Tip of the Tongue [CMS Bk. 1 - BoyxBoy][Complete/Editing]

Chapter 49

The sun had set hours ago. The moon was nowhere to be found, lost in the sea of dark clouds that covered the sky in an endless blanket. Ren faced the opening of the cave, his back to the farthest wall. He looked like he might have been keeping watch while Ashton laid on the floor a few feet away from him, but he wasn't at all focused. He was staring into the darkness of the forest while his mind was still going on about the kiss.

The second kiss.

The first one had been chaste, something he might have been able to forget about in time. The second one, however, had been fierce, rougher than Ren knew a kiss could be. It was muddled by the blood lust after Ashton had drank from him. A sort of high that probably made things seem better than they actually were.

Not probably. It most definitely made the kiss better than it was. After everything, it made him feel guilty. He didn't like having these feelings. It was awful to look at Ashton now and see something he wanted, to not have it, and be shamed for wanting it.

It couldn't make up his mind what was the worst thing about having a thing for Ashton Mantel, but there were too many things wrong with it in the first place that it didn't seem to matter.

Two kisses. Two times that Ashton had pressed his lips to Ren's. Two times Ashton got mad at Ren as if it was him that had done it.

He groaned, dropping his head down onto his arms folded over his knees.

This was what he was going to do. He was going to pretend that none of it happened. Or rather, he was going to pretend that he didn't like the kisses.

Because that was the bigger issue. Maybe it was wrong of Ashton to go around kissing him like he had permission. Actually. It was wrong of him. There was issues with consent and all that though Ren wasn't really hung up on it.

He wasn't angry that Ashton had kissed him out of the blue. He should be. Ashton had no right.

He wasn't though.

He liked it. He wanted to do it again.

That was the big problem and he couldn't do shit about it. His feelings weren't an off and on switch that he could go fiddling around with. He wasn't some machine that had feelings only when it was convenient for him.

He let out a dark chuckle.

It would be nice to have that power. He'd do anything to be a mindless robot that didn't think about everything and just did what was right.

His pitiful laugh died off. He turned his head so that his cheek was pressed to his forearm.

Ashton had his back turned to Ren. He was asleep. His body rose up and down in a steady rhythm. His clothes were in a disarray. There were streaks of mud all over the back of his shirt, the bottom of his pants were torn on the left leg, and his shoes had most definitely seen better days.