|| Panchashiti: The Longing ||

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Sutasoma was miffed with Arjuna for not coming out of the forest along with him and deciding to stay in the prison instead

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Sutasoma was miffed with Arjuna for not coming out of the forest along with him and deciding to stay in the prison instead. He refused to have food and sat unmoving on the couch in his mother's chamber. He did not not listen to anybody and finally it was Arjuna's turn to attempt feeding him. He sat beside the son of Krishnaa, holding the bowl of rice in his hands but Sutasoma averted his face frowning.

"Soma, it won't ever happen again," he said gently as he forwarded the morsel of food towards the child. "I'd never leave you again, I promise you!"

Sutasoma turned towards him a bit and contemplated for a moment before accepting the morsel, making Krishnaa and the others who were present in the chamber, Vrikodara and Pritha, let out a sigh of relief. Sutasoma jumped onto Arjuna's lap and hugged him, putting his arms around the former's neck.

"Go out and join your brothers in their play after your meal. They have been looking for you for such a long time!" Arjuna patted Sutasoma's back with one hand, balancing the rice bowl in the other. "Forget about the Khandaca. It was nothing but a nightmare. We are all fine, happy and together. Alright?"

Sutasoma nodded and finished his meal as Arjuna fed him. After that, he took his mother's permission and hurried out of the chamber to meet his brothers. Pritha and Vrikodara too left the chamber after that, leaving Krishnaa and Arjuna alone. The latter was used to spending most of his time in the study section of the chamber in these two months so that Krishnaa could be comfortable. As per his habit, he was going to his space but he paused in between, suddenly feeling confused.

He turned back and glanced at her who was also gazing at him, mirroring his confusion on her countenance. It was strange how their hearts wanted to be with each other but their minds were not cooperating with the idea. Arjuna didn't wish her to feel obligated in any manner and Krishnaa was subdued by the nervousness that had sprung due to the separation. But none of them could step back or move away. Arjuna walked back towards her and breathed deeply.

"I'll be honest. Just like we used to be with each other years ago," Arjuna uttered softly. "I don't know why but I'm unable to go far from you, not even to the other side of the chamber. But I'm not telling this to put any pressure on you but I want to be transparent."

"In that case, can I come with you?" She questioned, a small smile gracing her lips. "I too have some work to complete at the study. It'll be easier to do the work there instead of bringing the parchments here and messing it up."

Arjuna smiled widely as he nodded his head in agreement, his eyes shining with happiness as he moved towards the study so that she could follow him. It was such a small gesture from her but it meant the whole world for him.

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Krishnaa worked on the parchments related to finance, sitting on the couch before a table where all the scrolls and other writing tools were placed. She was solving everything on her own, without any help or reference. There was a time when she used to take the help of Arjuna or Sahadeva but the time and her efforts made her efficient to do it alone. Arjuna couldn't stop admiring her regalia and her finesse as he kept on stealing glances at her everytime he could while he was doing his own armory related work.

Krishnaa was way too focused whereas Arjuna, who was known for focus, couldn't keep his focus on his work. The connection that he had sensed from her eyes, their hug after what felt like eons, an emotional intimacy with her in whose absence he was parched, it all filled him with a boundless yearning for her that he couldn't think beyond her. It all felt like a dream, a dream that ended so soon. The rain of her love in his heart had come to an end soon but it was enough to give him life for many births to come. Though he knew that, he couldn't stop himself from wishing for more. More of that sweetness.

All he could feel was the way her arms were wrapped around him tightly and herself so close to him that there was no scope for the air to come between them, her mesmerizing blue-lotus fragrance filling him with bliss and above all that, her love, her precious love. With the rain pouring above them, he had tightened the embrace, a fierce urge rising with him. He could feel hot tears rolling down his cheeks and he could also feel his chest getting wet with Krishnaa's tears. Those tears merged with the raindrops and lost their existence. The blessed rain had washed away their distance.

As he was observing her keenly while ruminating over all these in his mind, she looked up at him abruptly as if she had sensed his relentless gaze. He shifted his gaze back to his parchment so swiftly that Krishnaa's eyes widened faintly. She pushed the parchments aside, standing up and walking towards where he was seated. He was surprised when she sat beside him, unnerving him with her piercing lotus eyes.

"I think I heard someone talking about honesty!" Krishnaa raised an eyebrow.

"You were also hiding your eyes from me some time ago," he responded. "You were not showing your concern for me overtly until I came closer to you. But that isn't dishonesty because I knew what you were hiding, Krishnaa. You also know what I'm hiding. Leave it."

"Leave it?" She shook her head. "If you can hide it, you can also show it. Don't give me excuses. Be transparent!"

"Fine!" He placed the parchment in his hands away and turned towards her entirely. "Look into my eyes, Krishnaa. It's you who is there and my longing for you that I had borne for twelve years."

She was stunned as she delved into the depths of his eyes with hers and without her knowledge, a teardrop crossed the boundary of her eyes as she lost herself in the ardor in his eyes. He lifted his palm to wipe her tears but before his hand could reach her face, she caught his wrist, forbidding him. He assumed that she was drawing back from his touch and took his palm back, preparing to leave. But her next words stopped his movement midway.

"You can wipe my tears only this way?"

His eyes expanded as he tried to fathom the meaning behind her question. It didn't take him long for the beautiful memories of the past to resurface in his mind. He leaned towards her, his palm gripping one of her shoulders as his lips brushed against her cheeks. Her eyes were closed unconsciously as soon as she felt his gentle kisses on her cheeks but she opened them when he stopped and joined his forehead with hers.

A long pleasant silence enveloped them as they gazed into each other's eyes, basking in love, the love that had been theirs since eternity. The comforting silence persisted until they heard the footsteps of the handmaidens entering the chamber which made them notice that it was the time of dusk. Though they had parted for the moment, their hearts entwined inseparably forever.

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