Brothers Through It All. ~Cashby & Kellic~

~18~

Kellin's POV

I rolled over in my bed and felt around for Vic only to find that he wasn't there. I sat up and reached to turn on my lamp. When I did I noticed Vic was sitting in my window sill.
"What're you doing?" I said as I rubbed my eyes. When he didn't say anything I slid out of the bed and shivered as goosebumps formed on my naked body from the coldness of my room. I grabbed a pair of sweatpants and slipped them on before walking over to Vic. I sat opposite to him in the window and took his hand in mine.

He looked to me and I could see the faint trail of tears on his cheeks.
"Darling are you okay?" I said and scooted closer to him.
"Kellin was what we did wrong?" He said in a low voice. I was stunned for a second.
"Vic are you talking about us..."
"Yea. I mean what if Jaime found out? Would he be hurt?"
"Vic I-"
"It hurt me when I found them earlier. They didn't know I was there of course but I went to his house you see. I just wanted to hang out that's all, but when I went up the stairs I heard him in there with her." He looked at me with a broken expression. "He was moaning and she was begging him to go faster." His hand tightened around mine. "I was so mad. Filled with rage and I came to see you. I wanted to feel wanted."

"Vic was that the only reason you came to see me? The only reason you done anything with me? Baby I want to be the one to make you feel wanted but I don't want to be just an excuse. I don't want to be just a way for you to release your anger." I let go of his hand and stood up from the window sill. I couldn't believe it. Here I thought I had this amazing guy but now it seemed as if he was only using me.

"Kellin no. You're not just an excuse. What we did meant so much to me and the feelings I have for you are so strong that they actually scare me." He said still sitting on the window sill. "But-"
"But Jaime? Am I right?" I said getting a little angry now. I went back to him and made him face me. "Vic he's hurting you and treating you wrong. Why can't you just leave him. Leave him and be happy with me."

"It's not that simple Kellin."
"Why not?!"
"I still love him!" He shouted and jerked away from me. I stood in silence. "I still love him but Im starting to love you too." He said quietly. "I don't know what to do." He put his head in his hands. "I feel so guilty for what we did but at the same time it was the best experience I've ever had. I don't know why I feel guilty. Maybe it's because I feel as if I'm being like Jaime and it's not right that he tells me he loves me and then goes out with someone else and makes fun of me, mocks me, sleeps with her in the same bed where he would hold me of the night."

Vic was really crying at this point. I walked over to him and he looked up at me with tear stained cheeks. I reached down and wrapped my arms around him in a tight hug. He latched himself on to me and cried into my shoulder. I picked him up and took us back to the where I just held him, running my fingers through his hair.

After a while he sat up and looked at me. I gave him a small smile and he smiled back.
"I'm so sorry Kellin." He said and kissed my cheek. "I'm so so sorry." Then he got off of my lap and started grabbing his clothes off the floor.
"Vic what are you doing?"
"I'm leaving." He said and pulled his jeans up his legs. I jumped up from the bed and grabbed his wrists.
"Hey hey don't go."
"I figured you would want me to..." he trailed off.
"Darling no no. I just want you here." I said and kissed his forehead. I led him back to the bed and before I sat us down I unbuttoned his jeans and slid them back off. I then laid us down and I pulled him close to me.

I was hurting yes. Who wouldn't be after hearing that they were basically a thing to take emotions out on but even though it hurt I guess I got his point. He was confused. He didn't know really what to do and I was in this deep already and even though I may end up getting hurt I was ready to take that chance.  He said he was starting to love me and little did he know I already loved him. Vic was one thing I wasn't going to give up on, not until he gave up on me.

Alan's POV

I heard a door shut and rolled over in my sleep. When I did I was disappointed to find no Austin. I fell asleep with him in here and he must have left sometime during the night. I rolled over in the bed again and tried to get comfortable but it wasn't happening. I sat up and pulled my small stuffed animal into my lap (A/N: okay guys stuffed animals are great and I have like six on my bed at the moment. I am 17 and I have no shame in it lol).

I usually would go to Kellin's room when I couldn't sleep but lately he had had Vic over a lot so I wasn't sure when he would be over there and plus I heard some of the activities they engaged in from earlier and I don't want to see Vic or my brother naked in the middle of having sex.

I sighed and leaned my head against my headboard and looked up at the ceiling. I had those glow in the dark stars stuck all over it but the cool thing about mine where that they were different colors. I wish someone was here with me, I thought as I hugged my stuffed kitten.
When I couldn't sleep or had a nightmare or anything like that I always wanted to be around someone. Even if it was just in the living laying on the couch while Dad or Mom watched tv. I know I'm 16 and most people my age don't go running to their big brother when they can't sleep but I did and Kellin didn't mind.

I gave up and was getting ready to go to Kellin's room when my door opened and Kellin himself walked in.
"Hey you're still awake?" He said quietly and walked around to the other side of the bed and got in.
"Yea. I woke up and couldn't sleep."
"Why didn't you come and get me?" He said and I just shrugged my shoulders.
"Alan please do next time."
"But what if your with Vic? I don't want to interrupt you guys." I said and fiddled with the ears of the stuffed animal.
"You wouldn't be.  Alright?" I just nodded and he sighed as he leaned against the headboard.

"Why did you come in here?"
"To see my little brother." He said and I playfully hit him.
"Uh huh sure." I said dragging out the sure. "Now what's wrong?"
"Vic."
"What happened?" I said and lived to sit cross legged beside him.

"He's confused about me and Jaime. He told me he loves us both."
"What?"
"Yea."
"I like Vic and all but doesn't he realize he can't play people like that? I'm not saying he's doing it intentionally and I say he's hurting but what about you? You're hurting too! You like him a lot and you're investing a lot in him. While he's sitting there confused with two guys to cater to him." I said getting slightly aggravated.
"No Alan." Kellin snapped.
"Sorry, but it's the truth." I laid back down on the bed and faced away form Kellin.

"Alan I get what you're saying I do. I just can't see Vic intentionally doing something to hurt me, anyone for that matter."
"I'm not saying he's doing it intentionally but he needs to realize." I said and Kellin just sighed. I turned back over to face him. "What about Jaime anyway?"
"Well he's cheating on him and all this other stuff. Vic doesn't deserve it."
"Why does Vic stay with him of Jaime is like that?"
"That's what I can't figure out Alan."