the bad couple

chapter 45

"p-please stop" i beg as my dad slaps me across the face.
"dont fucking say a word" he snarls at me, i whimper and he drags me i to his bedroom, i realise whats about to happen and can't help the tears that run down my cheeks, i pull from his grip and run for the door to find it locked i turn to see an evil grin on his face as he shows me the key in his hand, he then throws it to the dresser and grabs me by my arms pinning me to the wall, he starts kissing down my neck and his grip is too strong to struggle in, his lips stop just above my over sized top, his hand slides up it from the bottom and he starts roughly caressing my breast, i whimper making him go harder, his lips drop to my breast as he uses his other hand to pull my head up by my hair.
"please, I'm sorry" i beg, he bites me roughly being sure to leave a mark, he pulls back and flings my thin body to the bed by my wrist, i scramble and try to jump off but he grabs my ankle, pinning me down, then I see him grab ghe foil packet.
"callum help!" I shout out, why did I shout for him?
"shut your mouth, no one will ever help you" he snarls as he slips on the condom, i try to struggle but I'm paralysed under hus weight as he straddles me, he slips my underwear off and starts kissing my neck getting lower to my stomach.
"callum!" I shout again.
"come on, wake up" i hear someone say, but it's not my dad, it's familiar but I cant place it.
"please leia, wake up" another voice says.
"help!" I call out to them.
"leia, come on, it's only kyle and callum, he can't hurt you, wake up, we're here" the first voice says.
"leia, wake up please" the second one begs desperately, suddenly I'm sitting up straight in bed, my sheets drenched in sweat and my hair is sticking to my face.
"leia, it's ok, look it's me and kyle" callum says as our eyes meet.
"are you ok?" kyle asks.
"ah... Yeah" i say looking down.
"do you wanna talk about it?" callum asks softly.
"no, I'm gonna get a shower" i announce.
"okay, I'll be in my room and kyle will be on the sofa if you want us, ok?"
"ok, thanks" i say and practically run to the bathroom.
"she was calling out got your help" i hear kyle say.
"i know, i heard" callum replies sadly, shit, why did I call out for him?
"did she usually have nightmares when you two were together?"
"yeah, I'll talk to her in the morning"
"she won't sleep again, after that, she was terrified"
"I know" i hear a door close and then I strip down and climb into the hot water streaming out of the shower head, i step in and start to wash my body, but immediately break down into tears, i curl into a ball and hold my shaking body as the tears stream down my cheeks, i cry for what seems like hours but is probably actually only half an hour, my eyes are eventually out of tears and i decide to get out and have a proper shower later, i dry off and change into a pair if sweatpants and a loose top, i check my phone and see that it's four in the morning, i go downstairs and make a coffee, trying to be as quiet as possible to not wake kyle, sleeping peacefully on the sofa, i go to my balcony and look out at the dark blue sky with the shining stars and bright full moon, will I ever really recover? Will I ever go a week without waking up covered in sweat, shaking with fear because of what my own parents put me through? Will I ever lead a normal life? Would it help if i talked to someone about it? Will I ever be able to trust callum, i want to, i really want to trust him, but I cant and i cant be with someone that I don't trust, life is so unfair, i never did anything wrong but I'm handed a life of abuse, neglect, loneliness, pain, hurt, heartache, lies, broken trust and more, if i wasn't born, my mum and dad would have still been madly in love, they wouldn't have killed my little sister, she could have been the daughter they could be proud of, but because of me she died, soon i break down into quiet sobs.
"leia?" I hear a gentle voice ask, i turn to see kyle.
"sorry, i didn't mean to wake you" i say as I wipe my eyes, he takes the seat beside me.
"you didn't, come here" he says opening his hands, i rest my head on his shoulder and his arms hold me in a tight comforting hug.
"it's ok leia" he says gently petting my head, I don't say anything else, he continues comforting me and we stay like that for a while, eventually I stop crying and sit up straight Indian style.
"do you want to talk about it?" he asks after we reposition and are both sitting Indian style with my head resting on his shoulder.
"no" i say quickly.
"okay, i won't push you into it" he says gently.
"thank you" we sit in silence for another while and i realise how much if an amazing best friend kyle is.
"thank you kyle" i say quietly.
"for what?"
"for being such an amazing best friend"
"this is how you friend zone me?" he jokes and i giggle lightly.
"seriously though, thank you"
"your welcome, you deserve the best of best friends and the best person to make you happy, like callum" he adds.
"i want to trust him, but I cant"
"you called out for his help, when you were sleeping"
"I know, i live him kyle, but I cant trust him, i don't think I'll ever be able to fully trust someone and i cant be with someone I don't trust"
"do you think it would be easier to trust him again if you were with him?"
"I don't know, after everything, i don't see how I'm meant to trust again"
"he is good for you, the way he looks at you, and you him, it's obvious you two share something special, he makes you happy, happier than I've ever seen you"
"but he hurt me"
"he regrets that, alot, we were talking about it and it's obvious it kills him to know what he did, he would spend a lifetime making up for it"
"should i give him a chance?"
"you should, he makes you happy"
"thank you" we stay silent for another while and we soon hear the bells and decide to get ready for class.