after you left |ai|

9

By 4am I knew everything there was to know about Sam. The girl that caused so much pain and darkness in their lifes. I had read all the articles about her death and read all about the lawsuit they had won.

She died because a doctor made a mistake. He lost his wife and she lost her sister because a doctor messed up when she gave birth. Everything started to make sense now. Why his pain and sadness was always accompanied by regret and anger. He blames himself for losing her and in the back of her head, Jackie blames Ashton for it too.

Except for one post, there wasn't much I could find about the daughter she left behind but I could understand that he wanted to keep her away from the media.

I wanted to look up everything about them too. I wanted to know what he was like before her but I decided against that. I had already looked up so much about Jackie and Sam and their family that I felt guilty.

I felt like I was doing a background check on my friend and that felt wrong. Yet it seemed necessary to find out how many other things she lied about to hide all of this. I wanted to figure out why telling me was harder than making up stories. I couldn't care less that they were famous but I can't handle another liar in my life.

Especially after what Thomas did to me, how he lied to me for 6 months while cheating on me. And now I just found out even my new friends weren't exactly being honest with me.

That's the last thing I needed right now.

How can I trust someone new now when all everyone has been doing to me was lying?

I got up from the couch and closed my laptop when there was a knock at my door, at 4:27am. I looked through the hole first before opening the door to see the one out of three people that I did not want to see tonight. I contemplated just keeping it closed, pretending I was asleep but the light was on and there was music playing softly, I knew he would have heard that.

"I know you're standing infront of the door I can see the shadow, just let me in please." He pleaded and I waited another minute, really thinking about just walking away.

"I'm not really up for this crap right now." I said while my back rested against the door.

"Babe, just let me in." He said and when I heard the nickname he has been calling me for 7 years, I wanted to break down. I wanted to yell at him but I had no energy left to do so. "I told her about us. After she talked with Amber, she figured it out. She left me Elle."

"Are you trying to make me feel sorry for you?" I asked and I could feel the door move slightly, he was leaning against it on the other side.

"Elle I miss you." He said softly and a tear ran down my cheek as I listened to his words. "I regret what I did and I hope you can forgive me. I want you back."

"Thomas you ruined me." I said to him and I could hear him let out a sigh.

"But I miss you. I need my best friend back." He said and I looked down at my hands while he talked. "I want my girlfriend back and I want her to be my wife one day."

"What about your kid?" I asked him and he chuckled softly.

"She will never let me near our kid and I don't want a kid with her when I can have one with you."

"Go home Thomas, you should have thought about that 7 months ago or even a month ago when you decided to leave me. I was so inlove with you that I would have forgiven you back then. But now I had time to realise how much of an asshole you are." I said before walking away from the door. I turned off the music. "I'm going to bed, you should too." I turned off the light and I could hear him knocking on the door. I was still too awake, not ready to go to bed so I just sat on the couch in the dark while I listened to him begging for my forgiveness.