WANNA (A Wanna One AU)

Chapter 8

"My sister is a total badass," Jaehwan whispered in awe as we walked through headquarters.

I shook my head, slightly embarrassed. "I'm really not..."

"Don't listen to her, Jaehwan." Ryan cut me off. "She had me on the floor yesterday morning in 5 seconds."

"It was not 5 seconds" I rolled my eyes. "And I thought you didn't want people to know?"

"Amelia, we're initiating 7 new members to the gang tonight. We gotta show off how great it is to be apart of The Company!" Ryan exclaimed and Jihoon rolled his eyes.

"Ryan, we don't need to sell them, they have no choice but to join." I lowered my voice, but Jaehwan, who was holding my hand, heard me and let out a nervous laugh.

"That is not an acceptable attitude to have, especially coming from our leader." Ryan scolded and I shrugged. He turned to face Jaehwan. "Your sister is so cold all the time. Has she always been like this?"

Jaehwan looked confused. "Cold? She's the most bub..."

"OK that's enough!" I quickly intervened, covering my brother's mouth. I didn't need anyone from the company knowing I can be a total softie. "Anyway... EW JAEHWAN YOU'RE DISGUSTING!" I squealed, pulling my hand away from his mouth. The boys looked shocked at my outburst, before they started laughing, much to my embarrassment.

"Did Amelia Kim just squeal? Oh this is rich!"

"Shut up," I rolled my eyes. Ugh, he was never going to let me live this down. I turned to my brother, glaring. "You licked my hand. That's fucking gross!"

Jaehwan's eyes went wide. "Whoa, when did you start cursing? You used to hate foul language."

"Foul language?" Ryan roared in excitement. "You used to hate foul language?! Oh this is pure gold! I can't believe our fearless leader used to..."

"Shut the fuck up before I suspend your sorry ass for a week." I hissed, but this made him laugh even harder.

"You mean 'shut the flippity floppity frickity frackity up'?" he teased.

"It's been upped to a month."

"Oh come on! You won't actually suspend me, you big softie..."

"Oh I won't? Well, that's too bad because I'm suspending you right now." I turned to Wanna One. "If you'll excuse me, boys, I need to go have a word with my sunbae. I will meet up with you all in a bit." I said before walking away from the group.

"Amelia, you're not actually suspending me right?" Ryan called after me. "Oh, come on! We're best friends! Don't do this!" I ignored him. "Yah! Are you serious? Amelia... AMELIA!"

About 30 minutes later, I entered the conference room where Wanna One and the Parks were. "Hey, what did I miss?" I asked, noticing the awkward atmosphere.

Jaehwan stood up abruptly, rushing over and wrapping his arms around me. A pang of guilt hit me as I realized I was probably the reason why my brother was so emotional nowadays. When we were kids, he was always so happy and bubbly. Nothing could ever make his smile falter.

But now he was broken and it was my fault.

"You ok?" I whispered, rubbing his back.

He nodded. "Y-yeah, I just... C-c-can we..." he trailed off.

"Can we what? Jaehwanie, you can ask whatever you want."

"Can we have that private talk now?" he asked shyly and I nodded.

"Mhm, just give me one moment," I said, pulling away. I turned to Wanna One. "Are you boys alright?"

Jihoon let out a tired sigh, running a hand through his hair. "They took it well. I mean, they're still shocked..."

"As expected." I cut him off and he nodded. "I'm gonna steal Jaehwan for a bit, if you don't mind. We'll be in my office, just call if you need me." they all nodded.

I took Jaehwan's hand and gently led him out of the conference room. "How did you take the news?"

He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out.

"It's shocking, isn't it? I didn't want you involved because you're too pure for something as dark as this gang is."

"You're too pure for this all too." he said quietly and I shook my head.

"Maybe at one time I was too pure, but certainly not now." I smiled, sadly. "Besides, I was too curious for my own good, and now I have to deal with the repercussions. I'm just sorry you and the others were dragged in like this."

We arrived at my office and after swiping my id card and putting in my keycode, I pushed open the door. I allowed Jaehwan to enter first, and I followed after, shutting the door behind me.

He looked around my office like a kid in a candy store. His eyes were wide as he took in everything. "This is really nice," he whistled, sounding impressed.

"Before joining the gang, I wanted to..." I began, but he cut me off.

"You wanted to be an interior designer, I know." He finished and I fell quiet for a moment.

"Um, right." I mumbled, before shaking my head. "You can take a seat." I nodded over to the couch.

He took my hand, leading me over to the couch. He didn't let go, even after we sat down.

"You can ask any question you have." I said softly, promising myself that I would answer any and every question he asks. "And I really mean any question. You deserve to know everything, so don't hesitate, please."

"Amelia, you don't have to..." he said softly and I shook my head.

"Yes, I do. Please," I looked up at him. "This is for me as much as it's for you."

He hummed in response, nodding. "How long have you known?"

"Since we were 14." I answered immediately and his eyes went wide.

"So..."

"That's why I started ignoring you," I admitted guiltily. "I didn't want to, believe me. Dad made me."

"W-w-what?" he spluttered and I nodded. "Why would dad do that? He knew how close we were! He knew..." his voice was raising as his face turned red.   

"Jaehwan," I put my free hand on his leg. "It's not his fault. He was just looking out for you..."

"How is that looking out for me?" he scoffed.

"He was just protecting you. Our parents tried so hard to shield us from all of this, and I just had to be curious and ruin it. Even though I couldn't give them their only wish, you still could. He didn't want you to ruin your life like I ruined mine."

"Except he ruined my life anyway by taking you away from me!" he yelled and I jumped. I still wasn't used to seeing my brother angry.

"Jaehwan..."

"No, Amelia," he cut me off. "My life turned into hell after you started ignoring me. I didn't know what I did wrong, and no matter what I tried, you still wouldn't even look at me. I felt like my heart was ripped right out of my chest. I was so broken when they told me you had died. Depression really hit me hard. I barely remember the first year you were gone, but I know it was terrible. I didn't eat, I didn't sleep, I didn't talk, I didn't do anything. Halmeoni and Halabeoji were so worried about me, and I feel so bad for putting them through that for a year. They caught me attempting to kill myself 5 times that year" he admitted quietly, his voice laced with shame.

Tears were silently streaming down both of our faces as he recalled what he went through after the accident. "Jaehwanie, I'm so sorry." I cried softly and he wrapped his arms around me, hugging me tightly.

"It's not your fault." he whispered in my ear, and I felt tears hit my shoulder. "And I know it's not dad's fault, either. We were just unfortunate and have to experience this. But it's ok. Now that we're back together, I know we can push through it all and still have our happy ending in life. I said this earlier, but I don't care what kind of hell I have to endure, as long as I have you by my side. You make life worth living for."