Problems With The Hierarchy

#10 Overshadowing Aches

I'm a dear. Okay enjoy. ^^

#10 Overshadowing Aches

I was in a mess as he walked away. What did he feel? Had I hurt him? Did he think I was right? Was all these a dream?

Unable to reorganize my thoughts, I walked back to my room like a zombie.

Then I dozed off in a blur.

**

"Ring!!"

I rubbed my eyes involuntarily. I stifled a yawn as I reluctantly climbed out of bed. Stupid alarm clock. I want more sleep!

Walking into the toilet with extremely small strides, I finally reached the threshold. I picked up my toothbrush. Picking up the toothbrush, I can't help to look at myself in the messy state.

I shook my head violently hoping I could find logic in the happenings.

It was just a kiss, right?

Yep, I assured, having composed myself.

I took a bath and fretted over my outfit.

Wait. Since when was I so self-conscious? I should wear the anything that comes to my mind to make myself comfortable.

"Actually, you have an okay-body. If only you paid more attention to your image and stop wearing sweats and baggy clothes." he laughed as he finished his sentence.

You want to impress him, don't you?

A voice sounded in my head.

Ugh!  Is that true?

Yeah, you know it's true. Don't deny.

What? It responded back to me?

Maybe it, I meant I. The inner I was right.

But why?!

Caught in a dilemma, I decided to wear a casual tee instead of my baggy clothes, with a pair of sweats that I wear basically every day. Well, aside from the few occasions I wore dresses.  Fair enough. Half normal half... Abnormal.

"Beep!" The car horn took me out of my reverie.

Richard is here.

What should I say?

Will we stay as friends? It's going to be so awkward! I can't lose him as a friend!

That's it.

He knows that I meant nothing more.. yes he does. To be sure, I’m going to address this issue with him later. Having decided, I grabbed my bag and made sure I have my phone. I don't want history to repeat itself.

"H....i." I stuttered at the sight of him. As I stood at the porch, I see Richard standing at the car door, waiting for me. "Hi." he spoke with ease. Gesturing me towards the car, he opened the door for me like how Bryson did yesterday.

I plastered an awkward smile and slid into the car. He walked over to the other side of the car, opened the door at ease, and then slid in.

He buckled his seatbelt. Then, he gave me a heart-stopping grin and tried to help me with my seatbelt.

"Uh.. I can do it myself." I stuttered again, not expecting his chivalric gesture.

I fumbled with my fingers and desperately try to fasten my seatbelt. Now, that guy who said when you are nervous you can't even do simple things properly should really get a Nobel Prize.  Look at me now; I can't even fasten a seatbelt.

"Hah. Let me help you." Richard offered, as he bent over to help me.

"Done." He announced as the naughty seatbelt finally got into its place.

Geez. That was awkward. I was glad I endured the embarrassing moments which seemed like hours.

He quickly drove out of our street, and towards the main one, heading to school.

Now or never. Tell him now! Say it!

"Hey Richard about yesterday-"

As I was about to start, he interjected, "The results would be out today. Excited?"

What results?

Results for the selection, dumb-ass! What else can it be?

The same voice just now answered my question.

Oh right.

"Earth to Watson." Richard nudged me, moving his fingers on his free hand in front of my face, trying to get my attention.

"Oh.. Right..." I stuttered involuntarily. "Yeah. I'm excited." I agreed, now awkward and not knowing what to say.

After that, the both of us didn't say anything. Me, being too awkward. Him.. I don't know.

As we turned in, I sighted my High school. As usual, jocks and cheerleaders were crowding around an area.

As I slid out of the car, I scanned the area while waiting for Richard to switch off his engine and get out of his car.

"They are looking at the results," I stated, still scanning around.

He smirked. Hah. He must have something to do with this. I bet ten bucks with you.

"Lizieee!" Joey squealed, dragging the Zy sound of my name.

She scanned me and gave me a skeptical look. "I can't believe a nerd like you got selected." She tried to faked-gape in disbelief.

I ignored the first part she tagged me as a nerd, but focused on the second part. I got selected?

"Unbelievable, huh." Richard commented as though he knew it all along.

"You think I'm telling the truth?" Joey giggled, as she cringed, placing her arm over her stomach. What a cold joke.

Wait? So did I get selected or not? This is so confusing.

"Confused? Go and see for yourself.” Richard grabbed at my hand then pulled me towards the noticeboard.

This feeling is weird. This is the first time he touched me since our kiss. I wondered what he felt about it. Did he regret? Did he enjoy it? Did he think it was normal? Does he feel different grabbing my hand like this now?

“Excuse me,” he continued grabbing my hand as he try to squeeze our way through the crowd.

His actions were redundant. Of course everyone would give way to the golden boy. Just then, I realised how different the two of us were. Just then, I realised how I was a school nerd, and he was a golden boy.

We will never ever be.

I tried to pull my hand out of his grip. Suddenly I felt an excruciating pain in my chest. It was unexplainable. Someone put a knife right into my heart. Yeah, it felt like that. I know all the other people have always been criticizing me for being so close to Richard. But the hurt was nothing like now. It was like in that moment realization struck me.

Surprised, Richard stared at me with a questioning look. I plastered an awkward smile and began walking towards to look at the list. Somehow, he should be given the way. And I should be those trying desperately to make my way through, but no one would even care to move aside. Who cares about a school nerd? As you try to walk, people would even obstruct you. This is the kind of treatment a nerd receives.

No popularity. High school has developed an unequal hierarchy.

Dejected, I silently tagged behind Richard.

I guess that was how you feel when someone overshadows you.