Always There || Greta Van Fleet

Chapter 139: No Going Back

When I opened my eyes, the room was still dark, nothing but my laptop on Josh's lap illuminating his face as he scrolled through, his eyes focused, his fingers pressed up against his lips the way they always did when he was deep in thought. I took a second to just watch him before he realized I was awake, loving the idea of waking up to him every morning.

But then as I sat up, I caught a quick whiff of coffee in the air. Looking over I saw he had made a cup for me, leaving it out on my end table as he sipped his with a satisfied smile.

"Good morning." He said, finally peeking over at me.
"What time is it?" I asked, reaching over for my cup, taking a sip. It was still scorching, and made just how I liked it. He hadn't been up for long.
"About 6:30.." He groaned. I knew he was still exhausted, we had barely slept for a few hours, but he needed all the time he could get to make sure he was back in time for their show tonight.

"What are you doing?" I asked, cuddling closer, leaning my head on his shoulder. He leaned is head on top of mine, continuing to scroll through the airline website.
"Just booking my ticket." He said. "So.. it's good that you're up, because.. I kinda need to know if I'm getting one for you too." I leaned over, gently kissing his cheek before climbing out of bed, grabbing my phone from my dresser.

"I'll call her and see how everything is doing, okay?" He nodded, flashing me a tired smile before taking another sip of his coffee. I turned on my phone and quickly made my way down the hall, down stairs and out onto my back steps.

There was something so hauntingly beautiful about the darkness of the morning, just before sunrise, the ground still damp from the night before, the chill in the air that managed to creep its way into your bones.

I had spent countless mornings waking up early just for a chance at a glimpse of them making their way down their dirt path in order to make it up to the lake for sunrise, just hoping, praying that one day they'd invite me along.

And now here I was.

Soon enough, my phone began exploding with messages, the first being a missed call and a voicemail from my aunt. It was so funny how much she resisted texting, but sometimes it was just nicer to hear someone's voice for once.

Hi Jaime, it's me. So she's checked into a room, and she's all good. A little tired but it's to be expected. Don't worry, I told her that you and Josh were here. She seemed happy to hear about him, see I told you she liked him. Anyway. She's doing just fine, and I'm here with her. Hopefully you guys.. got enough sleep, and she said she insists you go back with him if that's what you want to do. She'll be okay here with me so don't worry about that. She says she'll have her phone on if you want to call her later and you guys can talk. Alright, feel free to call me when you get this, otherwise, I'm going to assume that you booked your flight. Okay, talk to you later.

It felt like a weight was lifted from my shoulders, but every time this happened I just couldn't help but wonder when one of these days, our luck was going to run out. I was just relieved that I didn't have to spend the night alone. I knew I wouldn't have slept at all.

And then the texts from Jake started flooding in.

Jake: hey, you're probably sleeping, but I'm so sorry for how that all went down. I don't want to fight with you. I never want to fight with you. You were right and I'm sorry. I don't want that to be what we are, I want to be better than that. I'm sorry I'm quick to snap sometimes, I've just never felt this much for someone before and I'm terrified to lose it. Please don't give up on me. I love you <3

Jake: I'm gonna keep working on it. I promise. We can work on everything together. All I want is to grow with you, Jaime. I want everything with you, and I know things might not be perfect but they're close to it, and I think that one day they can be.