Just a Pucking Kiss [COMPLETED]

Chapter 53 - More flowers

Morgan

In the din of the cafeteria, all I can hear is JD's voice from the video on my phone.

"...so when I came to your dorm that Sunday, I was convinced I would leave with a broken heart. And as soon as I saw you, I knew I wouldn't be able to handle the pain. You looked so sad, and so beautiful, and just being in the same room as you filled my heart."

He looks nervous, and he's clearly referencing something he has written down. I can feel tears burning behind my eyelids, but I refuse to miss any of this.

"I couldn't imagine the heartbreak that would follow, so I think I just tuned you out. I know I was wrong, and I promise to never do that again. But I was a selfish bastard in that moment, and listening to your voice hurt because I kept thinking, what if you never talk to me again? It was stupid. And I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'll do whatever it takes to earn your forgiveness. Please, just don't push me away."

I cover my mouth with my hand and blink away the tears. On the screen, JD takes a few deep breaths before looking up at someone behind the camera.

"Was that ok?" He sounds so insecure, so scared.

"Yeah, that was good," comes Lydia's voice before there's some jostling and the video ends.

I take out the earbud and close my eyes for a second. I clear my throat to dislodge some of the feelings stuck there. Next to me, Kat removes the other earbud and sits up.

"He's an idiot," Lydia smiles from across the table.

"Yeah," I say and wipe at the corner of my eye. I'm not going to cry in the middle of the cafeteria.

"He's really trying," Kat says and puts an arm around my shoulders. "What are you thinking?"

I shake my head. "I don't know." There's so much turmoil inside me it's hard to figure it all out. But mostly I feel relieved and maybe... hopeful? "I have to get to class."

"Well, my job here is done," Lydia says and grabs her bag. "I told him I would do my best to get you to watch the video, and I did. So I will see you later." She gets up and waves at us with a smile as she leaves.

I put my phone away and grab my tray.

"Are you ok?" Kat asks and follows me.

"I don't know." I put the tray away.

"Just take your time." Kat gives me a quick side hug.

I try to focus on class, but my mind returns to the video and I keep watching it, over and over. After class, it's impossible to focus on anything else. I let Kat see the video again and we analyze every detail. She doesn't even roll her eyes when she wakes up in the middle of the night and I'm watching it again.

But every time I see how nervous he is, how uncomfortable, it melts my heart a bit. And he sounds so sincere when he promises to never tune me out again.

By morning, I know that I'm going to forgive him. He wasn't there when I needed him, but he's showing me that it wasn't on purpose. And I start to recognise that I should have told him. As soon as the concussion faded, I should have talked to him. It's a mistake I'm never going to make again.

As my last lesson of the day is coming to an end, I'm wondering what I should do now. Should I go to the hockey house and hope he's there? Or maybe text him?

I'm still trying to make up my mind when class ends and I see him waiting for me with a bouquet and a gift bag. His eyes flicker from person to person until they land on me. And then he shifts from one foot to the other.