Nothing Can Compare In This World To You

Chapter 15

Amanda's POV

I sat on the floor by the window with the papers in my hands and looked out over the city. Brian who had stayed here for the last couple of nights and had headed over to the guys hotel now to leave me alone for a while and I would then follow them on tour. 

The reason he wanted to leave me alone was because the papers in my hands, was my fathers will. I had waited so long to read it and now was the time. 

I didn't care to read all the things where he told who got money and other stuff, that wasn't important for me. I laid those papers on the side and the only one left in my hands was a letter from him to me. 

Dear Amanda

When you read this will I already be gone. 

As I'm writing this letter are you on your way to that tour in America and I have to say, I couldn't be prouder.

Take every chance you get to live your dream. Make your name big and make music that people will listen to all over the world. 

I know that this was the last time I saw you, I can just feel that. But it doesn't make me sad because I saw you the way I love to see you. With a big smile on your face. I have to say, you look a lot like your mother when you smile like that. 

I want you to know that I love you with all my heart and that I did everything I could to give you the best life you could get. But I know that your life hasn't been as good as it could have been. Even though you have never complained, I know you missed having a mother. And there is something I need to tell you about it. Something you have to know. 

When your mother left all those years ago she didn't go alone. She took your brother with her. I haven't told you about him before because I wasn't allowed to. Your mother told me that if I would ever tell you about him or her then she would come and get you too. And I couldn't take that.

But now I actually don't care anymore. I don't know a lot about my son, I don't know if he knows about us, what he works with, not even if he still is alive. He is your twin brother and the two of you was absolutely best friends, you loved each other more than everything in the world. 

I want you to find him Amanda. Find your other half and tell him how much I loved him and even though I didn't see him for over 22 years, I never stopped loving him as much as I love you. Try to find your brother Matthew Sanders, that's all I want you to do. 

And remember, nothing can compare in this world to you.

I love you and I will always be there with you even though you won't be able to see me. But we will meet again and I will wait for you. 

Love, Dad 

I sat there in complete shock. I couldn't believe what I had just read. Matt was my brother. 

Matthew Sanders. M. Shadows. My boyfriend's best friend Matt. My best friend Matt. He was my brother. And not only my brother, my twin brother too. 

I really couldn't believe it but it did explain why we looked like each other and why he looked like my dad. 

I must have sitting there on the floor a pretty long time because Brian walked in through the unlocked door.

"Why didn't you open when I knocked?" he asked. 

"Sorry, didn't hear you", I said and stood up. 

"Is something wrong?" he asked and looked worried. 

"Uhm no I just really have to talk to Matt", I said. 

"Okay? I'll text him and tell him to meet us at the bus", he said and started to text Matt. 

"I'll go get my bag", I said and walked over to my bedroom.

I took my bag and then headed out to the living room again. 

"Ready to go babe?" Brian asked and smiled.

"Yeah", I said and tried to smile back. 

Matt's POV

I headed over to the bus when Brian told me to come and that it was important but he hadn't got there once I came. I sat down on the couch and waited for Brian to show up when my phone started to ring. It was my dad. 

"Hi dad", I said.

"Hello son. How are you? What are you doing?"

"I'm good. Just waiting for Brian to come over to the bus."

"Haven't you guys left London yet?"

"No, Amanda was gonna read her dads will today so Brian wanted us to wait until tonight so she could get some time for that", I explained.

"Her dads will?" dad said and sounded kinda nervous.

"Yeah, her dad died remember? I told you that", I said. 

"Matt, I think there is something your mother needs to tell you, hold on a second", dad said. 

I could hear my mom and dad argue about something while I waited in the phone and then my mom got the phone. 

"Hi Matthew", my mom said and sounded even more nervous than my father. 

"What is it that you have to tell me?" I asked. 

"I want you to promise me that you will listen to all I have to say before you get mad okay?"

Oh what was this about?

"Okay mom, I promise." 

"I really don't know how to tell you this. Okay. I used to live in Florida before I met your father. I was together with a man and had two children with him. Our relationship was very complicated and we broke up and got together all the time. We then broke up again and I met another man. This man was very abusive and very controlling. I managed to keep my children a secret to him but then one day were you sick and I had to take you to the doctor, he followed me there and well he saw you. He told me that I would have to get rid of you or he would kill us both. I fled. I fled to California and told your father that he couldn't contact me or you ever and that he couldn't tell your sister about us. I lied and said that I was mad at him but I did it to keep them safe."

I was so confused by the things she told me. "Mom, what is it that you're trying to tell me? I don't understand", I said.

"I'm trying to say that I've lied to you. The father you think is your father isn't and you have a twin sister. You already know her. It's Amanda Luna. But Matthew you have to understand that I only did all of this to keep the two of you safe from this man! And then when I met your father we agreed about not telling you that he wasn't your real father. I'm sorry Matthew."

I sat there in complete shock. What? Amanda was my sister? Dad wasn't my dad? My whole life was a lie? 

"Matthew, please say something", my mom said.

"I… I have to go", I said and hung up.

I couldn't talk to her now. I had to talk to Amanda. I had to tell her about this. Did she know?

Why did my mother decide to tell me now? Why did she even decide to tell me? 

I walked around in the living room to the bus when the door opened and in came Brian and Amanda. I stopped and looked on Amanda with big eyes and she looked at me with just as big eyes.

"You're my brother/sister", we said at the same time.