After disappearing off the face off Wattpad for about a year I am finally back. But why? I had abandoned this app completely. I wasn't writing on here anymore. It was mostly because I had moved on to other platforms such as Instagram and Medium, but it was also because of the lack of time.
Now, I have finally graduated. After the rush of the final school year, I am finally in this highly anticipated timeline. I have wanted to be in this moment for so long and yet I find myself grasping at straws. I had so many plans. I had so many places I wanted to go and things to do. Where did they all go? My ambitions have disappeared along with my sleep schedule and routines.
I had promised myself that I would complete all of my pending WIPs, but here I am wondering what they were even about.
Truth is, no one really told me about this—about this feeling. It is hopelessness mixed with lack of self worth. I have nothing to do, nowhere to be, and no one to be with.
I dreamt of paradise on Earth when I was studying for my final exams. "Just a few more months," I said to myself, "then you're done. You can relax." I had such high expectations. I wanted to get a job. I looked for prospective employers while I was studying. I wanted to bake so I looked for recipes I wanted to try. I saved them in a folder on my Instagram and I never looked at them again. I wanted to draw, paint, write, practice my instruments, and go to the gym. While I have done some of these to some extent, they don't give me the same joy. It's almost as though I was dependent on school to help me feel something. Now I am sucked out of that life. I have to find a new purpose and I am worried I won't find it in time.
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Life of an Indian Teenage Girl
Non-Fiction🏅 Winner of The Dreamer Awards 2020 🏅 🏅 Third place in The KitKat Awards 2020 🏅 Just a few bits of my life as an Indian and a teenager. This is basically my book of memories. It also contains random thoughts, feelings or anything I need to get...
