☀️2.64: For The Last Time,☀️

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Music: Can't Help Falling In Love - a cover by Kina Grannis

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For The Last Time,

Reed Jacob Fonacier's POV

The very first time I knew that I loved my twin sister was when we were in Maldives.

Before that time, I was just in a constant denial.     

Yes. I knew that I was expected to love Savannah simply because she's my twin. It's called familial love and it's pretty normal to feel that way. She's my sister and family members were expected to love one another.

Right?

But f uck that kind of love and every expectation that went along with it.

When something unexplainable happened to me, which made me question those expectations and everything else including all my beliefs and morals, I was instantly lost. I didn't know what else to do but accept the fact that I was feeling it.

That I was already feeling something more than what was expected for me to feel for her.

I fell in love.

To make matters worse, it was difficult even for me to explain to myself about what the hell was happening inside of me since I didn't know how to call it or how to address it properly. I wasn't exposed to that kind of love yet so I was frustrated and confused.

In fact, before I even felt it or even have a taste of it, Savannah was just my annoying little sister who was a few minutes younger than me and someone whom I should be obliged to protect and cherished.

Before, she was just my twin sister and a female version of me. I never saw her more than that nor did I expect to see her more than that.

Yes, it's true that I already did everything to make her happy, even going beyond what was required of me in some instances, and yes, I was overprotective of her, but I'd done all of these just because I thought that I was doing my duty as her older brother and I saw her as this fragile little person that needed me but never---I f ucking swear---never have I imagined being protective of her and thinking of her every second of every day for the reason that I couldn't lose her to anyone or to anything.

I never imagined that she would be the reason for my being.

She was always been my constant but... she wasn't always my life. Yet.

So just f ucking imagine my surprise when suddenly, out of the f ucking blue, I was feeling this new...and ...dangerous but inexplicably delightful kind of pain inside my chest whenever I saw her.

All of a sudden, every moment with her was like a life line to me.

Every smile, every laugh and every look she gave me, sent a ripple of sensation and a f ucking whole lot of emotion into me.

I suddenly felt a sweet kind of ache inside my chest every time she hugged me or every time she noticed me. I felt that kind of ache that didn't happen slowly or all at once like what other people kept on telling.

To me, it happened even before I realized that it did.

I guess, I was really born to love her more than what I was expected. Maybe, just maybe, my feelings for her were just buried down below layers of innocence and my inexperience.

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