Childhood Sweetheart

Ten

The day had finally come for my little sister to be born; mom pregnancy was high risk because of her age. She ended up having to get a C-section because my little sister was breech which means she would be coming out feet or butt first instead of head first. Michael and I would come out every now and then to keep everybody updated on what was going on. It was just a waiting game. It's been 10 hours already. My grandmother was back and forth and so was Damian. I refused to leave my mom side. Damian stayed on the phone with me majority of the time but he had to work along with being there with us. After 22 hours of labor it was finally time for my mom to get ready for her C-section so Damian and I waited in the waiting area. I knew my mom was in good hands she had Michael by her side. About an hour later Michael came out with this look on his face and I knew something was wrong I felt it in his energy. He dropped to his knees put his face in his hands and started crying. We asked what was wrong more than 3 times before he could even say anything. Right when they were about to prep mom for her C-section the baby heart just stopped beating they did everything they could to try and save her but it was too late for my little sister her heart failed before she could even be born. She had to be born a stillborn. I wanted to see my mom I had to be there for her.

I know my mom was hurting I'm hurting. I was so excited about having a little sister. Michael hugged me and led me to where mom was. I asked Damian to come with me for emotional support I've become a crybaby in the last few weeks. I walked in the room, my mom was holding my little sister and even though she was blue and purple in the face because she was deceased, she was so gorgeous with a head full of hair. They had to have a pastor come in and pray with the family. It was a sad day for all of us. I was hurting for Michael and mom I know how bad they wanted to have a baby together. Damian held me I couldn't hold back the tears and after awhile I had to leave the room I couldn't take looking at my baby sister lifeless body. Her name Saniya Elle Moore. She will forever be in our hearts. She looks so peaceful, I could tell my mom didn't want to let her go and it was hard. I knew I had to be there for her every step of the way. For the next few weeks my mom went into a deep depression, she wouldn't eat, she didn't want to shower, and we couldn't even get her to leave the house I didn't even want to go to work. I had just started my job at the hospital working at the front desk from 7-3 Mon-Friday. Grandma was always there I would call in and check on her or I would have Damian go check on her when he came home on his lunch break. Michael even had to take off work. We had to force her to eat. She would wake up out of her sleep sweating. I finally knew why I was so emotional, extra tired, and hungry all the time I was 8 weeks pregnant I wanted to tell my mom but the state of mind she was in it just wasn't the right time. We all agreed to wait to tell her.