Comebacks

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1.

I was hoping for a battle of wits, but you appear to be unarmed

2.

Quick! Check your face. Your nose was in my business

3.

Person 1: Gay!

Person 2: I'm straighter than the pole your mum dances on

4.

Person 1: Is this seat empty?

Person 2: Yes it is, and this one will be too.

5.

Girl: You're fat. Me: I'm sorry my stomach isn't as flat as your chest


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