Surrender -Tom kaulitz-

42.

POV Tom

"So you're like having casual sex now ?" Bill asked as he was drying off the clean dishes.

"I don't know, Bill." I sighed, putting my phone down on the table and pulling out my cigarette pack. "I don't know what we are but it's not awkward so I'm not going to overthink it for now."

"She seems happy in... whatever you two are." He giggled. "I'm glad you both gave yourselves a chance. I was about to convince myself you two weren't going to be anything after all that time. But I'm happy it worked out."

"Yeah..." I drowned my face in my hands. "Fuck, I just can't stop thinking about her. And... after we had sex, it just got harder."

"That's what she said." My brother giggled and I bit back a smile, flipping him off.

"Something weird happened though..." I blew the smoke away and Bill looked at me with furrowed eyebrows.

"During ?"

"Yeah..." I sighed. "When I wanted to take off her sweater, she... didn't want me to."

"She didn't want to show you her scars. It's normal."

"But I've seen them before. Why would she still be ashamed of them ?"

"It's not about that, Tom. She doesn't feel comfortable having someone be this close to her scars. Even if you saw them before, she's still sensitive about them."

"I don't want her to be." I pursed my lips.

"Yeah, well.. It is what it is. Just don't pressure her into feeling comfortable with you. Let her be."

"Of course not."

"Good boy." bill grinned widely. He walked out of the kitchen, ruffling a hand in my hair when he passed by me. "I raised you well."

I groaned, fixing my hair as he just left giggling.

☆ . ° .• °:.*₊° .☆ ☆ . ° .• °:.*₊° .☆

I was casually working on my bedroom's computer when a light knock on the front door stopped me in my track. I sighed heavily, standing up and walking to the entryway.

It couldn't be Bill, he left an hour ago to see some friends and there was no way he was back this early. When I opened the door, my face darkened as I locked eyes with the one person I didn't want to see.

"Gosh, Chrissy ! This again ?! Can't you just fucking-"

"I won't be long !" The blond girl interrupted me, walking into the apartment. "I'm just here to clear the air."

"There's no air to fucking clean, Chrissy !" I threw my head back, closing the door and following her in. "I don't know why you're even still talking to me."

She turned to face with a small flirtatious smile. "I'm not mad at you, baby... I just wanted to apologise."

I marked a pause.

What was she even talking about ?

"I recognised that girl. The girl who punched in the face. Well, no, I actually made some research. She's a friend of you guys, right? An old friend. She's your ex, isn't she ?"

"What ? No." I furrowed my eyevbrows. She stepped towards me, placing her manicured hands on my chest.

"Don't worry, you don't have to lie to me anymore. I watched your interview with her and Bill. Where you said she was your girlfriend. It's okay, I can get past that. I promise."

I grimaced in confusion, before slapping her hands away. "We weren't dating, not that it is any of your business. I don't need you to get past anything, cause we aren't fucking together, Chrissy ! Why can't you fucking comprehend that ? You embarrassed youself at my party, you attacked my friend and you're acting like a fucking psycho ! So how about you get the fuck out of-"

The door's bell went off and interrupted my yelling. I furrowed my eyebrows.

Who the hell is it, for fuck's sakes?

I angrily brushed a hand through my hair, powerwalking to door and opening it widely. My body stiffened when I saw Mars standing up in the entry way, in a big grey sweater and sweatpants.

"Hi." She smiled softly but her grin slowly faded away when she noticed my annoyed expression. "Oh, I'm sorry. Is this a bad time ? I was just coming by to give you back-"

"Who's that ?" The unbearable voice of the blond girl resounded from behind me. Chrissy walked up to us and her face dropped when she laid eyes on the brunette. "Oh... it's... you."

Mars stared at her with an unreadable expression, then she looked at me. "I'm sorry, I didn't think I was going to interrupt whatever... this is. Here, take your hoodie. I kept it by accident, I just thought I'd..."

She handed me the black hoodie I gave her the night I slept over. I took it from her slowly. "Wait, Mars. It isn't what you think. She was just-"

The brunette beamed softly. "It's okay... I'll just see you around, Tom." She looked at Chrissy then me. "Sorry again for... coming over unannounced."

She turned around to leave and I grabbed her wrist to stop her. "Mars, please don't-"

She snatched her arm away from my grasp, hissing in pain. "Ouch ! Tom !"

"Oh, fuck, I'm sorry." I bit my lip frustratedly, mentally slapping myself for forgetting about her cuts. "But, I swear, Mars, it was-"

She sighed, looking up to me through her eyelashes. "It's alright. We'll just hang out soon. Just..." She pointed at Chrissy who was awkwardly watching the scene from behind me. "Deal with her and we'll talk later. Bye."

She walked away from my apartment and I stood there, clueless.

Fuck.

"Alright, we can continue talking now." Chrissy shrugged her shoulders carelessly and penetrated the apartment.

I clenched my fists, seeing red. I slapped the door shut and hurried into the apartment. "Chrissy, I swear I'm going to do something I'll regret and you're-"

"Tommy, calm down-"

"GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE NOW !" Her body flinched at the anger in my voice and she backed off.

"What the..."

"I fucking swear Chrissy, if you don't fucking grather your shit and go, I'm going to do something about it."

"Fuck you, Tom." She pouted, grabbing her purse and her coat, then she walked out of the apartment, the sound of her heels clacking against the wooden floor.

I breathed out rapidly, rage taking over my senses. After a few seconds, I sat back on the couch and burried my face in my hands with a sigh.

Why couldn't my life just pass by easily ? I had my band, I had my twin, I had Mars... I didn't want anything else.

But my mistakes just keep blowing up on my face. Chrissy was a parasite in my potential happiness and I couldn't let her fuck up any aspect of my life. I knew Mars wouldn't trust me easily but I tried so hard to establish trust between us. I just hoped that the fact that she saw Chrissy and I alone in the apartment wouldn't mess up with that trusting process.

And I swear to every god in this fucking universe, if I see that bitch Chrissy again, I will literally  beat her up.