LUCAS
I pull at a gas station to get gas and i decide to grab some snacks at the store for her. I glint at her when I walk back to the car and I’m not surprised that she is still asleep. She has been doing that a lot but we have been doing our best to keep her bustling.
Three years ago when she joined SU, she really wanted friends who would break a limb for her and I am glad she has such friends.
She has Nick who would do anything that is humanly possible to make her happy, he loves her to bits. And honestly I envy how close the two are. He has told me severally that their relationship is platonic but it is hard to believe that he doesn’t have sensual feelings for her.
I mean, how can he be that close to Belle and not feel anything? It’s Belle we are talking about.
I don’t know how she does it but she has a way of creeping into men’s heart.
_Or is it just me?_
In case you are wondering, I still crave her. My heart still beats for her. She was away for three good years but trust me nothing has changed. She is still the only one that I love, the only one I dream of and you have no idea how I regret ever treating her like shit.
There are those things that you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
But if I could go back in time, I would make everything right. I would put her first and treat her like the queen she is. I would take back every nasty thing I said to her and explain everything.
I kept convincing myself that I was doing it for her but I didn’t stop to think or ask if that’s what she really wanted.
I should have done what I did three days ago at the hospital.
She has Jessica. I know no one will ever take Elsa’s place in Belle’s heart but Jessica has been really trying to fill the void that Elsa left.
Liz and Veronica have been there for her and I consider her lucky to have them. I grew up without a mother figure and I know how it sucks. She is free with Liz but I don’t think she has bonded with Veronica yet. And knowing her very well she won’t let her in easily, but Veronica seems to really love her. I am yet to understand how they miraculously met but I am glad that she is in Belle’s life now.
Jake adores her. Once upon a time, he used to have feelings for her. She caught him making out with Josie and Jake gave her up. His feelings for her didn’t last long just like their relationship wouldn’t have lasted.
Keith met her three days ago but I won’t be surprised if he announces that he has hots for her too. I have seen how he looks at her and you have no idea how many times I have wanted to tell him to keep his eyes off her.
*~*~*
Thirty minutes later I pull the car between two trees and I step outside to inspect the place and see if I can drive further. The forest is a bit thick than the last time I was here sixteen years ago and I guess that’s the furthest we can go, we will have to walk but it’s not a long distance. Belle could use a nature walk.
I toss the snacks in the bag pack strapping it over my shoulders and walk over to the passenger’s seat to wake her up. She has been sleeping for the past forty minutes, I am not complaining.
When I met her three years ago, she was suffering from insomnia and she used to have terrible nightmares, I would rather she sleep than not sleep at all. But Liz said we shouldn’t let her sleep more often.
I take my time to admire her baby face and I give in the urge to trail my index finger on her pretty face. She doesn’t have any make up on and she is still beautiful despite the anguish that you can literally see even in her sleep.
