, but surprisingly you did. I want to give you another chance; I want to see the Seokjin I hired, the one who told me he would prove me wrong when I had doubts. I want him back.

I am not sure what's going on with you, but you seem to be getting skinnier every time I see you and-"

"Don't talk about my weight! I hear it from my husband, and I don't need to hear it from you too!" I screamed at him, and he took a step back.

"I am so sorry; I didn't mean to offend you." I felt horrible, almost immediately. I had snapped at my boss because his words reminded me of everything I was going through. I know I was losing weight, I know my husband now found me unattractive, I knew all of this, and I didn't want to hear it from someone else, especially someone who had been telling me they found me attractive.

"I-it's fine. I am sorry, I should go."

"No, don't go, talk to me for a moment. I only said that because I have been concerned about you, not because I meant something else. You are dazed out at work, you don't come to the piano room anymore, even when I am playing the song I thought you like. I am just worried that's all, I didn't want to offend you in any way, and I am sorry if I did that.

I don't know what's your husband reason for telling you this, but I am saying it because I care."

I looked at him and shake my head, "you care? Mr. Min, with all due respect, I don't think you care about me. You don't know me enough to care about me; all you ever do is flirt with me. Probably because you want to have sex with me, and then, what? You toss me to the side, or fire me, right? Then I am left feeling guilty for cheating in my marriage, which would be caused by you."

Mr. Min smirks and walks around his desk, taking a seat. "Call me, Yoongi, please. I think with this level of conversation, it's best we be on a first-name basis rather than the unnecessary formalities. First, you assume I don't care because maybe your definition of someone caring differs from mines. Yes, you are correct, I do flirt with you, and would I have sex with you if the opportunity presents itself. Like I told you from the beginning, and it remains the same, I find you extremely attractive, you turn me without doing anything.

I have had some immoral thoughts about you, thoughts I could probably get in trouble for should you ever decide to report me. But, you are wrong to think I would toss you to the side, that's not my style. I am an honest guy, whether you want to believe it or not. If I see you as a one night stand, I would tell you straight up.

We are adults, and there is no reason for me to lie to you. As for you 'feeling' guilty for cheating, should you ever decide to take me seriously and go on a date with me, which by the way, I am asking you now. It wouldn't be because of me; it would because of your decision, a personal choice you decide on making."

He gets up from his chair and walks around to me, bending down to make eye level with me. I pressed my back against the chair to create some space between us. "Even if you don't want to have sex with me, at least have dinner with me sometime, I am okay with that as it will allow me an opportunity to get to know you more."

I cleared my throat, "I am not cheating on my husband like you said it's a personal choice I would be making." I told him firmly.

"I am not asking you to cheat. I am sure dinner is allowed with a friend." He leans his head to the side and smiles at me.

"But, you don't have the intentions of a friend. You just told me you want to have sex with me; my friends' don't want to have sex with me."

"How do you know that?"

"Mr. Min-"

"Yoongi, please call me Yoongi,"

I sighed heavily, "Yoongi, it doesn't matter how I know. I just know."

"Fine, I won't force you, but at least have lunch with me tomorrow, here in the office? What do you say? Or will that be considered as cheating too?"

I thought about it for a while and sighed, "I don't think so, but I won't be in tomorrow."

"An excuse?"

"No, I thought you were going to fire me, so I didn't say anything earlier, but tomorrow makes three years since my dad died, and I usually have a hard time on that day, so I don't think with all my mistakes recently it would be good for me to be here," I told him honestly.

"I am sorry I didn't know. Listen, why don't you leave early, go home, get some rest. I will see you on Tuesday, and we can rethink lunch then?" Yoongi stood up and offered me his hand so I could stand as well.

"Thank you, and it's okay." I was very appreciative of him giving me the rest of the day off, I genuinely had a lot going on in my head, but one thing was helping me along was that I knew Jungkook would be home tomorrow if not, tonight. I am sure he would probably stay for the weekend.