Broken Letters

chapter 16

When I woke up I expected the pain. I expected the torture, for my safety to just be a dream. Instead I was blissfully painless, which automatically made me think that I had died. Thankfully I hadn't, because if I had then that would mean Adrian was dead as well.

People couldn't hold dead people's hands. And if this was heaven, there was no reason for one to be asleep. Or so I supposed. I wasn't entirely sure what would happen after death.

Mason always refused to tell me.

"He hasn't left your side," I looked up the door to see an exhausted looking Sydney.

"He thinks that it's his fault," she continued and I frowned, staring back down at him. I lifted my hand from his and gently pushed his messy hair out of his eyes to get a closer look. His face was more pale than usual and he had black bags under his eyes.

"Has he been eating?" I said through a dry throat, though I must admit that it felt better than before.

"We force a feeder here every day, it all depends on his mood whether he accepts." Sydney walked in and stood on my other side, studying my face.

"We're lucky that your body is more willing to accept Lissa's magic now, you'd be a lot worst otherwise." I found that odd, since last time Lissa and I had tried my body still barely accepted.

Before I could respond Adrian had woken up, sitting up quickly and blinking blearily before staring at me. It took him a moment to realise that I was conscious, when he did he gasped and hugging me tightly.

"Rose, thank god you're awake, I thought we'd lost you." He kissed my forehead and I simply hugged him back tightly, not answering. I thought he'd lost me as well.

"I'll go get the others," Sydney left us alone as I nodded and Adrian pulled away from me, holding my hand tightly.

"Dean?" he asked softly and suddenly my eyes began to sting and well with tears at the memories. There was a deep ache in my chest that made me feel like clawing at my skin. The pain...of God, it hurt.

"Oh, Rose," Adrian hugged me again, sliding into the bed as I sobbed heavily into his chest, high keens drawing from my throat. I let him think that Dean was just a victim, because, in my eyes, that's all he ever was. I'll die with that information. After all, it is the least that I could do.

That's how people found Adrian and me and slowly, awkwardly, they all shuffled in.

When my crying stopped I was exhausted again and hiccupping.

"Can I have a shower?" I asked into the still quiet room.

"You've been asleep for a few days, and while we tried to get the blood out of your hair we couldn't...and I know how much you hate the hospital robes so I brought you some clothes as well, but they may be too big," Lissa shuffled forward and placed a bag on the end of the bed.

I nodded my head, wiping at my face as I glanced down at the IV in my hand. I frowned and ripped it out of my skin. It was barely a pin prick to what I've been through, so I didn't even wince as it began to bleed. I took the rest of it off and ignored Mum's scolding.

I just wanted to look into the mirror. I wanted to see how bad the damage was. And I did.

The mirror wasn't that big, but it was clean and showed me from my waist up. My brown hair was matted down my back, stuck with blood and dirt and whatever other fluid I had lain in. I wondered how long I had been away, for it to become like that.

My eyes were yellowing, hints of the bruises healing and my nose was slightly crooked from multiple breaks. I was glad that I wasn't awake for Lissa to reset it. My jaw looked bruised as well.