fake [s.m] (REWRITE)

chapter eighteen

[third person]
-

the days, hours, minutes, seconds were ticking by too quickly. anya simply couldn't keep up with everything. as long as the world went round, she was one moment closer to losing shawn for who knows how long.

she was terrified to break his heart. she was terrified to leave him.

she was simply scared to even be around everyone on tour.

shawn was clueless about everything. he went on with tour, happy with how his life was going, happy with the progression of his relationship with anya, and happy with tour in general. the closest person to him at that moment was constantly with him, he knew nothing could go wrong.

or so he thought.

he had no idea of what was coming his way.

"babe?" shawn calls from the wardrobe of his dressing room, his shirtless back facing anya, who was sat calmly on the couch, flicking through a book on her lap.

"yeah?" she responds, looking up from the page, and holding her finger at the sentence she was on.

"what do i wear tonight?" he asks, turning around and holding up two saint laurent shirts. anya holds in her chuckle, and looks at the two black button ups; one had polka dots all over it, and the other had pinstripes.

"stripes," anya answers, making shawn grin, and put back his other shirt into the transportable wardrobe. it really wasn't a wardrobe, it was more like a rail with a zip up enclosure around it. but it was helpful to shawn, since he changed around three times each day of tour, and anya had some of her spare clothes there too, since she was there for however long shawn would be there for.

"i can just feel it, tonight is gonna be incredible," he sighs, pulling his shirt over his shoulders, not bothering to button it up, and falling onto the other side of the couch, his arm resting around the back of the sofa. "the meet and greet was buzzing, and the q&a was so loud. tonight's gonna be insane."

anya bit the inside of her cheek, before putting down her book, and marking the page, sighing gently, and easing her way into shawns embrace. she felt close to him that way, and she knew she wouldn't be feeling his arms anytime soon.

"hey, you okay? you've been so out of it for the last few days," shawn notices again, playing with her hair gently, tucking some of it behind her ear. his eyebrow furrows gently, as she pushes out a small sigh, letting a fake smile lie across her lips.

"i'm fine, just tired, that's all," she mumbles, her eyes fluttering shut, as she shuffles slightly to feel more comfortable. "i'm sorry."

"why are you apologising gorgeous?" shawn asks, slightly more concerned than anything else. "you're scaring me, darling."

"nothing, it's fine," she plays off, as shawn sighs in response, his fingers stopping playing with her hair. "shawn, please don't get annoyed at me," the lump forms in her throat yet again. she didn't want to argue with him. not now. not this close to them actually having to break up.

"you won't tell me what's going on in your head, anya," he sighs. "i'm not you. i don't constantly know what it's like to be you," he says, slightly annoyed and frustrated. anya's eyes fill with tears immediately, and she looks up, shaking her head. "woah, hun, don't cry, why are you crying?"

"please don't fight with me about it," she mumbles. "i can't tell you. please just accept that." shawn breathes out a frustrated sigh, before bringing his hand up to cup her cheek, running his thumb over her rosy skin.

"alright," he gives in. "anya, i-"

"shawn, let's do this!" andrew tells, knocking on his dressing room door, making anya and shawn both sigh softly.