How To Not Write Like an Idiot

Cuz They Anus

Lets talk about an issue so very dear to my heart...
Ah, cheerleading.
I posted the pictures at the beginning of the last couple chapters to see what your responses would be.
What do you think of when you think about cheerleaders?
It's probably a dumb blond with too much makeup going, "Come on football players! Make a home run!"
Do you know why you think that?
It's because of all the books you read and the movies you watch, all portraying cheerleaders as mean and stupid.

Well let me tell you, our motto is "They hate us 'cuz they anus... or was it ain't us...?"

Just kidding...

Anyway, I'd appreciate if you all would quit portraying us as that because you really have no idea.
There is high school cheer, which may be the slightest bit stereotypical, but then there's allstar cheer, which you don't know about. Allstar cheerleaders only compete. We don't use pom-poms, we don't shout or cheer for a team, we ARE the team.

You're here like, Ali stop talking I don't care, cheerleaders suck...

Well guess what? When you can throw people 20 feet in the air, have better abs than most guys, backflip and twist until you're dizzy, and look good doing it in spandex, you can complain mam.
Bye, Felecia. Just kidding, I'm a little too non-hood to use that word.

When you see a cheerleader wearing some skimpy attire, it isn't because she is a hoe. I mean there are those in every group, but with us you must understand that if you are wearing clothes that cover most of your skin the bases' hands will slip or get caught on the clothing, so it's a little dangerous.

But really though, most of my team make honor roll, and we trust each other with our lives... literally.
Did you know that over 60% of ALL sports-related catastrophic injuries are caused by cheerleading? That's because you guys throw a ball, and we throw other people. (*Not to mention we actually catch them) Not only can the flyers get hurt, but the bases get landed on, kicked, stepped on, elbowed, punched, and so on. Not to mention how flexible we are, because while you complain because you can't touch your toes, we have coaches that push us there regardless of how stiff we may be.
3 people catch a 100+ pound flyer. If I dropped a 33.3+ pound sack of flour on your face you would not be a happy camper. And that flour has SHARP ELBOWS.

Just please stop portraying your cheerleader as a sassy, stupid, blond ditz with size DDD boobs.
Pretty please.
Please.
Please.
You are the people that make US look bad.
We will find you.
And throw you.