Room 17 || kth ✔️

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I woke up in a state, my mind was filled with doubt and disappointment in myself. I barely slept because I kept waking to the site of Taehyung in my dreams. I had regrets about the night before and it played over and over in my head. The What Ifs.

What if I hadn't chased him away, would it have solved the problem? What if I had opened up to him about my parents last night, would it have made things better between us? What if I hadn't tried to run away from him but instead just let him be there for me, would it have eased the pain?

So many unanswered questions roamed my mind all night. Each ending in a memory of Taehyung and I together. First his hugs with the warmth that could cure all doubt, then his kisses that soothed all the pain and then his smile that brightened up my day and finally him just lying next to me the reassurance of his presence was all I needed.

He had me hooked, addicted to everything about him, but my stubborn, used to being independent side struggled with the acceptance of someone actually caring about me. To some extent it was scary, frightening even.

I decided to get up from my bed and go to him. I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in mirror. My eyes were almost shut in thickness, my cheeks pink in colour, my lips dry and cracked and my hair stood on end. I ran the tap and threw some cold water on my face to wake myself up, hopefully make myself look a little more presentable. Not that it would've made much of a difference, i looked like death.

I mustered the courage to walk to his door, but I couldn't bring myself to knock. I lifted my hand and made a fist approaching the door. I was about to knock when the door opened and infront of me he stood. My eyes grew wide and tears formed in them. I couldn't say a word, I just stared and he stared back.

I felt my legs become weak and I fell, he caught me before I fell to the ground. I felt both weak and determined to get up and try that again. I wanted to show him that I was stronger than this. I got up to my feet and he grabbed me into his embrace, I stood there in awe. I hugged him back...I missed this! In fact I missed him!