missing | gilinsky

28

There was a lot of shit going on with this whole New York thing but I was determined to at least help Nadia understand the parts that involved her brother. I wasn't going to keep her in the dark anymore, especially with how Justin took advantage of her not knowing stuff. She deserves better.

It was the end of March/beginning of April when I first met Johnson in person. 

I had told Nadia earlier when I first met her that Johnson and I knew each other from vine, that was true, but what I didn't tell her is that Johnson had made arrangements to meet up with me in the city so we could share an apartment. 

Johnson and I talked about a lot of things through vine. At first we just complimented each other's posts, but a little after that it started getting more serious. We started talking about more personal things like where we lived and our families, what was going on in our lives. We ranted. We became close. 

That's why when Johnson messaged me one morning a few days before his birthday asking if he could live with me in New York I wasn't hesitant on saying yes. I didn't ask why, I didn't ask how he would get here, I didn't tell him what to bring or who he was leaving or anything like that. I just told him he could stay with me. We exchanged numbers and the night of his birthday he texted me saying he was on his way. 

I had been in Pittsburgh for a couple of days visiting my sisters Molly and Laura, so I left for New York a while after I got his message knowing it would take him a while to get there from Omaha. 

We ended up running into each other while he was getting off a train from the Chicago Union Station and getting on one from the Pittsburgh Amtrak. The ride to New York Penn Station was a little longer than nine hours so we had a lot of time just to chill. 

He then told me about why he was leaving Omaha, he told me about his dad and mom, told me about Nadia and Hannah. He basically poured his heart out to me so I decided to do the same. 

I told him about my dad, who was and still is in jail for domestic violence and drug abuse, and my mom, who's currently in a home. She's sick. She can't remember anything. The doctors think it's because of how hard dad always hit her. I cringed at the memories, trying to block them out. I told him about Molly and Laura and how they always looked out for me. 

By the time I was done telling him my life story only two hours had passed since we first left the train station. I was used to long rides like this but I was used to riding them by myself, the fact that I had someone sitting next to me sort of made me feel like I had to keep them entertained. 

"You don't have to say anything else, I'll just sleep the rest of the way there," he told me. 

Johnson was a good kid. He's older than me so I guess I shouldn't really be calling him a kid, but still. He was polite and really chill. He wasn't one for pushing buttons. He was nothing like Justin. 

When we got to New York after a few rest stops we walked straight to the apartment building. The apartment that is now Nate's used to be mine. Things got a little sticky when Justin came back to town but that's a different story for another time. 

Anyway, we got to the apartment room and I showed Johnson his room. He thanked me probably a million times before letting me get some sleep of my own.

We lived like that for half a month. Him constantly thanking me for taking him in and him following me to The Den to hang out with all the guys. I wouldn't call us a gang but that's basically what we were. Some of us were drug dealers, some of us were drug consumers, and some of us (like me) were recruiters. 

At first the only means of payment I received was the money Justin gave me just for bringing in new guys, but it wasn't like that with Johnson. I'd stopped recruiting guys for about two months after the police unlocked my dad's saving account that was filled with tons of money for Molly, Laura, and me. When I got the call telling me to head down to the police station I expected them to tell me that the money was stolen and my sisters and I wouldn't be getting any, but when they told me all of it was good and that dad had had it locked away years before he even started fucking around with drug lords, I was pleasantly surprised. I could live off that shit for years.

So no, I wasn't recruiting Johnson, I'd never do that to him. I never wanted him to come across Justin in the first place. He just liked following me around everywhere. We were tight. 

Justin showed back up one day unexpectedly. I had no idea, so of course I let Johnson follow me like any other day. That was the mistake. The biggest mistake I could've ever made. All my mistakes had to do with Justin, there was no doubting that. 

As soon as Justin met Johnson he got his buzz back, he wanted to get back into business right away. He paid one of the guys I worked with to get him info on J and used all of it against him. I never thought in a million years that Justin would bring up Johnson's dad, but when he did I knew I was fucked.

Johnson had told me on the train that he would do anything to find out who killed his dad, and taking the fall for Justin was one of those things. Every time Justin would get into shit Johnson would take the blame, he'd done this only a couple of times before Justin shoplifted some cigarettes and ended up landing Johnson in jail. He was not only charged with theft but with underage consumption of tobacco or some shit like that I can't even remember, and with battery and assault. He was about to be really fucked until Justin came and bailed him out. 

I hadn't seen Johnson for a while and he stopped living with me after all that shit went down. Nate came by to pack his stuff away and sent it to Justin, that's when he took over the apartment. I knew I shouldn't have let him, but he started paying the rent and all that shit so I just let it slide. I'm lucky he even let me stay with him. 

It'd been weeks that I've heard no word from Johnson, not even a text, that's when I started to get a little worried. I stopped by The Den but only found Justin passed out on the couch. Johnson's stuff wasn't even there. Right when I got home after that I bought my ticket to Omaha. I was going to look for him there, or at least find his sister and the girl that he wanted to be more than a friend.

Nate asked a lot of questions about the trip so I eventually cracked and told him what I was doing. I think he was the one who told Justin about it. If I kept my big mouth shut maybe Johnson would be safe. Maybe Nadia would be safe and all of this could've been avoided. 

There's still a lot that I don't know about this situation. I still don't know what's going on with Johnson, I still don't know if I should trust Nate enough to even live with him anymore, and I sure as hell don't know what comes next. 

All I know is that telling Nadia this should fix things between us and give her some closure, because I'm done being fake about everything. I'm giving her all I got and hopefully she takes up the offer. 

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AHH ok idk if that was an abrupt ending or not like I tried to end the chapter on a smooth note but idk, this chapter was sort of just a filler bc I wanted you guys to sort of get the feel of what went on with Johnson and Gilinsky before g went to Omaha and blah blah all that stuff haha, i know it was messy at some parts I feel like I repeated myself a lot, but it happens.

also sorry for not posting yesterday and that this chapter was short (AGAIN)! I was busy as usual, chapter 29 will hopefully be up soon and hopefully be longer and better written than the last two chapters were. dont forget to comment and vote if you'd like, thanks for reading!

- gilinskyshigh