Hue In My World (Indian BL)

28. (16+)The wait, the worries and the anxiety

 ** Slight NSFW**

Nakul and Dhiraj were in the car and Dhiraj could just feel something different about Nakul. He was awfully silent, but at the same time he caught him wearing a smile on his face. Is it because of that guy? They reached their parking lot and Dhiraj stopped the car. Nakul got ready to get out but he found Dhiraj sitting in the car and not getting out. Rather, he looked mad about something.

"What happened?"

He noticed something is wrong now? Dhiraj controlled the anger rising within him. "I don't see the jacket we got today. Where is it?" He hinted at Nakul to tell him about an "important" event that he chose not to share. It wasn't about the gift. Dhiraj could buy 100 more of such jackets for Nakul. It was simply the fact that Nakul gave another person something Dhiraj had gifted him. That feeling just felt.....awful.

Nakul just blankly stared at him, not sure if he should tell him about meeting his brother or not. It wasn't that he didn't want to tell Dhiraj about it. It was the questions that would follow that he was afraid of. Questions like: Oh, how's your Uncle and Aunty? Questions that would mean Nakul explaining his family situation. A sticky situation. 'Sticky' was an understatement given what his Bua had done. And he especially wanted to avoid the question: Why did she do what she did? Because if I tell you about her.......You might start seeing me differently. That thought sent a cold shiver down his spine. No! He can't risk letting Dhiraj know about what his Bua did.

'I.......I gave it to a friend." Lying took over. That response didn't really help Nakul's case.

"You just......gave it to someone?!" Is that what my gift means to you?

"Look.....it's not like that."

"THEN EXPLAIN IT TO ME!" Dhiraj nearly shouted and Nakul was taken aback by that. He hadn't seen Dhiraj angry after the incident about his mother.

"Why......Why are you mad?" Nakul was scared now. He was lying. Plus Dhiraj was so mad at him. His heart was beating so fast that it could explode.

Dhiraj immediately noticed that expression and it brought him back to his senses. NO. Just be a bit patient with him, screamed one part of him. While the other screamed, But how could he do that to me? I bought it for him with so much love. And then......why did he have to hug that man? To Dhiraj it just felt unfair. He was trying to be so patient with Nakul just so that Nakul would give all of himself to Dhiraj. But. He then just.....He's making it difficult for me.

In a small pitiful voice, Dhiraj asked Nakul about him, "Who was that man you were hugging? Why did you give him something that I gifted you?"

He knows.

"He....He's a childhood friend. He's moving to Scotland. Rather he's settling there. And I......I think I won't be ever seeing him again...." Nakul rubbed his palms in an attempt to hide his emotions, but his eyes were giving it all away.

On the contrary, Dhiraj found a sudden sense of relief in those words. So that guy's leaving. Oh! Dhiraj let out a mental sigh of relief. But his relieved state of mind didn't last that long. The look on Nakul's face said it all. Those eyes had a sense of loss. A loss that one doesn't have the hope to find again. Seeing those eyes, Dhiraj felt a bit guilty.

"School friend?" He asked his baby.

"No. More like....a childhood friend. I....never really had any friends. Kids thought I was weird. There was just a sense of anxiety that I felt as a kid." Nakul recalled those grey memories of his childhood. Sitting alone. Reading a book in a corner. Watching kids play from afar. Rather wanting to play with them, but....just not being able to. "I just had my sister back then. And then he moved into our neighborhood."