To be Frantastic

Final Chapter/Session: Happiness

So much happened...

I needed to find out I had depression to start trying to get myself fixed.

I needed Sasha to find the cuts so that I realized I could still feel pain.

I needed Troye to find the red and yellow pills to help me see that I'm not on my own.

I needed to come out to Zoey to learn more about myself than what I wanted to admit.

I needed see Andrea's heart break to realize how much my friends mean to me. And I needed Sam to find the blue pills for me to see how much I mean to my friends in return.

Then I needed to come to terms with myself to see that in the end, I didn't need fixing. I just needed acceptance. I needed closure, and I was denying that to myself. Why? Well, because I was afraid, and lost! You should know! You've been there every step of the way!

But with falling and trying again, comes learning, and comes wisdom. Wisdom enough for me to realize eventually that all I wanted, was to accept myself for who I truly are.

Don't you think?

Ring! Ring! Ring!

I turned around and saw my laptop glowing and vibrating. I was getting a Skype call... and I knew just from who.

With a wide smile I rushed towards the hotel bed, fell on the sheets and opened it, immediately answering to the video call, and meeting face to face with Troye.

-"Hey!"-Troye greeted, with terrible bed hair and sleepy eyes.

-"Well good night to you!"-I said, laughing-"What's it like, three in the morning?"

-"Two thirty, but the details can wait. So... how has it been so far over there?"

I got myself comfortable, lying on my stomach and lifting my legs up, resting my head in my left hand. Troye looked sleepy alright, and I could tell that he was in his unlit bedroom, which is pretty typical of him if you ask me.

-"Well the place is lovely."-I said-"And the people here are so nice. Everything has been going on smoothly, and after today's session I'll be back at my apartment."

-"Ugh... I can already feel the five hour drive."

-"If I'm lucky maybe I'll do it in less!"

-"HA! Yeah, right... Connor we both know you drive waaaay too safely. Even my grandma used to drive faster than you!"

I gave Troye my best offended expression, to which the both of us laughed. Real laughter, the one he taught me.

-"Did you vlog the place?"-he asked-"Like you said you would?"

-"Yeah! You know, I did the usual vlog routine... I teased them about Monday's collaboration I have with Tyler, then I showed them a bit around... didn't tell them why I was here, though."

Troye nodded silently.

-"Yeah... some things are better kept secret, right?"-he grimaced.

-"Hmm... not secret... private. For everyone's sake, you know? This is a huge step for me... and I know that it'll do me good."

I saw how Troye thought about what I said, and then smiled at me.

-"I'm happy you're doing this, Connor. I'm happy because... because I see that it makes you happy..."

I laughed a bit, and then went silent. I have been thinking about this thing, and about how I could bring it up with Troye, because he knows it better than I do, but I haven't really thought about how I should bring it up... Luckily for me, he noticed right away, like always, that there was something on the tip of my tongue.