The guilt weighed down heavily on his shoulders. He wasn't the reason she was in a coma, a patient in the hospital for the second time this week, but he still felt as if he were to blame.

He was an alpha, a leader, and protector of those who couldn't protect themselves, yet the number of casualties highly outweighed the number of lives he had saved. El was just another victim of his failure.

It pained him to see her connected uncomfortably to all those tubes and wires that documented her every heartbeat. Her face was bruised and cut up, even colored purple and green in some places. Her pain was never ending as he constantly transferred in into his own body.

Had he realized he was being played the entire time maybe it all could have been avoided.

That was just it, though. He knew this wasn't the last play in the nogitsune's sick game. There were more pawns to be moved. It was likely more people would die. All he could do was be ready to fight when the time came.

"Wake up..." Scott whispered, his hand squeezing hers.

He had been sitting their hours upon hours, staring at her closed eyes, listening to the beeps of the machines that kept El alive.

The door creaked open behind him and he didn't bother to turn and see who had stopped by for a visit, he already knew. "Shouldn't you be in jail?"

Derek leaned against the wall with an exhausted sigh. "The station is a mess. I've been able to slip in and out without being seen."

The teen hummed in acknowledgment. He didn't feel like talking. He was drained both mentally and physically. His best friend nearly killed him a few hours ago and while he had recovered he still felt the pain.

"She's not waking up," Scott whispered. He wasn't sure why he was whispering. He wouldn't be disturbing anyone if he talked a little louder. The doctors said they couldn't be sure if she could hear anything. They described it as her being in a deep sleep, but Scott knew better. El was in a coma, one he desperately wished she'd wake from.

Derek glanced down to Scott's hand gently holding El's. "It isn't your fault."

Scott looked at him over his shoulder, "then why does it feel like it is?"

"Your an alpha. Your basic nature is to protect, but sometimes," Derek sighed. "You can't save everyone."  That was something he had learned the hard way. He lost his entire pack and to this day, it still felt like he was missing a part of himself.

"Scott, you should take a break," Derek suggested as he came to stand at the foot of the bed, but Scott didn't look up this time. He wasn't sure if he was angry at Derek or not. He wasn't sure about anything anymore.

"I'm fine, I'll stay with her." He sighed and closed his eyes for a short moment. He hadn't slept in two days, but it felt longer than that. The only things he had been eating were the snacks from the vending machine down the hall and coffee from the break room.

"I'll keep an eye on her." Derek placed his hand on Scott's shoulder, but Scott shook it off.
"That's what you said the last time I left her with you and see what happened." He nodded towards the hospital bed, to her lifeless body.

Every time he allowed himself to think about you never waking up again, he felt the remorse eating him from the inside out.

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