Adamant(Book 1)

Reconciliation?

Riley POV

All the good and happy feelings from last week seemed to evaporate while my mom and I drove to Anaheim. She arrived an hour ago and I picked her up from the airport and we headed over to see my sperm donor. I know I promised Giselle that I would let him explain but in reality...he had 20 years to come back to us. He was a pathetic loser who  just watched from the sidelines. I'm owed some answers, so is mom. We're gonna get them and then he can crawl into a bottle and die for all I care.

I needed him then and he wasn't around.  If he gives me that bullshit about being scared, I'll take mom and leave him alone. I had a kid thrust into my life and it terrified me to the core. But I never walked out on them. I came close but I know what's right...and what's wrong. Leaving a little boy who lost his whole family  before he turned two and a woman who gave up everything to spend her whole life with me is wrong. Even though I was scared...I stayed. I didn't leave them even though I also fucked up once. Actually no. I didn't screw up. I never slept with Nicole Reganart even though I could have. I thank my lucky stars that Nicole's a good person. If she was some vicious slut...I'd have lost Giselle and Benny.

We were quiet on the drive when my mom spoke up.  "Pull over."

I found a gas station and got out of the car and walked towards some benches where mom followed me. I sat down and so did mom. "I know where we are going."

I was surprised. "Where are we headed?"

"We're going to Anaheim to see your father."

"How did you know that Brant lives in Anaheim?" I asked, my heart racing in anticipation. Does mom know something that she kept from me?

"I know because he sent us financial aid and requests to see you." she responded softly. I was stunned. Brant wasn't totally full of shit.

"How come you never told me that he wanted to see me? How come you let me hate him all these years?!" I tried to control my voice but it wasn't happening. All my life I thought he left and never looked back. He did want to come back...but mom refused him. My mother denied me to my father.

She let out a sigh. "I was afraid of him hitting or hurting you like he did with me...even when he sobered up and committed to cleaning up his act I couldn't take the risk."

"WHAT ABOUT AFTER? I DIDN'T STAY A FUCKING KID MY WHOLE LIFE! GROWING UP, THE ONE THING I WANTED WAS FOR MY DAD TO BE IN MY LIFE! NOW I FIND OUT IT'S CAUSE MY MOM KEPT HIM OUT OF MY LIFE. EVEN WHEN I GREW UP  IT WOULD BE NICE TO KNOW HE SOBERED UP SO WE COULD HAVE SOME SEMBLANCE OF A RELATIONSHIP! " I yelled. I never thought my mother would do something like this.

"You have all the right in the world to be angry with me Riley, but I made that decision to keep you safe. I know you feel like I wronged you both which I did...but your safety and happiness comes in my mind first. I will never risk it."

I sat there stunned.  Now what am I going to do?

"We are all going to his place to talk. What do you think? Are you up to it?" I asked her.

Mom shook her head. "Riley...I haven't seen him in 20 years. I know it's my own fault but...I can't face him yet. I kept this family in pieces and it's my fault."

"Mom, he hit you." I started.

She cut me off " Two wrongs don't make a right Riley."
 

I sighed but Dad knew we were coming. He's expecting us and I don't want him to think we blew him off. I try not to care but I do...especially with mom's recent revelation. He's been sober for 10 years. I don't want him falling off the wagon.