from the beginning (COMPLETED)

chapter 37: a loving family

tyler, josh and ruby had all been together for six months now and they couldn't be happier.

except for one thing.

ruby was just naturally drawn to josh. if they were all sitting down, she would always sit in his lap instead of tyler's. she gave josh many more kisses. she would always tell josh she loved him but she would sometimes forget to tell tyler the same, lots of things.

and honestly, it hurt him.

josh had noticed, too.

"baby she loves you so much, i promise," josh told his husband after another night ruby had forgotten to tell tyler she loved him before she fell asleep.

tyler shrugged and sighed. "y-yeah."

"she just forgot, ty. she's only three. she even forgets which room is hers sometimes."

tyler just crawled into bed, getting under the covers and closing his eyes.

he started questioning himself. calling himself a bad father, an unlovable individual, everything.

and it broke josh's heart.

he laid down beside tyler, his stomach pressed against his husband's back.

"i love you, tyler."

"good to know someone does," tyler replied quietly.

josh felt terrible, kissing his husband's cheek.

tyler had never had a family before, and it seemed this was his chance to actually feel loved by someone other than josh.

and it was gone.

but he put on a smile for their daughter.

after tyler was asleep, josh got out of bed and went to their daughters room.

she was awake, reading another book.

"hey, miss ruby."

"hi jishjish!" she said cheerfully, opening her arms for josh to hug her.

"tyty is feeling kind of sad right now, and i was wondering if you would want to help cheer him up?"

ruby furrowed her eyebrows "why's tyty sad??"

josh chewed on his bottom lip, trying to think of how he could word it. "um... ok. tyty has a hard time believing people love him sometimes, and this is just one of those times..."

ruby pouted sadly, then started tearing up when she realized something. "i-is tyty sad b-because i d-didn't tell him i love h-him?"

josh sighed and looked down, not wanting to make his daughter feel bad, but also not wanting to lie to her.

ruby crawled out of her bed and toddled to the bathroom first since she tended to get lost in the house, but she eventually found tyler and josh's room.

she toddled to tyler's side of the bed and kissed his forehead as he slept. "i'm sorry i make you sad, daddy tyty. i love you," she said quietly, playing with his hair.

tyler woke up and nodded, picking ruby up and putting her on the bed as he was lying down. she plopped down onto his tummy and played with his fingers.

"tyty why do you not believe people love you? jishjish loves you. he loves you a lot. like, more than he loves chocolate. THAT'S how much."

tyler forced a fake smiled and nodded.

"and i love you. sorry if i forget to tell you sometimes. i just get really excited to go to bed because when i wake up we get to have family pancake time," she exclaimed.

tyler smiled genuinely and kissed ruby's forehead. "it's ok, sweetheart. i know you don't mean to."

"i'm gonna tell you everything i love about you!" she said excitedly, bouncing slightly on tyler's stomach.

tyler giggled and blushed, nodding his head.

"i love your hair! it's really floofy. daddy jishjish likes your floof too. and i love your sharpie marks! they're really pretty!" she exclaimed, referring to his tattoos. "and your smile! and your hugs! and your snuggles! you're even better at snuggling than jishjish is. and you make way better cookies than he does. he always burns them. and you're soooooo nice. you always tell me you like my dresses and my drawings. you're prolly the nicest person i've ever met. actually, you're tied with jishjish. oh, and you're really pretty!" she said, now hugging him tightly.

"thank you, sweet ruby. i couldn't ask for a better daughter," he smiled.

ruby blushed and smiled shyly, kissing his nose. "i love you, tyty. i promise! pinky promise!" she exclaimed, sticking out her pinky.

tyler giggled and hooked his pinky with hers, both of them moving their hands up and down.

"i wanna pinky promise you something else too, tyty."

tyler nodded and smiled "ok, what is it?"

"i want you to pinky promise me that you'll always know that i love you!" she said, completely serious. "oh, and that we'll keep having tyty-ruby snuggle time!"

tyler giggled and blushed, nodding his head and smiling as they pinky promised again.

"i pinky promise you that i'll always love you and be there for you, sweet ruby. even if i'm not there physically."

ruby smiled and blushed, hugging her dad tightly and lying down on his chest, her arms wrapped around his neck. "goodnight, tyty. i love you," she mumbled tiredly.

tyler hugged her back and closed his eyes, kissing the top of her head. "i love you too, ruby layne. sleep well, princess."

josh walked in a little while later, smiling as he saw his husband and daughter hugging one another tightly and they slept.

he crawled into bed and wrapped an arm around tyler, kissing his cheek.

"told you she loves you."