Gruvia: High School Love-Struck

35 | Speaking Without Talking

<Juvia>
My mind was set as I acknowledged my heart and what I wanted to do. However, my chest pounded like an alarm, echoing and I couldn't relax. The anxiety grew and kept nagging at me.

"Huh? Juvia?" Lucy hung her arm around my chair as I was thinking about Gray-sama and how I was going to confess to him.

"Awwww." Lucy held me in close and hugged me, "you'll be fine, just let your feelings become words." She said, "I'm rooting for you!"

But I haven't said anything yet?
Are my thoughts leaking out?!

"I'm happy that you're supportive." I thanked, "I'm just not sure when to tell Gray-sama." I explained. "W-what if Gray-sama doesn't like me back?"

All these thoughts started to accumulate once again and I felt like my mind was going to explode.

"Don't think about the negatives." Lucy waved her hand, "just get your feelings across. It's worth it." Lucy smiled and held my hands like she had done before. "I'll help okay?"

Really, I'm grateful to have come to Magnolia High. I've met so many great people, made numerous friends, even if bullies still existed.
I have people who are right along my side and that's all that matters.
••••••
"Hey, Juvia? Can you bring this down to student council?" Gajeel handed me a stack on yellow papers. "Natsu's expecting these. I would original go, but the coach is calling me." Gajeel explained.

"Okay." I replied.

"Gee-hee, I owe you one." He winked and ran off.

Walking down to student council. I managed to see Natsu by the door before he went in. He spotted me and waved, "what's up?"

"Ahh, Gajeel-kun wanted me to give these to you." I replied. Natsu took the stack of papers into his hand and looked one over.

"Thanks, we needed these." He smiled. "Forgot about them."

"N-no problem." I added.

"Hey, so I heard from Lucy that you've finally made your resolve, or whatever you call it." Natsu brought up. "Good luck." His words comforted me.

"Found what resolve?" Gray-sama suddenly appeared from behind us and looked over our shoulders.

"N-nothing." I blurted. "Hello Gray-sama." I greeted with an awkward smile.

"Huh? How long have you've been standing there." Natsu titled his head, "anyway, sign ups for the summer events are here." Natsu have half the stacks of paper to Gray-sama."

"Okay, I start posting them up at public boards." Gray said, "I'll be going."

"Hey, walk Juvia back too. She came all the way as a delivery lady." Natsu teased.

Gray-sama nodded his head. "Sure."

My heart trembled instantly and I couldn't look at Gray-sama at all! Natsu?!

"Go on." Natsu gave me a slight nudge on my shoulders and that startled me even more.

"O-okay!" I said as I still kept my eyes away from him.
•••••
On the way, I kept a slight distance between us. My mind was consumed with all these what if scenarios and negative thoughts. It was really unhealthy for me honestly.

"I heard that you and Levy designed the banner for the end of the school year." Gray-sama brought up. "It looks quite nice." He commented, "swung by the prep room earlier this morning."

"It did take a while." I spoke. That banner Levy had told me to pour my soul into and what this school has taught me. That vision became a reason to look like and see what I've accomplished. I have to look forward too and not be a hypocrite.

I stopped in my tracks and pressed my hand, trembling on my chest.

"I-I like you." I muttered softly.

Gray-sama turned around and looked at me. His eyes, his body, his attention all towards me.

"I like you." I confessed a bit louder.
There was silence that surrounded us which made me nervous even more. I want it to be broken, please...say something.
Do something so I can know what you're thinking.

"Gray-"

"Sorry." Gray-sama looked looked away with a gloomy expression. The way he tried to force a smile shattered me even more. And it's because of me.

"I'm sorry, I've said strange things haven't I?" I bowed my head, "I'm sorry for the sudden outburst." My head stayed low and I didn't want to raise it. I refused to lift it now because I don't want him to see my face. I want to cry.

Of course, I felt empty. My feelings didn't get across to Gray-sama at all.

<Gray>
The atmosphere was tense and obviously awkward. because of me. I've been confessed to all the time, so why isn't this seeping in like the rest of them. I'm not sure what this lightness is in my chest.

"Look I-"

Juvia looked up with a regretful expression on her face. Tears accumulated when I was about to apologize to her again. I stopped my words from combing out and she wiped them away.

And yet, she still managed to smile.

"Thank you for listening." She turned around and ran off. It was like a sudden rain shower had appeared out of nowhere, and it didn't seem like it would clear up anytime soon.

"W-wait!" I tried to grab ahold of her when I followed after her but something kept me from doing so. I turned around and stared at the person who held me back.

"Give her some time to calm down." Lyon had his head in the blues as well as he seemed more annoyed than usual. It wasn't long until he released his grip.

"It took her courage you know." Lyon said as he walked off. "No one likes a man who can't understand and accept their own feelings."

"Lyon!" I called for him. Did he know too?

"She rejected me." Lyon said without turning back.

I looked back into the direction where Juvia had made her escape. It was no use in catching up to her now is there? What would I say?

If I had anything to say for my reasons of rejecting her, it would simply be that my heart is not made for it. It's been shelled in ice ever since my parents died. Can I really expect to be happy if I accept the feelings I really want?
••••••••
"Excuse me?" Natsu titled his head and his eyes darted at me so coldly, "you are the shittiest person I know." He sighed with aggravation and accidentally slapped the tower of cards that Erza had built.

"Dude, open your eyes. I know that you like Juvia, everyone can tel at this point. You're just not letting yourself admit it and submit to happiness, are you?" Natsu confronted me. "There's no other chance."

Long minutes past and Erza came back to the table, only to see that her tower had collapsed.

"W-who knocked it over...?" Her voice stayed stable and calm but she began cracking her knuckles.

"W-whoa whoa! Wait a minute!" Natsu hid behind a desk and before he dashed into the halls full of students.
Erza followed him out without running and the shouts of girls claymores the hall. I peered our and saw Natsu shouting at the top of his lung.

"Stop lying to yourself Gray. You can be happy too!"