Fantasizing a war - A Sanders Sides Trilogy

The Black Wedding

Warning: Logan, Remus and Philip used bad language in this script. We had to cover Patton's' ears.

Remus shifted foot to foot as he watched the final preparations go up - large 'union' banners, apparently a custom of the Light Realm. The city's' main street was cleared and cleaned, people beginning to line the sides. He could see trolls entering the city, getting directed by very scared Light Knights.

"Relax."

Remus screeched at the voice that appeared at his shoulder and spun around to see an unamused King Philip. "You forgot I was here, didn't you?"

"Yes! I mean, no!" Protested Remus in embarrassment. The duke sagged. "I forget you were there..." He admitted in defeat.

Philip rolled his eyes. "And now I feel sorry for Deceit unknowingly marrying an idiot."

Remus gasped. "Rude! He knows  I'm an idiot! He just doesn't know how big of an idiot I am." 

Philip rolled his eyes again, although this time it was teasing and friendly. "I just came to wish you good luck. We had our chefs work very hard at the traditional food that you eat at these sort of things."

"Thanks, Philly boy." Remus grinned. The smile turned apprehensive as he turned back to the preparations. "I just really hope the snake won't jilt me..."

"What do you mean? Why would he jilt you?"

The Duke sighed nervously. "It's rather common, to be honest... An unofficial tradition, kinda. Very often at Black Weddings, the King or Queen will jilt the first person to marry and possibly marry someone else."

"Black Weddings?" Frowned Philip.

"Black Weddings are basically what we call royal weddings."

"Ah," Said the King, now looking out across the city. "We don't call them that. Shining Unions, that's what we call them. And a King or Queen can only marry once unless their lover dies."

Remus focused on Philip out of the corner of his eye. "Why didn't you?"

"Huh?"

"Why didn't you remarry? Y'know, after your wife, uh... Kicked the bucket?"

Philip tensed, before sagging. "I don't know... I guess we had already given birth to Roman and I didn't want him to forget her. She was a lovely woman and, in my heart and head, couldn't be replaced by anyone."

Remus nodded slowly and a silence fell between them as they observed the venue.

Then Remus ruined it. "To be honest, Philip, I think, on the day I die, Dee is gonna party so fuckin' hard that he'll get fucked hard."

"What?! Ew!  No, that's disgusting! He wouldn't do that! " Philip curled his lip in slight repulsion of the idea. "I mean, he wouldn't do it straight away! He'd have to organise the party - you know, get the people who'll fuck him on the guest list! It might be two days after you died!"

Remus nodded thoughtfully. "It'll be great, cuz I'll gate crash as a ghost and watch the shit go down."

Philip closed his eyes, also nodding slowly, and spoke like an enlightened man, "I'd like you to be aware that I will not come. I'm far too old now but, if I were younger, I'd jump for the joy at the news of your death and gladly attend the party. Now, alas, I'll only be able to jump in certain and delighted joy."

"I hate you sometimes..." Grumbled the Duke.

Philip smirked. "And the feeling is mutual. Obviously."