My Best Friend's the God of Mischief // Peter x Loki

look at the flowers and count one, two, three

"Mother," the word felt strange on Loki's tongue. Not because he didn't like the way it sounded, but because he had gone for so long without saying it (he wanted to say it. There was not a single day Loki didn't want to shout it from the top of his lungs. The only thing keeping him from doing so was that he knew he would break, if he were to say it - he missed her so much that the thought of her smile would drown him with grief)

Now she was here. She was here right in front of him. She was. Norns, Loki felt his knees growing weak. He might just drop down and cry. It felt like forever since he - since they -

Loki knew he was starting to sob, he tried to contain himself. To say anything except that 'mother' he had said. But his brain couldn't process anything. He couldn't think.

Frigga stood there. Only a few inches away from Loki. He was slightly taller than her. It was endearing, truly, the fact Loki used to be so small that he would always sit on her lap and she would always pick him up in her arms as often as possible. Now it seemed he had grown stronger, bigger while she had grew older (smaller, even) and if he could, he would be the one pulling her close in tight embrace. He could. Could he?

Loki didn't know what to do.

He wished his mother would be the first to act. To hug him. So then he could hug her back and they would never let go. Though she just... stood still (perhaps she was just as overwhelmed)

"Mother -" Loki said again. His voice small and vulnerable.

She cut him off with a sharp, "what have you done, Loki?"

"Done?" Loki blinked. He didn't understand what she was talking about. "Mother, I - what do you mean?"

Why hasn't she hugged you already? There were always voices; Loki's archenemy. Always so poisonous. Always so cruel. She used to hug you all the time even after you returned from a short trip. Perhaps she woke up. Perhaps she realized what a hideous monster you are, Jotun dog.

No. Loki forced himself not to listen. She was - she was just overwhelmed.

Frigga tilted her head to the side. The smile disappeared from her face and she looked - angry. "You know the crime you've committed, Loki. Ragnarok. Asgard's doom. Your father's death," her voice raised. She had never raised her voice, especially at him.

"Amma-"

"My death!"

Loki's breathe hitched. She was - why would she - she'd never - no. Loki shook his head because he didn't know what to say. She was right.

Hadn't he been in that cell, he would've saved her.

"You are a failure, Loki. I expected better of you." Her voice cold. Ice cold. Her eyes even colder.

Loki took a step backward. Suddenly he felt small, weak, pathetic. And more than anything he was disgusted with himself. Of course she had every right to be angry with him, to be disappointed. He let her die after all!

(Not to mention other crimes he committed - the fall of Asgard by his hands, the death of Odin and more of his mischief)

"I'm sorry," Loki said, his voice quiet and cracked. He unconsciously picked at his left hand, his indication of being nervous and anxious, it was her habit that had rubbed off on him long ago.

Frigga smiled now. But it wasn't the kind smile Loki used to know. This smile was anything but kind. She placed a hand on his cheek, even after everything Loki still leaned into her palm reflectively. Her touch always relaxed him.

He closed his eyes, feeling warm tears rolling down.

She slapped him hard. His head turned to the side from the impact as his skin burnt like fire.