A TOUCH OF DARKNESS

3 •

On a Friday night, the sky looked clear and empty around my windows. I liked that. All dark and only the moon is a face to my darkness. All chill and relaxing. Amazing.

I had a small cup of coffee in my hands while sitting out on the balcony. I relished the smell of dry air that had been built through the sun for a while, aside from it would've been way much better if it rained right now and all of this dry ground would be washed into a fresh-smelling scent.

"Hey babe!" I heard Joe's voice and it made me wish I was able to put the world on quiet mode and live my moment all alone, but of course, I couldn't. Especially not from Joe.

"Hey..." I placed my cup down on the table beside me and watched him take the seat. "How was the club?" He let out a deep whine before his head fell back onto the chair. He looked exhausted, but we both knew that whining and exhaustion was just an act of a request.

"I can't do this anymore. Ugh. I'm so tired and I can't believe I have to tell her and her to do this and that. The life of a man is so exhausting." I nod. Joe was an asshole. And I mean it.

I do not mean that he just acts like one. Fuck no. Every inch of him was filled up with shit and poisonous. He drank bullshit and dirt ran through every vein that exist in his body.

And you're probably wondering why am I with a person that I hate so much. Why do I allow myself to get his orders completed and 'yes' to every single word he suggests I to do?

I wish I could say I could run away from him easily and never return back or look behind me, but sadly I knew my life was in his hands, I knew he controlled me with the tip of his fingers.

I couldn't just stop him from playing me. He knew the spot that hurt me the most and knew exactly how to open the same painful stitches that were left behind in my past.

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"Joe...hey? Don't you think you're friends are looking at me weirdly?" I said holding tightly on his arm onto my dear life. There was absolutely something off with this 'boy's night'. He told me they were going to play video games together and I was allowed to hang out with them as I didn't want to stay alone waiting for him to return back, but I don't like this...

At first, I was happy to hear him say that to me, but once I saw them drinking beer and smoking wildly I got self-conscious and uneasy between them. Something was off and the way the video games didn't even start worried me more. It was the reason we all were here, at one of his friend's houses. I hated the way they were sober.

I've always told Joe to quit smoking, quit the alcohol as I cared and loved him so much. Of course, I didn't want to see him end up in hospitals with medications. I loved him and meaning that, I had to take care of him by telling him what was best for him, or eventually end up hiding it from him. Knowing Joe means that Joe did what he wanted to. He didn't listen.

"What do you mean?" He laughed it off. He was drunk and I didn't like this anymore. It wasn't funny and I just wanted to go back home. To my real home. To my mom's house. And not the one I recently lived in. My mom hated Joe, but sometimes she allowed him to come over just for me. She didn't like the age difference between us even though it was just 3 years. She told me he was a bad guy and I shouldn't let him touch a piece of my hair or any inch of my body.

I didn't listen to her because I knew and we both loved each other, we wouldn't end up in trouble, we always solved them, talked about what bothered us, and then cuddled with kisses. We understood each other's feelings.