Tip of the Tongue [CMS Bk. 1 - BoyxBoy][Complete/Editing]

Chapter 40

He didn't know for how long he was running. The soles of his feet ached and there were blisters on his toes. His shoes were already in bad shape. The strain he was putting them through now was going to be the end of them.

He wanted to make sure he was as far away from Darrien and Regan as possible. It really didn't matter where he ended up. He just wanted to be alone. He wanted to suffer in piece.

He was gasping for breath by the time he felt like he could stop. He doubled over, hands on his knees, and his head spinning. The forest floor was a blur. He staggered to the side and leaned against one of the many damp trees.

When he tilted his head, raindrops hit his face.

He should have let Regan kill him. That was what he wanted, wasn't it? He wanted to be taken out of this world. He wanted nothing to do with vampires, witches, and hunters. Normal wasn't going to happen. Ever.

He'd finally stopped hoping and all it took was for everything in his life to go to shit.

Ren screamed at the top of his lungs. It didn't matter if Regan or Darrien found him again. The thing was at the surface, he could feel it giving him the strength to do whatever he wanted. Morality vanished and all that was left was his want to destroy everything. No one deserved to be happy. Not when he was in agony.

His head was spinning. He was out of control. He frantically looked around the forest. There were hundreds of eyes on him. He could feel them looking down at him from the tops of the trees. There were whispers from the distance that he was somehow able to hear. He pressed his hands to his head, squeezing his eyes close until he saw sparkling stars in the dark midst. He was going crazy. There was no one here. He was sure of that.

Or was he?

He clenched his jaw. His teeth ground together and his gums ached. The throbbing caused an even worse headache to form at the front of his forehead. With his eyes closed, it wasn't much better. The pain was still enclosing, circling him like a vulture, just waiting for him to give up. The thing wasn't in control either. They were both floundering, but while he was panicking as if the world was crashing down around him, the thing was quivering in the background.

There was something about it that he couldn't understand. Well, there was a lot about it that he didn't understand, but he really couldn't understand this. Things were changing too fast for him to comprehend. One second the thing had fully control over his body and was making him do things that he would never do in a million years and then the next second it couldn't do anything to him.

But the anger was there. That hadn't changed. The main difference was that he wanted to give in. The hunger clouded his judgement and it would be so much easier just to let himself become the monster that everyone already thought he was.

Nothing would change. Nothing was ever going to change in the first place.

He sagged to his knees. He groaned, dropped his hands from his face. He wrapped his arms around his body, huddling as close as he could. A gust of wind slammed into his body. He rocked to the side. The wind was cold on his face, burning his already chapped lips. He licked them, tasting salt.