Surrender -Tom kaulitz-

33.

(Still Tom's pov)

I sipped from my beer, watching Mars as she conversed with the others.

"What about your father ?" I cut her off and she turned to me. "Do you still live with him ?"

She looked down, fidgeting with her hands. "No, I don't. He's dead."

Bill placed a hand on his mouth in shock. "I'm really sorry, Mars."

"What happened ?" I questioned and she bit her lip.

"He shot himself two years ago."

"Oh my god..." Georg laid back.

"It's okay." She sent him a small smile. "He was an asshole anyways."

"Yeah, but he's still your father." Gustav placed a comforting hand on her knee.

"What about your brother ?" I added and she frowned.

"What is it with all these questions ?" She laughed nervously. "He's alright, Tom. Still alive."

"That's good. I mean... I really want to know what you're up to, what your life is like." I sat back, manspreading. "I'm guessing you know what ours looks like. We've been on tour for the last five years and we just came back from Russia. We don't plan on going on any tour for at least three months."

"We would love it if we hung out like old times. You with us, like before." Bill rested his chin on his hand, looking at her intently.

She seemed hesitant as her eyes darted around the room. "I'm happy you guys grew more successful. I really am. But for me, I'm still living in the same town, doing the same things I've been doing for the last five years. I just get paid for it now, that's all."

"And are you happy ?" Georg suddenly blurted out and the brunette blinked at his question.

"What ?"

"Are you feeling fulfilled with your life right now ?" He shook his head. "Mars, we love you and we want you to be as satisfied as you wish to be. It hurts to see you like this now. Especially after we stopped talking to you."

Mars fidgeted with her hands. "I'm alright, don't worry. I get it. I get that you stopped talking to me because... Well, I don't really know why but let's just say we grew apart. And I'm not one to blame you for it."

I hesitated for a moment. "It's my fault." I finally breathed out. "I told them to stop talking to you."

She looked at me in surprise, a hint of pain readable in hey eyes. "Really..." Her voice came out with a whisper.

"Yes." I pressed my lips together. "They didn't want to. But they did for me. Don't blame them."

"I wasn't-"

"It's okay. We're all together now." Bill clapped his hands, cutting off the brown haired girl.

"Yeah, no need to hold onto the past." Gustav added.

"Um..." Mars sighed. "I need to go to the bathroom." She stood up and walked to the hall Georg pointed at.

We watched her leave quietly. But, as soon as we heard the door close behind her, Bill's face shot towards me. "God ! Could you be more... despicable ?!"

I raised my hands in surrender. "WHAT ?!"

"Yeah, man. You're being an asshole." Gustav sipped from his beer.

"The fuck did I do ?" I widened my eyes. "You guys see her, don't you ? She looks fucking depressed."

"Yeah." Georg brushed a hand through his short hair with a sigh.