Chapter 19 - Answers

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Sana had her mouth in her throat as her bua jii entered inside along with her. This woman has been one hell of a headache to her from the beginning and now her being here was the add onto all the current problems 10×.

"Ye kya hein bahu ghar ke bahar nimboo mirchi nahi lagai hui", she asked.

"Kash lagayi hoti aap jaisi buri chize door rehti", Sana inwardly said to herself.

"Jii voh udhar lgaya hein buri nazar ke liye", Sana said pointing to the evil eye show piece hanging in the drawing room.

"Yeh aaj kal ke bache bhi desi chizan te door bhajte rave hein", she said shaking her head.

"Ghar te Saaf suthra dhar ri se (house is neat and clean)", she added as she entered inside.

"Kam kum khud karti hein ya kaam vali aati hein", she asked pointedly and Sana barely nodded.

"Yeh shehar mein ake ladkiyon ka dimag phir jata hein, khud se inse kaam hi hone band ho jate hein, kal ki kal hata deh joh bhi aati hein use khud kiya kar, sehat ke liye bhi acha rehta hein or doh paise bache vo alag", she said.

"Jii", Sana said biting her lip.

"Beta kaha hein humara", she asked after a while.

"Pata nahi", Sana blurred out.

"Pata nahi kya hota hein tera pati hein voh", She quoted.

"Voh mera pati nahi hein samjhe aap",Sana said agitated.

"Yeh tarika hein bado se baat karne ka", she reverted back in a harsh tone.

"Maaf kijiye", Sana said lowly with a sigh.

"Beta kya baat hein batayegi", Bua jii asked, this time the sweetness dripping off ,gave chills to Sana.

"Kuch nahi bua jii voh kuch kam se bahar gaye hein aa jayenge 1-2, matlab thode din ka bolke gaye hein", she said correcting herself.

"Acha kaam se gaya hein phir to koi na", she said.

"Toh apko kya laga",Sana asked with a sharpened gaze.

"Ki tujhe chod ke chala gaya", she blurted out and Sana bite onto her lip.

He has left her, hadn't he?

"Jii", Sana mumbled glaring at her.

"Kuch na, kuch puchegi ya bs aise hi bithaye rakhegi", Bua asked changing the topic.

"Hnmm", saying so Sana left.

"Merese Saari dushmani ek sath nikali hoti hein kya apne", Sana said looking up at the imaginery god.

"Pehle kam rola tha joh or add kar diya apne iss aurat ko bhej ke", Sana complained to god.

"Haye mujhe toh abhi vapis bhi jana hein class ke liye lekin inhe pata chal geya toh Yeh mera jeena haram kar dengi hey bghwan! Kya karu mein", she said talking to herself.

****

Sidharth gazed at the beach in front of him and felt like he could breath again. Although he felt like he could breath again but the peace was still missing. He didn't felt as great as he used to be, being here. A beach side restaurant in Goa is what used to bring him peace throughout the hardships of life but today, it didn't heal him. Infact as he sat there his mind wandered onto the thought of what Sana would be doing by this time, he could imagine her finishing off the household chores as it was late at night, ie, post dinner.

"God!", he mumbled to himself in a stance to shake his head off.

He don't know what he want at this moment. But the peace which he has assumed to achieve on this tour wouldn't come his way, he could tell that for sure. It's been just a day that he has came here but there was something wrong, the whole vibe felt wrong.

The guilt which he has came carrying with himself, felt to be increasing a few notches higher. But still, he'll get the time to think and rethink about the current situations of his life. He leaned his head back at the chair he was sitting on, to gaze at the beachy water.

"Kuch soch rahe ho", he heared a unfamiliar voice making him open his eyes.

The voice belonged to a man, must be in his late sixties, though his face do looked old with the wrinkles but he wasn't the typical fatty big old man with spectacles or someone who's unkept. He looked handsome as per his age.

"Aap", Sidharth questioned.

"Hii! Haider this side", the old man said introducing himself.

"Kis gehri soch mein ho, janab!", the man asked and Sidharth felt like his tongue worked without his mind's agreement on telling him anything.

"Pata nahi bus ek gunah hein joh mujhe samajh nahi aa raha ki mein uska kusurwar hoon ya nahi or agar hoon toh khud ko sazah kaise doon", he said with his gaze fixated back at the water.

"Pyaar Ko gunah samajh rahe ho", Haider asked.

"Kind of! but it's somewhat twisted I mean I don't know", he sighed.

"Pyaar hein", Haider asked.

"Yahi toh samajh nahi aaraha agar hein toh mein zindagi bhar iss guilt mein jiyunga ki maine apne pyaar ko uske pyaar se juda kar diya or agar pyaar nahi hein toh baki ki sari zindagi ek aise shakhs ke sath guzregi jisse pyaar nahi hein voh bhi iss guilt ke sath ki jisse tha use Jane diya", Sidharth said with a bitter smile covering his face.

"Elaborate", Haider said.

"Jiske sath pyaar hone na hone ka sawal hein voh meri bhabhi thi but aab unse rishta kuch or hein agar mein unke meri bhabhi hote hue pyaar mein tha toh shayad bghwan ne meri ardas sun ke mere bhai ko unse cheen liya joh mujhe gwara nahi or agar mein unse pyaar nahi karta toh baki ki zindagi vaise hi mein unke naam karna chahta hoon toh voh bin pyaar beetegi", Sidharth said.

"Tumse ek sawal puchu jawab doge sach sach, shayad tumhe khud bhi jawab mil jaye apni baat ka", Haider said.

"Puchiye", Sidharth agreed.

"Naam kya btaya ladki ka", Haider asked.

"Maine btaya nahi but it's Sana", Sidharth replied wittily.

"Aaj jab tum yaha beithe ho toh uska khayal aa raha hein, Sana ka", Haider asked.

"Apke ane ke panch minute Pehle mein yahi soch raha tha ki voh abhi ghar pe kya kar rahi hogi", Sidharth replied with a light chuckle.

"Beta itna toh mein tazurbe ke sath bol sakta hoon, tum pyaar mein ho, uske naam se aaya tumhare chehre ka Yeh noor kafi hein ikrar ke liye",

"Phir maine toh bahut bura kar diya na unke sath, maine unhe unke pyaar se alag kar diya", Sidharth said gazing at the water.

"Beta Yeh sab qismat ke khel hote hein, jinpe insan ka koi kabu nahi hota. Isliye tumhe bhi jyada nahi sochna chahiye joh jaisa hein use vaisa accept karo, kya pata kal kuch isse bhi bura hona ho ya joh hua ussi ki vjah se kuch acha hona ho, isliye voh hua. Or kehne mein toh aisa bhi ho sakta hein na, ki tumhari mohobat ki shiddat itni zydaa thi ki tumhe usse milane ke liye hi bghwan ne Yeh sab Maya rachi ho", he explained and Sidharth gazed at him in disbelief.

For a moment, he saw the light.













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