14 - Questionable Truths

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"Serva me, servabo te"

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"Save me and I will save you"

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14

After the rather scarring and awkward incident, I don't think I can ever get the image of my two roommates locking lips out of my head. Zach's parents had went back to the house soon after the men dropped dead, all the coroner will find is that it was of their own accord. That's what ill lead them to believe. I think they're pretty used to the dead bodies in their wake ordeal. I wonder how long I had left until shit got really serious, but for now I was sitting in front of the best sunset I have ever seen with my 'crush' at my side. Both of us had been silent on the drive up here, not willing to break the peaceful silence which stretched on.

Zach's hand lay intertwined with mine, he probably needed the comfort after the events which spiralled out of control. It was comforting having his warm palm against my cold one, his thumb absentmindedly stroking my skin. My ring must've been ice cold against his skin as his finger grazes it slightly lifting my ring to reveal my minimalist tattoo. I couldn't deny the small gesture sent shivers down my spine. He looked as if he's contemplating asking something.

"What do you want to ask me?" I whisper

"Just wondering if I will ever find out the story of your tattoos? You're like an enigma wrapped in a mind field."

"I love the description" I contemplate answering his question by leaving out the tally marks.

The tally marks on my left wrist had more meaning to me than a gang sign. To me it symbolises my family who is sadly no longer with us.

Each mark represented a member of my family, one for my father, one for my mother, brother and me. The score through it was what held us all together. It was after they died that I wanted to become a part of the Indespectus, wanting to make a difference in this world. I gained the tally mark at the age of almost sixteen after a year of training.

"The first tattoo you already know about, the one on my finger. The number thirteen in roman numerals. Thirteen has always been my lucky number

I have another on the back of my right shoulder of the world map, I get the country shaded in when I visit a new one. It represents the world on my shoulders, it means people are relying on me and I can't let them down." His blue eyes gaze into me as if really seeing me for the first time.

"On my ribs there's gears. There's no particular reason for them, I just thought they looked cool" he chuckles breaking the tense atmosphere

"My ankle I have a small bird to remind me to be free and let no one hold me down. Kind of poetic if you think about it, the design matches the bird cage on my thigh, I never thought I'd be the one for Pinterest tattoos but there you go." I carry on explaining them, despite the lump forming in my throat. Zach stays silent, waiting for me to continue but not pushing me. I carefully show him the ones that are not restricted by layers of clothing.

"Just over my heart there's a date, one specific one that will always stand out to me. No matter how hard I try its emblazoned into my skull. The date my family were killed, it serves as a constant reminder of the pain I've suffered and they will always be in my heart no matter what." His eyes portray the sadness that I'm sure mirror my own. I forcibly chuckle, holding onto the lump in my throat.

"They were..." I break off, my eyes begin to burn along with my heart

Isaac says nothing, why did I tell him my family is gone? Now he'll only see me as some sad case but, I suppose it's better than a stone cold murderer. Not many people knew of my true past, the reason why I joined, became the ice cold assassin I was today. I could feel myself spiralling into a pit of self-hatred, I was unsure if I was able to claw myself out of it again.

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