Secret Love Song

I'm Not Losing You

Taehyung's P.O.V

A bright, warm sunlight beamed in through the giant glass window leading to the balcony. Forcing Taehyung awake. He realizes that he hadn't even taken the extra time to plug in his phone last night when he goes to check it and it's dead. Fuck my head hurts.

Taehyung knew he definitely had way too much to drink last night when he grumbled out of bed making his way down the steps to see his husband sitting on the couch in silence.

"Bogum?"

"Taehyung"

He wasn't quite sure why but Tae could sense animosity in Bogum's voice.

"Are you alright? I thought you had filming today?"

Bogum lifted his head, glassy eyes locking with Tae's. "Well it's pretty fucking hard to film romance scenes knowing that my life at home is falling apart"

Tae suddenly felt sick to his stomach at Bogum's words, whenever the events of last night replayed in his head... but how does he know?

"W-What are you sa-"

"Don't lie. God that's the worst thing you could do right now is pretend not to know what I'm talking about, Tae."

"Bog—"

"I was here, Taehyung. I didn't leave last night. I was going to...honestly, I was going to meet someone. A girl. Lately you've been weird and distant, I've been insecure, so I was letting her give me some attention. It was innocent though, nothing more than some shameless flirting." Bogum's voice was cracking though he tried so hard to stay strong "I was about to leave out the door when I realized I treated you so poorly last night. I felt so fucking horrible when I realized that I treat you so shitty at work events...you don't deserve that. I have an angel as a husband to show off yet there I was waiting for the dinner to end so I could get you home. Once I kicked myself in the ass enough, I decided I was going to set up a nice scenery for us by the pool and apologize for how awful I've been"

Tae is already sobbing, he feels horrible remembering everything he said to Jungkook last night. Thanking god that some of the worst things were over text.

"T-Tae, are you going to leave me? For him?" Bogum looked so broken, it was as if Tae watched all of the life drain from his husband's eyes

"Bogumie, I-I I don't know. I'm so confused. Whenever they came to visit so many feelings rushed in that I didn't even know were still there. Last night I was drunk and pissed. I knew you were going to meet that girl, I heard her talking at the bar so I put two and two together when I heard you on the phone. So I-I let my anger and alcohol cloud my mind and sway my judgement—I'm so so sorry" collapsing to his knees, Tae couldn't hold himself up anymore. Everything felt weak. His heart hurt so bad. He hated seeing Bogum like this but as much as he wished he did, he didn't regret last night and he doesn't regret what he said to Jungkook.

"You know, I've always wondered if your and his relationship had something to do with Bangtan's disbandment...it just didn't make sense. The sudden break up of the band...and I always had the hugest crush on you Taehyung but everyone just kind of knew to back off from you—then when I saw you here, I-I was so damn excited. Then when we started dating, I felt like I was dreaming."

"Bog-"

"You've talked about him in your sleep before, you know. I always just ignored it. No matter how much I wanted to ask, I ignored it. You were mine, you are mine. SO I wasn't going to let some sleep talking make me suddenly doubt our relationship. Then you said they were coming to visit and my heart stopped. Oh my god you have no idea how scared I was, that I was going to come home and you would be with him and my life would be flipped upside down."