Heart In The Armor (Alphonse X Reader)

And the Fight That Ended Her

I've been in and out of the ER for a couple of days. All they've been saying is: "Come back tomorrow." Over and over and over again. It's like I'm a test subject. Alphonse, Ed and Winry started pitching in to get me some gifts, which I try to decline cause I hopefully wouldn't be in here for to long.

Alphonse has also been helping Lilly with alchemy, the other day, she brought me a pig, at first it didn't look like it when I saw it, then I slowly saw some of the features and said thank you. So, it's now my fourth day going back, after the series of tests, examinations, poking and prodding at my back, which got really annoying, they finally got results.

Just to be noted, I haven't walked in about the four days since we've been here. Alphonse has been to worried I'd get hurt, he's been worrying for a while now. It's about time to go to Dublith, too. So, when I went into the hospital room, with Alphonse, Ed, and Winry, and with the doctor walking into the room. The doctor had a serious face, like someone just died. I mean, this must be a pretty hard job, telling people life changing events, or telling loved ones someone has died?

Everyone in the room tensed up, the doctor looked down at the clipboard, looked up and said:

"You are paralyzed from the waist down."

Winry almost broke out into tears, I grab the clipboard from his hands, and read it.

Patient in 154, (L/N) (Y/N)
Had previous trauma to her back region, includes:

Coughing up blood
Blood in lungs
Inability to stand/walk
Dizziness
Numbness in upper leg, not automail

Diagnosis: Paralysis

     It felt like the words where twirling around my head.

                     Paralysis

    Inability to Walk

                             Dizziness

         Blood in lungs

I hear footsteps as the doctor walked out of the room, Winry was crying into Ed's shoulder, Ed was trying to stay strong for her, Alphonse came to my side.

"Are you ok?...." He held my hand, which was on my lap. I was in shock, I wouldn't be able to help them again. I wouldn't be able to walk. I wouldn't be able to run if something happens. I can't do anything, but just sit in this chair and watch. I look up to Alphonse, who is standing up in front of me, with worry in his eyes, and feel reality kick in.

Tears flood my eyes as Alphonse pulls me into a hug, I remember seeing sincerity in his eyes, and then him pulling me closer, as the tears rolled down my check, onto the wheelchair, that I will be stuck to for the rest of my life.

Timeskip

     We've arrived at Mrs. Izumi's house, I called her before we got here before the train ride, the conversation went something like:

"Hello, who is this?"

"It's (Y/N), a friend of the Elrics. Do you... happen to want to teach a girl who wants to learn alchemy?"

"Depends. What's she like."

"Well, she's pretty shy. She's also looking for a new family, but be careful with her, she's been through a l-"

"I'll take her in."

"That's great. I didn't want to bring her up for adoption, We'll be arriving tonight. Goodbye."

So, Ed led the way to the door, slowly opening it to make sure he wasn't going to get kicked, but, unsurprisingly, he still did. Lilly hid behind my wheelchair, still being small enough to do so. Mrs. Izumi slammed the door open, and her eyes went right to my wheelchair.

Her eyes widen as she walked over to me, inhaling to yell at me, then stopped. "We'll talk about this later, where's the girl?" I looked behind me, a head looked out from behind, then quickly went back out.

"It's ok, she's really nice. She's only like that to that dummy." I said, pointing at Ed.

"WHO YOU CALLING DUMB?!" Lilly snickered at Ed's reaction, Mrs. Izumi went over to Lilly, and stuck her hand out to her, giving her a warm smile.

"I'm Izumi Curtis, if you want, you can call me Ms. Izumi, or anything you want. I'll be your teacher and guardian for now on."

Lilly's small hand shock Izumi's, as they started to walk inside, Ed and Al following, I started to go up, but I realized she had stairs, so I clapped my hands together, and reached for the ground, which I couldn't touch and landed flat on my face. In which I got frustrated, and started cursing at the ground quietly, as I made the ramp, only to be brought right back down, because of the steep incline, the chair rolls back, hits a rock, and goes backwards, sending me onto my back.

I grab my wheelchair and try to stand up, in which I fall once again, but could stand for a second, which gives me a false sense of hope. I sit down, trying to think of a way to get up the stairs, jump through the window? No, I can't jump. Climb onto the roof, then break roof? No, I can't climb.

I look around me, all I see are sticks, the grass and some bushes. I could drag myself onto the top of the ramp, leaving the little pride I have left, but my wheelchair is to heavy to drag up after. I find a twig and throw it at the window, not breaking it, but making a noise. Alphonse comes rushing out, and picks me up and my wheelchair. That would've been easier.

When I get inside, Mrs. Izumi is scolding Ed about something. Lilly is talking to Mr. Curtis, and Alphonse is putting me down in the wheelchair.

I roll over to the usual room I stay in, and push myself onto the bed, taking off my shoes and throwing them on the floor, then hanging up my coat onto the bed frame.

'I guess it was a waste to get these legs then.' I think, looking down at my metal feet. 'It's just a waste of metal.' I try to move my leg, but nothing happens, it just stays there, as if something was holding it down in place. 'And what will I do if I can't fight? I don't even need this arm anymore.' I look at my arm, dangling at my side as I look back at my legs. 'If I wasn't so stubborn, then I would be ok.'

Useless.

'If I thought before I went in, then I would be able to walk, now I can't do anything.'

Waste of oxygen.

'I wouldn't be able to travel with them, without being a burden.'

They never cared.

'I'll never be able to joke around with them, see them fight over keeping a cat.'

Why would they put up with you?

'I'll never hold his hand. I'll never hug him, I'll probably never see him again."

He didn't care.

'He'll probably find some other girl, they'll fall in love. Have a family. And I'll just watch, being stuck to a chair.'

He never loved you.

'I'll just go back to living on the streets, probably begging again.'

I sit up on the bed, staring at my two useless legs, as I feel my two hands intertwine, on my lap, and only see a tear drop down onto my leg, making a clanking sound.