Blood Love (Alec Volturi Story)

Chapter 30

*Kenzi*
I sat in the small coffee shop, drinking only a water, scared that if I ate anything I would blow up like a whale. I haven't eaten in days, I couldn't bring myself to eat. After all, it was my fault for being too fat, that's why he left me for her. She's tall, skinny, and pretty. Everything that I am not.

"I hope you know that self-pity is such a turn off." I looked up to see Alice standing in front of me. I practically jumped up out of my seat at the sight of her.

"Why are you here?" I hugged Alice before sitting down with her mimicking my actions.

"I saw what happened, Kenzi. I'm so sorry." Alice gave me a sympathetic look and I shook my head, saying that I was fine. "You're not fine. I saw what you told yourself and that's not right. You aren't fat or ugly and eating is for your own good, you shouldn't starve yourself."

"I just can't come up with an explanation for why he would've ignored me all of a sudden. Its driving me crazy, Alice." I ran my hands through my hair, wanting to pull it out. My tears had run dry but I was still frustrated and stressed.

"I've heard of Venus only a few times before. Jasper encountered her way before we met and she was much like Maria. He said that Venus is beautiful but she is a manipulator, and I believe that is why Alec left so suddenly. Those kinds of people, they get what they want at the expense of others." I thought about her words for a moment, really contemplating whether that could be the reason or not. Maybe it was, Alec had done everything he could to get me to Volterra, why would he ruin something that he worked so hard for? But what if he just doesn't love you anymore?

"I don't know what to think right now, everything is just so conflicting and its messing with my head." I told her honestly. It really was giving me a headache and I felt sick to my stomach.

"I'll tell you what, lets get you something to eat and then we can talk some more over shopping, sound good?" I agreed because forcing myself not to eat was probably one of the worst things I could do to myself. I was starving, and it didn't feel good, it didn't make me feel any better.

After I finished eating my first real meal in days, Alice led me out to her rental car and we sped off into London. I wasn't really in the mood for shopping, I wasn't in the mood for anything. All that I wanted to do was to be with Alec, but that wouldn't happen. He probably hasn't even noticed that I'm gone. The thought made the pain get worse, knowing the Alec doesn't even care that I'm gone. I most likely have not passed through his mind once, yet he is all that I think about. How can I not? Alec is my imprint, I love him and I thought that he loved me too. I moved my entire life just to be with him. I left my family and friends for him, I moved out of the country for him, and this is how it all turns out. Great, just great.

"How has Sam been?" I asked as I ate more of my ice cream. Alice insisted that I eat some, saying that ice cream always makes you feel better.

"He misses you, but that isn't anything new. Jacob always talks about how Sam never shuts up about you." Alice told me. The news brought a smile to my face, at least someone missed me.

"I'm going to call him later. I've called him a few times from the hotel but timezones are a pain. What about Renesmee, and everyone else? How are they?"

"Renesmee, where do I start with her?" A small laugh escaped Alice's lips before she continued. "She's amazing. Ness has grown so much since you last saw her, she looks like a teenager now! Her and Jacob have gotten more serious and Edward isn't too happy about that, but he deals with it. As for everyone else, we've been pretty good."

"That's good." I sighed, dropping my spoon into the empty cup of where my ice cream used to be. "I miss you all, I don't understand why I chose to come here instead of home. I should've just gone home." I ran a hand through my hair, realizing that I could've gone home and seen my family.

"Its because you knew that Washington would have been the first place that Alec would've looked. You can always come home with me, I'm leaving in a few days." Alice offered. I wanted to jump at the opportunity to see my family but I wasn't sure. They're your family, why are you so hesitant? "He'll come around, don't worry, I've seen it." She placed a comforting hand on my arm as she realized what was going through my mind.

"I can't-I can't function without him. I can't even have a simple conversation without him invading my thoughts. Its frustrating!"

"It'll be okay, Kenzi, I promise." Alice pulled me in for a hug and I hugged her tight, wanting to scream and cry all at the same time.

"But when? When will it really be okay? Because as far as I know, nothing in my life will ever be okay. It won't because of that stupid day in the clearing where I was stupid enough to ignore my brother and ended up going with the Volturi. It was all because of an idiot who, after all of that, chooses to ignore me for a fucking super model, making me feel like shit because I will never be as pretty or as perfect." A tear escaped my eye as Alice held me a bit tighter, but not tight enough to crush me.

"But you don't have to be, you are perfect to me." My eyes went wide and my blood ran cold as I gripped Alice tighter, I can't believe this.